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PLANET-DISSOLVING DUST CLOUD IS HEADED TOWARD EARTH!
Weekly World News, via Yahoo ^ | Monday September 12 - 2005 | MIKE FOSTER

Posted on 09/20/2005 5:25:47 AM PDT by vannrox

PLANET-DISSOLVING DUST CLOUD IS HEADED TOWARD EARTH!
Monday September 12, 2005



By MIKE FOSTER

CAMBRIDGE, Mass. -- Scared-stiff astronomers have detected a mysterious mass they've dubbed a "chaos cloud" that dissolves everything in its path, including comets, asteroids, planets and entire stars -- and it's headed directly toward Earth!

Discovered April 6 by NASA's Chandra X-ray Observatory, the swirling, 10 million-mile- wide cosmic dust cloud has been likened to an "acid nebula" and is hurtling toward us at close to the speed of light -- making its estimated time of arrival 9:15 a.m. EDT on June 1, 2014.

"The good news is that this finding confirms several cutting- edge ideas in theoretical physics," announced Dr. Albert Sherwinski, a Cambridge based astrophysicist with close ties to NASA.

"The bad news is that the total annihilation of our solar system is imminent."

Experts believe the chaos cloud is composed of particles spawned near the event horizon of a black hole (a form of what's called Hawking Radiation) that have been distorted by mangled information spewed from the hole.

"A super-massive black hole lies about 28,000 light-years from Earth at the center of our galaxy," explained Dr. Sherwinski.

"Last year the eminent physicist Stephen Hawking revised his theory of black holes -- which previously held that nothing could escape the hole's powerful gravitational field. He demonstrated that information about objects that have been sucked in can be emitted in mangled form.

"It now appears that mangled information can distort matter.

"Just imagine our galaxy the Milky Way as a beautiful, handwritten letter.

"Now imagine pouring a glass of water on the paper and watching the words dissolve as the stain spreads. That's what the chaos cloud does to every star or planet it encounters."

To avoid widespread panic, NASA has declined to make the alarming discovery public. But Dr. Sherwinski's contacts at the agency's Chandra X-ray Observatory leaked to him striking images of the newly discovered chaos cloud obliterating a large asteroid.

"It's like watching a helpless hog being dissolved in a vat of acid," one NASA scientist told Dr. Sherwinski.

Ordinarily, Hawkings Radiation is harmless.

"It's produced when an electron- positron pair are at the event horizon of a black hole," Dr. Sherwinski explained. "The intense curvature of space-time of the hole can cause the positron to fall in, while the electron escapes."

But when "infected" by mangled information from the black hole, the particles become a chaos cloud, which in turn mangles everything it touches.

"If it continues unchecked, the chaos cloud will eventually reduce our galaxy to the state of absolute chaos that existed before the birth of the universe," the astrophysicist warned.

Some scientists say mankind's best hope would be to build a "space ark" and hightail it to the Andromeda Galaxy, 2.1 million light-years away.

"We wouldn't be able to save the entire human population, but perhaps the best and the brightest," observed British rocket scientist Dr. David Hall, when asked about the feasibility of such a project.

But even if such a craft could be built in time, evacuating Earth might prove fruitless if theories about the origin of the chaos cloud are correct.

"A black hole at the center of Andromeda is about 15 times the size of the one in our own galaxy," Dr. Sherwinski noted. "It might be like jumping out of the frying pan into the fire."

Speaking under the condition of anonymity, a senior White House official said the president's top science advisors are taking the findings in stride.

"This is a lot like global warming, where the jury is still out on whether it's real or not," said the official.

"The existence of this so called chaos cloud is only a theory. Americans shouldn't panic until all the facts are in."


TOPICS:
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To: William Creel

LOL!!!


61 posted on 09/20/2005 6:07:13 AM PDT by metmom (Welfare was never meant to be a career choice.)
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To: vannrox
"...that have been distorted by mangled information spewed from the hole..."

That'll teach 'em to read the Times.

62 posted on 09/20/2005 6:07:17 AM PDT by Snickersnee (Where are we going? And what's with this handbasket?)
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To: vannrox

The good news is that this finding confirms several cutting- edge ideas in theoretical physics," announced Dr. Albert Sherwinski, a Cambridge based astrophysicist with close ties to NASA.

"The bad news is that the total annihilation of our solar system is imminent."


I'm a little fuzzy on this good-bad thing.


63 posted on 09/20/2005 6:08:30 AM PDT by Joe Driscoll
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To: Constitution Day

Sounds like he got a hold of some really really really good acid.


64 posted on 09/20/2005 6:08:35 AM PDT by highlymotivated (If American ever falls, a STINKING LIBERAL will be behind it.)
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To: vannrox

65 posted on 09/20/2005 6:10:42 AM PDT by Constitutionalist Conservative (Have you visited http://c-pol.blogspot.com?)
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To: numberonepal

LOL! You get my vote for post of the day!


66 posted on 09/20/2005 6:10:43 AM PDT by texpat72 (<><)
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To: vannrox
"Just imagine our galaxy the Milky Way as a beautiful, handwritten letter.

Pardon me? I thought all the universe was the result of time and random chance. How could it be 'like' something that obviously requires intelligence to create?

67 posted on 09/20/2005 6:10:48 AM PDT by MEGoody (Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.)
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To: TomGuy

Don't forget to stiff your landlord (or mortgage holder, as the case may be) for the June rent(mortgage payment).


68 posted on 09/20/2005 6:10:53 AM PDT by Cheburashka
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To: vannrox

Oh Goody, now I won't have to suffer through any more Detroit Lions seasons of futility.


69 posted on 09/20/2005 6:12:31 AM PDT by dfwgator
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To: hocndoc
Women and minorities effected the worst."" um, I think you mean "affected." Unless you're saying that women and minorities caused this tragedy. (Sorry, couldn't resist - I wouldn't have played grammar cop on a series thread. That would have been hughly rude.)

Sorry, I do not know what a series thread is. Please explain.

Or did you mean serious thread? If you're gonna throw stones don't stand in front of the window.

I guess this means we don't have to worry about the massive meteor that will strike the earth in 2029. Whew! That's a relief.

70 posted on 09/20/2005 6:15:48 AM PDT by Louis Foxwell (THIS IS WAR AND I MEAN TO WIN IT.)
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To: roaddog727
I think you're on to something here. Apparently this whole situation was all thought up by Karl-of-the-Rove To get president Bush to declare a state of world emergency, forcing the UN to contract Halliburton to save the world at a cost of Bazillions of dollars thereby lining the pockets of all of us Evil republicans further leading to additional capitalist repression of the third world (as well as the remainder of the 2nd and industrialized nations) How's that?

NASA Planning Return to Moon Within 13 Years NY Times ^ | September 20, 2005 | WARREN E. LEARY

They'd better hurry.

71 posted on 09/20/2005 6:15:50 AM PDT by COUNTrecount
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To: dfwgator

Oh Goody, now I won't have to suffer through any more Detroit Lions seasons of futility.
---
I calculate you have eight more to go after the current one.


72 posted on 09/20/2005 6:15:59 AM PDT by Cheburashka
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To: SuziQ

darn, I was hoping for the Doomsday Machine.


73 posted on 09/20/2005 6:16:26 AM PDT by isom35
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To: vannrox
"Americans shouldn't panic until all the facts are in."

LOL

74 posted on 09/20/2005 6:16:53 AM PDT by Zuben Elgenubi
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To: roaddog727

Also,we could add the headlines "Poor, women and minorities hardest hit!"

LOL


75 posted on 09/20/2005 6:18:08 AM PDT by 2001convSVT
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To: vannrox
Well, this puts the kibosh on Bin Ladin's plan to destroy western civilization by the year 2020.

Thank God, I was worried.
76 posted on 09/20/2005 6:19:59 AM PDT by Cheburashka
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To: vannrox

77 posted on 09/20/2005 6:21:09 AM PDT by Dallas59 (“You love life, while we love death.” - Al-Qaeda / Democratic Party)
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To: vannrox

...a mysterious mass they've dubbed a "chaos cloud"...

78 posted on 09/20/2005 6:22:28 AM PDT by Oldeconomybuyer (The democRATS are near the tipping point.)
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To: vannrox

I wonder when Joe Farah and WorldNUTDaily will pick this up...

probably soon...


79 posted on 09/20/2005 6:22:58 AM PDT by MikefromOhio (Hey Fox News, MORE MOLLY, LESS Greta van Talksoutthesideofhermouth)
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To: numberonepal
Some scientists say mankind's best hope would be to build a "space ark" and hightail it to the Andromeda Galaxy, 2.1 million light-years away.

Shotgun! Called it!

Fine, you can have shotgun ... I just ain't sittin' on the hump in the middle of the back seat.

80 posted on 09/20/2005 6:23:07 AM PDT by tx_eggman (If we had some eggs we could have bacon and eggs .... if we had some bacon.)
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