Gal With Green Baby Says She Was Raped By A Leprechaun

world weekly news ^ | Jul 12 '05 (Not Previously Posted) | JENNIFER HIGHTOWER

[Rebelbase]

DOCTORS in Mallow, Ireland, are puzzled by the birth of a green baby. But single mom Bridget O'Leary, 26, says there's a very simple explanation -- she claims she was raped by a leprechaun.

"He had his way with me, he did," says the attractive barmaid. "He got me drunk and slipped me his little green shamrock."

By all accounts O'Leary has a sterling reputation as a hardworking, upstanding individual.

"Bridget is a fine lass, and no mistake," says Tom Shaughnessey, 44, the owner of the Brick and the Rose Pub where O'Leary works. "I've never known her to lie or make up stories.

"According to legend around these parts, leprechauns can be horny little buggers. And Bridget, with her shapely legs, perfectly rounded fanny, and large, firm bosoms. . . well, it's easy ......

[Slings and Arrows]

And in a related article ... "Irish Cop Captures Leprechaun"

I can't wait to see that police lineup. Or perp walk.

[ZULU]

I haven't seen any in Ireland, but I have seen a lot in bars - especially when I was leaving.

[RckyRaCoCo]

Just think, if she castrated him she'd get three wishes.

[Slings and Arrows]

We have experts at identifying shamrocks, you know.

[doodad]

Shouldn't it be shilleleah (sp)? Seems like girls have the shamrocks to me, but I am part Scot as well as Irish and that may be haggisin my thoughts.

[Slings and Arrows]

The genius of the free market is that where there is a buyer, there will be a seller.

[Rebelbase]

I thought this might be the perp, but he looks a bit light in the loafers to me:

[libs_kma]

Is that a high volume ping list? Just curious...

[Right Wing Professor]

Could be because you've got a little shamrock.

Yes, but I've got a very big shillelagh.

[Darksheare]

I haven't known anyone named 'Bridget' in a long time.

[NathanR]

I guess you have never heard of a coracle, have you?

Hint: It is a boat, it uses oars, and you can cross the Irish Channel in it.

[MeanWestTexan]

"Well, actually, I'm not black, you see."

So it's kinda like Oprah who claims to be a Zulu, but is really a hotentot. But not exactly.

[small voice in the wilderness]

I can't wait to see the Court TV televised trial. "Bridget vs. Paternity Denying Leprechaun." Maybe Robert Reichhhhhhhhh can be a contributing commentator.

[NathanR]

That did not come off exactly the way I wanted.

[Hi Heels]

Leprechauns come in black....

[Calpernia]

Rebelbase forgot to post a picture of the kid.

[Slings and Arrows]

If I were the leprechaun, I'd get a DNA test. Maybe the kid's just green because he saw Michael Moore eating.

[Hi Heels]

This is amazing. I'm Jose' Mendoza Garcia Chong, the Russian Ballet Dancer.<

[PatrickHenry]

Will you please be good enough to add my name?

Done. You're obviously qualified to handle this material.

[Slings and Arrows]

Barney? NOOOOOOOO!!!!!