Posted on 10/28/2005 7:10:26 AM PDT by BJClinton
Funny thing happened on the way to the office...okay, not really funny, but upon entering my office I was smacked in the face with the overwhelming smell of propane (insert Hank Hill joke). Our office shares the same building with a restaraunt (source of the propane leak) and a veteranarian's office, so I've spent the last few hours evacuating cats, dogs and some kinda lizard from the vet and trying to convince English-challenged kitchen staff to evacuate. But that's over, I'm back at home and it's time for a beer. Oh, and the OFST ping list is on a 'puter surrounded by explosive gas so if y'all could ping some of the usual suspects...
You'll have to enlighten me then.
Is that even possible? Pair up AND go alone?
They are playing "The Time Warp" from Rocky Horror on the radio. You know its time to roll now!!!!
Later ...
easy on the Vampire brew ;)
Man, does that bring back memories.
I like most of the list... this one... not so much.
Have a good one....
Have a good weekend!
#510 - LOL
Printed that and posted it outside my cube. thanks!
Bye JRBC. Have a good one
I got
You big woolly woolly thing ;)
You know why you face the sheep towards a cliff, don't cha?
... Police arrested Malcolm Davidson, a 27 year old white male, resident of White Plains, NY, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38pm Friday. Davidson will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency,and public intoxication at the County courthouse on Monday.
The suspect allegedly stated that as he was passing a pumpkin patch, he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't" he stated in a phone interview from the County courthouse jail.
Davidson went on to state that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need".
"I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment.
In the process, Davidson apparently failed to notice the White Plains police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him. "It was an unusual situation, that's for sure" said officer Taylor. "I walked up to (Davidson) and he's...just working away at this pumpkin."
Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Davidson. "I just went up and said, 'Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?' He got real surprised, as you'd expect, and then looked me straight in the face and said, 'A pumpkin!? Damn...is it midnight already?'"
... Fun things to do on Halloween
=> When selecting treats to pass out at the homestead, avoid non-nutritious candies and gums. Instead offer celery and blue cheese sauce platters. While the neighborhood rugrats may loathe you, you'll undoubtedly be a hit with the local dental hygienist (Note: House windows should be securely boarded before attempting).
=> Take care to choose a Halloween personae that lends itself to self-defense. A wicked witch with the trademark broom has a vast combative edge over an wand-wielding fairy.
=> When trying to choose an appropriate costume, be sure to select the darkest colors available. Go for black ninja suits or other non-reflective garb.
=> Costume accessories can really make the difference. Avoid using plastic props. Opt for real cutlery to stand out in the crowd.
=> And for little tikes, don't garb them in a white bed sheet that's bound to get tarnished! To cut Halloween budget corners, use white kitchen garbage bags. The costume also doubles as a large goodie bag, in the event that the feelings of asphyxiation simply become too unbearable for the youngster.
=> When out collecting candy, visit houses in out-of-the-way dimly lit areas. Especially look for houses without *any* lights on. These are the enthusiasts trying to make Halloween especially authentic and eerie for little ghoulies.
=> If no unlit houses can be found in your area, you will be forced to approach the well-lighted houses. But don't knock on the door! Instead, sneak around an knock on windows or rustle around in crawl-spaces. The resident family will appreciate your sense of originality and will likely reward you handsomely.
=> You can also look for organized community events to entertain teens. Who can forget playing "Disintegrate The Mailbox," "Pumpkin Toss," "Teacher Toilet Paper Party," "Plastic Pumpkin Pillage," and "Pummel The Ghoulies."
=> Before bobbing for apples at your local Halloween carnival, fill your mouth brimming full with ketchup. When underwater, discharge the goo, then frantically jerk your head up out of the water screaming, "Razor! Razor!"
Pissant told me once but you'll have to refresh my memory.
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