The Advice Goddess

Westword.com ^ | Amy Alkon

[Millee]

I'm 40, the cute girl from upstairs is 23. When she stopped by to commiserate about loud neighbors, we had a beer, went dancing, and then had sex. Afterward, she seemed weird and left abruptly. I wrote her a note, "Sorry if I made you uncomfortable, but I love you and look forward to seeing you again." She hasn't looked at me since. Where did I go wrong? -- Mr. Neighbor

Grateful as you may be to a girl for having sex with you, it's never a good idea to let on. You could've had a future with her -- the kind 40-year-old guys without handfuls of bling typically have with 23-year-old girls: jump-starting their cars, lugging their couches up four flights of stairs, and maybe catching a little action when there are no hot young guys to be found. You blew it, though, with "I'm a lonely sack of emptiness!" -- which is how "I love you" translates after one beer, one dance, and one roll in the sack. (You say "I love you"; she says "It seemed like a good idea at the time.")

[PaulaB]

Can we help it people

want to be near us?

Well of course not darlin...

are we bitter...only if you can't swallow it baby

[Dashing Dasher]

I feel pretty,
Oh, so pretty,
I feel pretty and witty and bright!
And I pity
Any girl who isn't me tonight.

[Dashing Dasher]

Aren't you supposed to over at Clown Posse by now?

[PaulaB]

Did we decide the name would be Batman and Robin?

[Millee]

I get to be Princess Wino!!! I get to be Princess Wino!!!

[Dashing Dasher]

Absolutely!

Everything thinks they are gay - but they think they are superheroes.

Perfect.

[PaulaB]

[Dashing Dasher]

I get to be Princess B#tch!


;-)

DD

[dorathexplorer]

[SweetCaroline]

Dear Alpha Female
Keep it up, your getting them riled!
Thanks,
One of your Freeperettes

[PaulaB]

Here we all are...YIPPEEE

[PaulaB]

ROFL

I love ya sister!!!

[Dashing Dasher]

[Dashing Dasher]

Thanks, babe!

;-)

[najida]

Was Tinkerbelle a Princess?

I wanna be Tinkerbelle.

[Dashing Dasher]

Tinkerbelle was a fairy, I believe.

[HitmanLV]

You're so vain....
I bet you think this post is about you....
You're so vain....

:-)

[EX52D]

[PaulaB]

You can be a fairy love....

no matter what anyone says!!

[Dashing Dasher]

From Wikipedia:

Tinkerbell or Tinker Bell (the author's spelling of the name) is a fictional character in J.M. Barrie's play and subsequent novel Peter Pan. She is a sometimes ill-behaved and vindictive, but loyal fairy who is Peter Pan's companion.

In one famous scene, she will not die if enough people believe in fairies. The resultant plea to the children watching the play or movie is an example of "breaking the fourth wall"; in the novel and the 2003 movie, Peter calls out to dreaming children within the storytelling universe to sustain her.

In the end of the novelization, when Peter returns to Wendy after a year, it is revealed that she "is no more" since "fairies don't live long, but they are so little that a short time seems a good while to them." Like nearly everything that has happened in the story, Peter has forgotten her—real death and sadness cannot exist in his everlasting childhood.

PS... I think I shall name my next Rottweiler, Tinkerbell.