*** OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD - Extra Super-Special STAR WARS Edition! ***

6/3/05 | TheBigB

[TheBigB]

YAHOOOOOO! It's FRIIIIIIDAAAAAY! Today, in honor of REVENGE OF THE SITH (which I ain't seen yet, but am gonna), we proudly present the TOP 10 COOLEST THINGS IN THE STAR WARS UNIVERSE...

10. The Imperial Walkers Who wouldn't sh** a brick watching one of these things coming over the horizon?

9. R2D2 and Chewie’s 3D chess game with the lil' monsters "He made a fair move. Screaming about it won't help."

8. Red Three’s cheesy porn ‘stache goes without saying.

7. Jabba’s floating party barge Say what you will about the man; he knew how to travel in style

6. The Millennium Falcon "She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid."

5. Cloud City Unles you got drunk and actually fell over the side. Which would suck.

4. Leia's gold bikini Jabba also had exceptionally good taste in swimwear

3. Natalie Portman's tummy

2. Yoda The most ass-kickingest muppet this side of Sam the American Eagle!

Aaaaaaand Number One...

1. Darth Vader The biggest, baddest, most scariest This-is-the-way-we-do-it-on-the-Death Star, beeyotch, badaaassssss...

[Fierce Allegiance]

I am taller and I wear a 44 Double D bra, other than that....OK. I kinda meant when you were 6 like the kid in the pic. Thanks for the info, though.

[najida]

No, geezer,
My "Freddy the Freeloader" brain cells were fried from too many margaritas.

[The_Victor]

I didn't realize that "American Pie" was a tribute to Buddy Holly, although I loved, and still love, the song.

Ain't FR great, even the Silliness Thread can educate.

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

Oh, oops. when i was 6, I looked sorta like that. I did not have curly hair though.

Oh, I got the DD's the old fashioned way, I grew them!

[peacebaby]

you did better than this geezer. my brain's fried, but it wasn't the margarettas. :~)

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

"my brain's fried, but it wasn't the margarettas."

Shhh, the feds are listening.

[pissant]

You did it! You can retire for the weekend with a smile on your face!

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

Still up, I was sure it was going to get the AXE! Oh yeah, i can smile all weekend long!!

[fredhead]

Here's some bumper stickers I have seen:

Visualize...Whirlled Peas

Visualize...Using your turn signal

The closer you get...The slower I go

and my favorite -

Auntie Em,
Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog
Love Dorothy

[day10]

14 for 15 - missed the Lone Ranger question! Arrgh! BTW, age 42 but I refuse to be "mature".

[pissant]

and be sure to take the advice in that post to! That'll put a smile on MY face!

[Fierce Allegiance]

The best bumper sticker ever:

WORK SUCKS

[F.J. Mitchell]

I loved her because she perfected the naughty but nice form of entertainment and could tiptoe right along the edge without once going over.

I enjoyed those quotes of hers, thanks for posting them

[peacebaby]

for a bumper sticker I always liked:

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk!

[Fierce Allegiance]

Last week I had some time on my hands and some extra cash lying around, so I went & bought me a new plane. Look at this friggin warrantee I have to fill out:

Subject: McDonnell-Douglas warranty
This was allegedly posted very briefly on the McDonnell Douglas Website by an employee there who obviously has a sense of humor. The company, of course, does not have a sense of humor, and made the web department take it down immediately (for once, the 'IMPORTANT' note at the end is worth a read too....)

---

Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop new products that best meet your needs and desires.
1. Title [_] Mr.
[_] Mrs.
[_] Ms.
[_] Miss
[_] Lt.
[_] Gen.
[_] Comrade
[_] Classified
[_] Other
First Name: .
Initial: .
Last Name:..............................................
Password: . (max. 8 char)
Code Name:..............................................
Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: .
2. Which model of aircraft did you purchase?
[_] F-14 Tomcat
[_] F-15 Eagle
[_] F-16 Falcon
[_] F-117A Stealth
[_] Classified
3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day):
......./......./......
4. Serial Number: .........................................
5. Please indicate where this product was purchased:
[_] Received as gift / aid package
[_] Catalogue / showroom
[_] Independent arms broker
[_] Mail order
[_] Discount store
[_] Government surplus
[_] Classified
6. Please indicate how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product you have just purchased:
[_] Heard loud noise, looked up
[_] Store display
[_] Espionage
[_] Recommended by friend / relative / ally
[_] Political lobbying by manufacturer
[_] Was attacked by one
7. Please indicate the three (3) factors that most influenced your decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product:
[_] Style / appearance
[_] Speed / manoeuvrability
[_] Price / value
[_] Comfort / convenience
[_] Kickback / bribe
[_] Recommended by salesperson
[_] McDonnell Douglas reputation
[_] Advanced Weapons Systems
[_] Backroom politics
[_] Negative experience opposing one in combat
8. Please indicate the location(s) where this product will be used:
[_] North America
[_] Iraq
[_] Iraq
[_] Aircraft carrier
[_] Iraq
[_] Europe
[_] Iraq
[_] Middle East (not Iraq)
[_] Iraq
[_] Africa
[_] Iraq
[_] Asia / Far East
[_] Iraq
[_] Misc. Third World countries
[_] Iraq
[_] Classified
[_] Iraq
9. Please indicate the products that you currently own or intend to purchase in the near future:
[_] Color TV
[_] VCR
[_] ICBM
[_] Killer Satellite
[_] CD Player
[_] Air-to-Air Missile
[_] Space Shuttle
[_] Home Computer
[_] Nuclear Weapon
10. How would you describe yourself or your organization? (Indicate all that apply:)
[_] Communist / Socialist
[_] Terrorist
[_] Crazed
[_] Neutral
[_] Democratic
[_] Dictatorship
[_] Corrupt
[_] Primitive / Tribal
11. How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product?
[_] Deficit spending
[_] Cash
[_] Suitcases of cocaine
[_] Oil revenues
[_] Personal check
[_] Credit card
[_] Ransom money
[_] Traveller's check
12. Your occupation:
[_] Homemaker
[_] Sales / marketing
[_] Revolutionary
[_] Clerical
[_] Mercenary
[_] Tyrant
[_] Middle management
[_] Eccentric billionaire
[_] Defense Minister / General
[_] Retired
[_] Student
13. To help us better understand our customers, please indicate the interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy participating on a regular basis:
[_] Golf
[_] Boating / sailing
[_] Sabotage
[_] Running / jogging
[_] Propaganda / misinformation
[_] Destabilization / overthrow
[_] Default on loans
[_] Gardening
[_] Crafts
[_] Black market / smuggling
[_] Collectibles / collections
[_] Watching sports on TV
[_] Wines
[_] Interrogation / torture
[_] Household pets
[_] Crushing rebellions
[_] Espionage / reconnaissance
[_] Fashion clothing
[_] Border disputes
[_] Mutually Assured Destruction
Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell Douglas serve you better in the future - as well as allowing you to receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and mysterious consortia. As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be registered to win a brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes!
Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to: McDONNELL DOUGLAS CORPORATION Marketing Department Military Aerospace Division

[Fierce Allegiance]

I saw one of those on a car on a sidewalk after it ran over 3 people & a guy on a bike at one of those cutesy Tratoria's in boston. The news crew & cops thought it was a hillarious.

[fredhead]

I always heard that it was a tribute to all three musicians who died in that fateful plane crash, Buddy Holly, The Big Bopper, and Richie Valens.

[peacebaby]

that's terrible.

i've always wanted a bumper sticker that said:

If you can read this, GET OFF MY ASS!

[beyond the sea]

Looks more like a fire watcher than a lumberjack, though.

Btw, what's a "fire watcher"?

Nah, this guy is lookin' good to me.

The photographer did the same silly distortional thing that was done on Annie Coulter on TIME and Bill HummerBoy Clinton on ESQUIRE. This guy actually was a long distance swimmer and a baseball player....... but he still won't speak to Wesley Clark.

;-)

[Fierce Allegiance]

A tattoo or bumper sticker?