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MORFORD: God Does Not Want 16 Kids
San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 10/19/5 | Mark Morford

Posted on 10/19/2005 7:48:41 AM PDT by SmithL

Arkansas mom gives birth to a whole freakin' baseball team. How deeply should you cringe?

Who are you to judge? Who are you to say that the more than slightly creepy 39-year-old woman from Arkansas who just gave birth to her 16th child yes that's right 16 kids and try not to cringe in phantom vaginal pain when you say it, who are you to say Michelle Duggar is not more than a little unhinged and sad and lost?

And furthermore, who are you to suggest that her equally troubling husband -- whose name is, of course, Jim Bob and he's hankerin' to be a Republican senator and try not to wince in sociopolitical pain when you say that -- isn't more than a little numb to the real world, and that bringing 16 hungry mewling attention-deprived kids (and she wants more! Yay!) into this exhausted world zips right by "touching" and races right past "disturbing" and lurches its way, heaving and gasping and sweating from the karmic armpits, straight into "Oh my God, what the hell is wrong with you people?"

But that would be, you know, mean. Mean and callous to suggest that this might be the most disquieting photo you see all year, this bizarre Duggar family of 18 spotless white hyperreligious interchangeable people with alarmingly bad hair, the kids ranging in ages from one to 17, worse than those nuked Smurfs in that UNICEF commercial and worse than all the horrific rubble in Pakistan and worse than the cluster-bomb nightmare that is Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise having a child

as they suck the skin from each other's Scientological faces...

(Excerpt) Read more at sfgate.com ...


TOPICS: Weird Stuff
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Morfordite Alert

You've been warned!

1 posted on 10/19/2005 7:48:49 AM PDT by SmithL
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Markie's whining about those "Breeders", and it's all Bush'e fault.


2 posted on 10/19/2005 7:49:59 AM PDT by SmithL (There are a lot of people that hate Bush more than they hate terrorists)
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To: SmithL
From what I've read, these folks are upstanding individuals/citizens who do not rely on government assistance for their children, who teach their children well, and who honor God. They have the right to have as many children as they desire. That's a few too many for my blood, but I'm not them! :o)

The author is disgusting, imho.

3 posted on 10/19/2005 7:54:47 AM PDT by mrs tiggywinkle
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To: SmithL
The little guy with his finger up his nose is just adorable. Very funny.

btw, I like your tagline.

4 posted on 10/19/2005 7:57:25 AM PDT by mrs tiggywinkle
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To: mrs tiggywinkle

let me get this right, this idiot bemoans the fact that this family has alot of children? hmmm, by the looks of that family, i think we should clone them. i have a severe suspiscion that none of those kids are in a gang. to me, they look like what americans are supposed to look like, but hey, im a discerning kind guy.


5 posted on 10/19/2005 7:59:58 AM PDT by son of caesar (son of caesar)
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To: SmithL

Why bother? There's no arguing with someone like him. Let him rant to his brainless audience. They probably worship him.


6 posted on 10/19/2005 8:01:44 AM PDT by Chanticleer (Education without values, as useful as it is, seems rather to make man a more clever devil. Lewis)
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To: SmithL

Shameful article.


7 posted on 10/19/2005 8:02:42 AM PDT by KC_Conspirator (This space outsourced to India)
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To: mrs tiggywinkle

Thank you.


8 posted on 10/19/2005 8:03:08 AM PDT by SmithL (There are a lot of people that hate Bush more than they hate terrorists)
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To: SmithL

I have a sister-in-law in WI that has her 11th on the way. No twins or she'd be right up there with this family! Oldest is 17 also - first born 9 months after the wedding and they've not stopped yet.

The worst of the matter is that he's a criminal defense lawyer working for himself and they are so out on the left fringe it's frightening. And now they've got 11 (almost) little left-fringe clones. Look out world!


9 posted on 10/19/2005 8:03:20 AM PDT by leapfrog0202
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To: SmithL
Dear Markie:

You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As they say in Texas. I’ll bet you couldn’t pour !@#$ out of a boot with instructions on the heel. You are a canker. A sore that won’t go away. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. You’re a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon. You are a bleating foal, a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into this world. An insensate, blinking calf, meaningful to nobody, abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts who sired you and then killed themselves in recognition of what they had done. I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformation. I barf at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you smell? Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attempting to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it more rapidly. You snail-skulled little rabbit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs. You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You’re a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won’t have sex with you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot. And what meaning do you expect your delusional self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with us? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake? You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral[size] equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling meat slapper. On a good day you’re a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go. You smarmy lager lout git. You bloody woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock. You grotty wanking oink artless base-court apple-john. You clouted boggish foot-licking twit. You dankish clack-dish plonker. You gormless crook-pated tosser. You churlish boil-brained clotpole ponce. You cockered bum-bailey poofter. You craven dewberry pisshead cockup pratting naff. You gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. You dread-bolted fobbing beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill. You are a fiend and a coward, and you have bad breath. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away. I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid. Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I’m sorry. I can’t go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don’t have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of this drivel. Duh. The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped away most of what you wrote, because, well... it didn’t really say anything. Your attempt at constructing a creative flame was pitiful. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a load of babbling was hardly effective... Maybe later in life, after you have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us ”normal” people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometimes forget that there are ”challenged” persons in this world who find these things more difficult. If I had known that this was your case then I would have never read your post. It just wouldn’t have been ”right”. Sort of like parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you. P.S.: You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful, cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable, belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal, fascistic, bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic, brain-damaged, imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame, self-righteous, byzantine, conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent, libelous, bilious, splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking, devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic, fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased, suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim, crazy, weird, dystopic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim, unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive, mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive, abusive, socially-retarded, puerile, clueless, and generally Not Good. (yes, I’m done now)

10 posted on 10/19/2005 8:04:02 AM PDT by xcamel (No more RINOS - Not Now, Not Ever Again.)
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To: son of caesar

"let me get this right, this idiot bemoans the fact that this family has alot of children? hmmm, by the looks of that family, i think we should clone them. i have a severe suspiscion that none of those kids are in a gang. to me, they look like what americans are supposed to look like, but hey, im a discerning kind guy."

I do have to agree with you, son of caesar, these kids look like typical all-American, wholesome kids. More power to parents that can raise them like that considering the influence drugs and gangs have on kids. None of them appear to be wearing 'slut wear' or 'gang bang' garb either! That in itself says a lot for the parents way of life!


11 posted on 10/19/2005 8:07:18 AM PDT by leapfrog0202
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To: SmithL
But that would be, you know, mean. Mean and callous to suggest that this might be the most disquieting photo you see all year, this bizarre Duggar family of 18 spotless white hyperreligious interchangeable people

***************

"Mean" doesn't even come close. This man is hateful, and is evidently disturbed.

12 posted on 10/19/2005 8:09:04 AM PDT by trisham (Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.)
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To: Tax-chick

Family sized ping.


13 posted on 10/19/2005 8:09:45 AM PDT by Rebelbase (""As far as I can tell, she (Miers) is every bit as conservative as George Bush." --NCsteve (FR))
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To: SmithL

Mark should be thrilled by this. The Duggans have produced 16 future taxpayers who will fund the social programs that he loves so much.


14 posted on 10/19/2005 8:11:42 AM PDT by SilentServiceCPOWife
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To: SmithL
Where is the liberal, spiritualized, pro-sex flip side? Verily I say unto thee, it ain't lookin' good.

This is why blue staters are an endangered species.

Basically liberals are anti-sex, seriously. Well not all sex, they seem more than fine with sex as long as it isn't productive. If it is with a person of the same gender or if it is wrapped in latex, then and only then are they fine with sex, but if the couple is heterosexual, married, and open to children then their left wing version of neovictorianism jumps right to the forefront.

15 posted on 10/19/2005 8:12:36 AM PDT by NeoCaveman (the DNC's new slogan "how can we fool em today?")
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To: xcamel
Now tell us how you really feel :)

I liked your rant so much I copied it so I could use it on some people who annoy me.

16 posted on 10/19/2005 8:13:09 AM PDT by rllngrk33 (The RATs and Media are the enemy.)
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To: xcamel

That would make one heck of a tagline.


17 posted on 10/19/2005 8:16:03 AM PDT by SmithL (There are a lot of people that hate Bush more than they hate terrorists)
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To: rllngrk33

Did I put "festering gobutit of malodorus fecal excreta" in there?


18 posted on 10/19/2005 8:17:28 AM PDT by xcamel (No more RINOS - Not Now, Not Ever Again.)
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To: SmithL

I think it was Discovery or the Nat Geo channel that featured this family about 6 months ago.

The parents have everything well organized, all the kids have chores and tasks to perform from about the age of three. They have a pantry the size of a small warehouse full of food bought in bulk, and showed how the meal prep, laundry and clothing organization, schoolwork etc. was done.
Seemed like one big happy, healthy family.


19 posted on 10/19/2005 8:20:51 AM PDT by tertiary01 (For every Act of God, the Libs will demand a human sacrifice.)
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To: SmithL

But Mo, what about the unwed kid factories down in the ghettos? Silence......crickets chirping


20 posted on 10/19/2005 8:22:57 AM PDT by Ursus arctos horribilis ("It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees!" Emiliano Zapata 1879-1919)
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