Mensa's New Words for 2005 (humor)

e-mail to PA Times | 9/12/05 | unknown

[pissant]

The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing of one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are the 2005 winners:

1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an a**hole.

3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

12. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

13. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

14. Glibido: All talk and no action.

15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

[Conspiracy Guy]

Thanks

[PaulaB]

Do you know I meant to add you last Friday when we were laughing about who a Freeper reminded us of and I stole your pic/sign

adding now...adding now....

[Conspiracy Guy]

LOL. Yea !

[PaulaB]

But it's the ultimate honor to even be considered. (Psst...I sent her a check, it worked)

**LOL**
of course money always works..I am a female after all. ;)

[Conspiracy Guy]

I am humbled by this honor. I'd like to thank pissant for the support and PaulaB for the approval. I'd like to thank my mom for teaching me to be humbled when honored and I'd like to thank Ray Nagin for showing his true motives by moving his family to Dallas.

Thank you all

[Mr. Jeeves]

Guitard: Moron who thinks his future lies in playing 32nd-note ladder riffs and grimacing.

Hey, I used to resemble that remark! ;)

[Conspiracy Guy]

Money, diamonds, and roses. In no particular order.

[pissant]

YES....YOU....ARE

[PaulaB]

Money, diamonds, and roses. In no particular order

Both of you were taught well....I am very impressed

LOL ;)

[Conspiracy Guy]

Freeper Laura Earl taught me everything I know.

[PaulaB]

You have a very beautiful wife.. now I understand why you understand

**LOL**

I think my hubby may post the same thing on here..of course he is well versed in the

"Behind every man is a great woman" theory!!!

[Conspiracy Guy]

Laura Earl is a beauty all the way through. She is my best friend. I hope she doesn't read this.

[pissant]

I always thought it was "under every great man's thumb..."

;o)

[PaulaB]

no sweetie...you thought wrong ;)

[pissant]

Actually not. But that's why Baskin Robbins makes 31 flavors! ;o)

[Laura Earl]

BAH!

[Conspiracy Guy]

Hello sweety

[Laura Earl]

Hi shmoopie!

[pointsal]

Good post...still smiling.

Thanks

[Conspiracy Guy]

schmoopie?