How About Some Original Limericks ?

05/09/05 | vanity

[genefromjersey]

To lighten up our week (I've been up to my neck in deadly serious stuff !),I propose a thread devoted to original limericks.

Nothing obscene,mind you,but you have to make them up on the spot.A little "juvenile" humor - such as the following - is okay.

Should there be a prize? Maybe an autographed full-length photo of The Hero of Chappaquiddick in a bathing suit?

(Well,okay: maybe not !)

Without further ado, I present:

GRANNY FRANNIE

Frannie the flatulent granny
Once filled every nook,niche,and cranny
Of her church with such vapors
It made all the papers.
"Where's everyone gone?",cried old Frannie.

[CitizenM]

My 'puter capabilities don’t include,
Reception from your web cam, dude.
Thank goodness! I'm so glad,
'Cause I think t’would be bad
To see Freeper PatrickHenry in the nude!

[Dashing Dasher]

I've chosen to take this as a compliment.

Pissant knows better than to pi** me off!

;-)

[Pharmboy]

A pansy who lived in Khartoum
Took a lesbian up to his room;
And they argued all night
Over who had the right
To do what of which
And to whom.

[Dashing Dasher]

any material from the Rachel Corrie poetry thread

I heard it was flat!

[F16Fighter]

Heh!

[Charles Henrickson]

As no target's outsmartin' the arrow,
No fun thread gets by martin_fierro.
Never seen such a thing,
And so here with a zing
Comes a ping from our gay caballero!

[martin_fierro]

Comes a ping from our gay caballero!

I PEG your bardon...?

[Charles Henrickson]

Happy, I meant. :-)

[Rakkasan1]

the once was man named DeLay
the dims thought they'd get their way
use the nuclear option, put the dims up for adoption
to compromise now would be gay.

[martin_fierro]

No problemo.

The ruffles confuse people.

[Charles Henrickson]

[real saxophonist]

Lazamataz, Lazamataz...
Lazamataz Lazamataz Lazamataz.
Lazamataz, Lazamataz
Lazamataz Lazamataz
Lazamataz Lazamataz Lazamataz!

[real saxophonist]

If you don't get that, go watch Being John Malkovich.

Which I heard was originally going to be Being Willem Dafoe, but Willem said he wasn't going to be an obscure reference on Free Republic years later, so Malkovich got the part.

[Charles Henrickson]

BTW, Robert Preston wasn't in real life, he just played one in one movie.

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

Here's a page with a whole bunch of politically flavored limericks!
All written by Freeper "dionysus".

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

My personal favorite:

The impeccably natty Dan Rather
Shaves close ‘fore the camera-folks gather
But when his image came back
From his chat in Iraq
The stuff ‘round his mouth wasn’t lather.

[supercat]

There once was a man from Nantucket...

...who kept all his cash in a bucket.
      But his daughter Nan
      ran away with her man.
And as for the bucket, Nantucket.

[beyond the sea]

There once was a runaway bride

Said she must run away and hide

But there was no blue van

No Hispanic man

Now no one is on her side

[beyond the sea]

ROFL

[genefromjersey]

A poster by the name of Alisa
Was no kin to sweet Mother Theresa;
And would rail in "The Blogs"
About Damn Bloody Wogs
While munching an anchovy pizza.

(best i could do on short notice,said ogden.i have to go fix my nash.)