Did Andy Rooney Say....?

[COBOL2Java]

Say, is that a recent photo? Looks like he finally got a makeover! Hair Club for Men?

[processing please hold]

He's too leftist to say anything near that. Now, if we were asked to interpet it to opposites, it would be him.

[Artemis Webb]

He did not say it. But his comments concerning France (written in 2003) are a gem even for those of us who support the war on Iraq:

---

"You can't beat the French when it comes to food, fashion, wine or perfume, but they lost their license to have an opinion on world affairs years ago. They may even be selling stuff to Iraq and don't want to hurt business.

The French are simply not reliable partners in a world where the good people in it ought to be working together. Americans may come off as international jerks sometimes but we're usually trying to do the right thing.

The French lost WWII to the Germans in about 20 minutes. Along with the British, we got into the war and had about 150,000 guys killed getting their country back for them. We fought all across France, and the Germans finally surrendered in a French schoolhouse.

You'd think that school building in Reims would be a great tourist attraction but it isn't. The French seem embarrassed by it. They don't want to call attention to the fact that we freed them from German occupation.

I heard Steven Spielberg say the French wouldn't even let him film the D-Day scenes in "Saving Private Ryan" on the Normandy beaches. They want people to forget the price we paid getting their country back for them.

Americans have a right to protest going to war with Iraq. The French do not. They owe us the independence they flaunt in our face at the U.N.

I went into Paris with American troops the day we liberated it, Aug. 25, 1944. It was one of the great days in the history of the world.

French women showered American soldiers with kisses, at the very least. The next day, the pompous Charles de Gaulle marched down the mile long Champs Elysee to the Place de la Concorde as if he had liberated France himself. I was there, squeezed in among a hundred tanks we'd given the Free French Army that we brought in with us.

Suddenly there were sniper shots from the top of a building. Thousands of Frenchmen who had come to see de Gaulle scrambled to get under something. I got under an Army truck myself. The tank gunners opened fire on the building where the shots had come from, firing mindlessly at nothing. It was a wild scene that lasted, maybe, 10 minutes.

When we go to Paris every couple of years now, I rent a car. I drive around the Place de la Concorde and when some French driver blows his horn for me to get out of his way, I just smile and say to myself, "Go ahead, Pierre. Be my guest. I know something about this very place you'll never know."

The French have not earned their right to oppose President Bush's plans to attack Iraq.

On the other hand, I have."

[Mr. Mojo]

It was George Carlin.

Nope.

[radioman]

And if you get any emails about something George Carlin wrote you can similarly disregard it

Don't have cable or Dish Network? It was George Carlin.
.

[TitanicMan2003]

http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/rooney4.asp

Sorry. Rooney didn't write this (it's an updated version of the one at my link). And contrary to other claims, it doesn't seem to have been written by Carlin, either. The author is unknown.

MGY

[hiramknight]

"or was that Robin Williams?"

Robin Williams did the isolationist piece. The one that said we should pull our troops out of all the corners of the world and appologize for our interfering in world affairs and promise never to do it again. Another good one.

[End Times Sentinel]

A GREAT PLAN

Leave it to Robin Williams to come up with the perfect plan . . . what we need now is for our UN Ambassador to stand up and repeat this message.

Robin Williams' plan...(Hard to argue with this logic!)

I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of one plan for peace. "Books, not Bombs" won't work. The head mullahs won't let anyone read them. If they do, they poke their eyes out.

Here's the plan:

1) The US will apologize to the world for our "interference" in their affairs, past &present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini and the rest of them 'good old boys'. We will never "interfere" again.

2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany, South Korea and the Philippines. They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No more sneaking through holes in the fence.

3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave. We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of who or where they are. France would welcome them.

4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit. No one from a terrorist nation would be allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it yourself, don't hide here. Asylum would not ever be available to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers.

5) No "students" over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don't attend classes, they get a "D" and it's back home baby.

6) The US will make a strong effort to become self sufficient energy wise. This will include developing non-polluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while.

7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go someplace else.

8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not "interfere". They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides most of what we give them is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if any anyway.

9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an island some place. We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, it would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.

10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us "Ugly Americans" any longer.

Now, ain't that a winner of a plan ??

 

Owl_Eagle

(If what I just wrote makes you sad or angry,

 it was probably sarcasm)

[ElkGroveDan]

No it was actually Robin Williams and George Carlin. I know, because I read it in an email from a friend of a friend of a friend.

[dead]

The author is unknown.

It was written by the lovable but cranky guy down at the end of every old man bar in America.

[petro45acp]

Maybe, he did, maybe he didn't, maybe he said it earlier this year, or last year........or not.

http://www.altavista.com/web/results?itag=ody&q=%22I+believe+that+if+you+are+selling+me+a+milkshake%2C+a+pack+of+cigarettes%2C+a+newspaper+or+a+hotel+room%2C+you+must+do+it+in+English%21+%22&kgs=1&kls=0

Cheers,
Top sends

[Mike Bates]

Nah, it was some guy from Nigeria.

[Rokke]

It wasn't Carlin, Rooney or Nugent. Last time I tried to figure out who the author was, it turned up the piece was (believe it or not) originally posted by.....drumroll....a Freeper on FreeRepublic. I'll dig around and see if I can find his name.

[processing please hold]

Thanks for the link, very interesting.

[radioman]

I'll have to correct my Carlin reply. This email contains lines from Carlin's HBO special and lines from Carlin's "Bad American" email hoax.

I think it's great on it's own, but is probably plagiarized from several sources.
.

[Pantera]

Thanks, you guys are great. I knew that communist scumbag didn't say anything like that.

[dolphin558]

bump

[Hildy]

No...he didn't say nor did George Carlin.