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VANITY--The chili contest: (Warning--extremely funny!)
e-mailed story | 8-17-05

Posted on 08/18/2005 11:21:44 AM PDT by meandog

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To: Jersey Republican Biker Chick

Trust me ~ old curmudgeons are always right. >:-}


81 posted on 08/18/2005 1:11:52 PM PDT by blackie (Be Well~Be Armed~Be Safe~Molon Labe!)
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To: DeFault User

I'm in Rocky Mount. You can't get real hot food here; the closest they get is the cayenne in the vinegar-based barbecue.


82 posted on 08/18/2005 1:13:28 PM PDT by Oberon (What does it take to make government shrink?)
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To: blackie
"Trust me ~ old curmudgeons are always right. >:-}"

I'll take you word for it. I am 35 so I do not think I qualify, yet.

83 posted on 08/18/2005 1:14:38 PM PDT by Jersey Republican Biker Chick (People too weak to follow their own dreams, will always find a way to discourage yours.)
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To: Jersey Republican Biker Chick

I've got grandkids almost as old as you. :)


84 posted on 08/18/2005 1:22:35 PM PDT by blackie (Be Well~Be Armed~Be Safe~Molon Labe!)
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To: meandog

LOL! I've seen it before but it is really funny. Thanks for posting it.


85 posted on 08/18/2005 1:31:11 PM PDT by proud American in Canada
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To: advance_copy
BTW, Tabasco is the ONLY hot sauce. Forget all the rest, they are just posers. Tabasco, Tabasco, Tabasco

You got that right, but have you tried the Habenero Tabasco Sauce???

Ohhh yeahhhh......

86 posted on 08/18/2005 1:49:34 PM PDT by Responsibility1st (Figure out what you would die for...then live for it. -Anne Rivers Siddons)
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To: Oberon
Are those
87 posted on 08/18/2005 2:16:19 PM PDT by Dashing Dasher (Why do they keep PINGING me to these weird threads? I have no idea!!!)
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To: meandog

I make chili for Vikings games. Everyone claims its far too hot, but they line up for seconds and thirds everytime, and ask me how I make it. The stuff is HOT. I generally make a mild version when I have company that hasn't been warned, though.


88 posted on 08/18/2005 2:24:09 PM PDT by SoDak
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To: Dashing Dasher
Well, some say they're the same. I know them as


89 posted on 08/18/2005 4:06:59 PM PDT by Oberon (What does it take to make government shrink?)
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To: advance_copy
Tabasco is the ONLY hot sauce.

Well, I almost agree with you. Have you tasted Dave's Insanity Sauce? Now that's some tasty HOT.


90 posted on 08/18/2005 4:40:03 PM PDT by glock rocks (Let's light this candle.)
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To: ChefKeith; Squantos; Eaker

see any favorites here? (I see several)...

http://www.sweatnspice.com/heat.php?heat=4


91 posted on 08/18/2005 4:48:08 PM PDT by glock rocks (Let's light this candle.)
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To: glock rocks

$300 a bottle!!!

Gonna have to go back later with the highspeed connection takes to long on the cell phone hookup.


92 posted on 08/18/2005 4:54:32 PM PDT by ChefKeith (If Diplomacy worked, then we would be sitting here talking.)
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To: meandog; Cagey; Larry Lucido

Roll-on-the-floor-funny! Great humor post. Best in a long time!


93 posted on 08/18/2005 5:01:36 PM PDT by MotleyGirl70
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To: MotleyGirl70

When I got to the "snow cone" line, I about lost it. Too funny.


94 posted on 08/18/2005 5:18:07 PM PDT by Cagey (Scrapple is not for vegetarians, those who keep kosher, or those with weak stomachs)
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To: glock rocks; Squantos

I have tasted many. The "hot" doesn't bother me but the lack of flavor does.

I'll stick with Tabasco unless Squantos buys me some of the $300.00 stuff for Christmas!!


95 posted on 08/18/2005 5:32:45 PM PDT by Eaker (My Wife Rocks!)
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To: Eaker

If you like the flavor of habanero peppers (yah, who but Texans can taste anything in the nanosecond before it burns a hole in the roof of yer mouth and starts pursuing yer brain), I like Melinda's XXXXtra Reserve on burritos.

I like Tobasco on most of the things that just need a kick, you know, scrambled eggs, soups, chilis and stuff, and anything cooked at camp.


96 posted on 08/18/2005 5:57:10 PM PDT by glock rocks (Let's light this candle.)
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To: Eaker

http://www.sweatnspice.com/proddetail.php?prod=500&cat=13

One thing.....I need a pic of ya doing a shooter of this stuff and it's yers little buddy !!

A loud, blustery Texan came down the aisle of the plane and plunked himself down in the seat next to young Billy. Every passenger seated nearby gave silent thanks that the odious Texan had not been assigned a seat next to them. After making himself comfortable, the Texan looked at the youthful passenger in the next seat and barked loudly, "Hey, there, young fella! Let's talk!"

Young Billy, who had been reading his book, closed it slowly and said to the obnoxious Texan in a quiet, tentative voice, "What would you like to discuss, sir?"

"Oh, I don't know," boomed the self-confident Texan. "How about nuclear power?" he suggested, hoping to overwhelm the youngster.

"Okay," agreed Billy softly. "That would be an interesting topic. But, let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow and a deer all consume grass. They have exactly the same diet. Yet, a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that happens?"

The previously loud mouthed Texan's perplexed face clouded with deep thought as he commented quietly, "Jeez, boy, I have no idea!"

"Well, then," asked young Billy, as he turned to stare at the Texan, "how is it that you feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't even know shit?"


97 posted on 08/18/2005 10:05:22 PM PDT by Squantos (Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet. ©)
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To: glock rocks

You got that right! I have a neighbor that drives over to Alabama from time to time and picks me up a bottle. That is some hot stuff!

Says on the bottle... Great cooking ingredient for sauces, soups and stews. Also, strips waxed floors and removes driveway grease stains.

WARNING: Use this product one drop at a time. Keep away from eyes, pets and children. Not for people with heart or respiratory problems.


98 posted on 08/19/2005 1:30:11 AM PDT by loboinok (Gun Control is hitting what you aim at!)
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To: Petronski; meandog; cyborg; arasina; Miss Behave; GipperGal; martin_fierro; Constitution Day
I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain.

LOL! I love hot, hot food. Pain is the flavor! (These might be too hot for me...)

99 posted on 08/19/2005 7:18:57 AM PDT by fortunecookie
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To: meandog

Bookmarked for reading again and again. Thanks!


100 posted on 08/19/2005 10:45:30 AM PDT by Carolinamom (Life is a journey, not a destination.)
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