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The Beer Dictionary (Very Important)
Beer Church ^ | 5/2005 | staff

Posted on 05/09/2005 1:48:42 PM PDT by pissant

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To: pissant

LMAO!


61 posted on 05/09/2005 3:32:45 PM PDT by tiredoflaundry (Some stories have more spin cycles than my Kenmore washer!)
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To: pissant

Hittin the 2 AM lottery .. use your imagination ...


62 posted on 05/09/2005 3:32:48 PM PDT by clamper1797 (To say that there is no difference between a liberal and a jackass ... wrongs the jackass)
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To: Argh; pissant
That picture looks VERY familiar.

It should. I asked you three times that night to put down my damn Vintage Merlot lipstick.
63 posted on 05/09/2005 3:34:39 PM PDT by Xenalyte (I am at Dr. Venture's lab to right that which is wrong and to repair the torn curtain of time itself)
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To: pissant; colorcountry
Absolutely true story.

When I was in high school, a buddy of mine - we'll call him Dave - had a couple of fun cousins, Juan and Dario, who also went to school with us.

One day in the band hall, Dave bet 'em that neither would put a whole can of snuff in his mouth. Cousin Dario took the bet and the can, and within about 30 seconds had a mouthful. The can was empty, and we were about to pronounce him the winner, when in walked the band director.

Cousin Dario knew a bust when he saw one, so he did what any well-bred right-thinking 17-year-old Houston boy would do . . . he took one for the team and swallowed the whole damn can of dip.
64 posted on 05/09/2005 3:38:48 PM PDT by Xenalyte (I am at Dr. Venture's lab to right that which is wrong and to repair the torn curtain of time itself)
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To: Xenalyte; Argh

I just KNOW you were talking to Argh, not me!


65 posted on 05/09/2005 3:40:11 PM PDT by pissant (Dead Terrorists are a good thing)
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To: Poser

Driving the porcelain bus
Yelling at your shoes
Praying to the porcelain god
Launch Lunch
Toss Cookies


66 posted on 05/09/2005 3:41:02 PM PDT by danno3150
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To: pissant; Argh

Oh, yeah.

Sorry for the confusion . . . you can wear the Vintage Merlot any time you like. You're an Autumn. Argh, being a Spring, looks atrocious in the warm colors.


67 posted on 05/09/2005 3:41:34 PM PDT by Xenalyte (I am at Dr. Venture's lab to right that which is wrong and to repair the torn curtain of time itself)
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To: clamper1797

"Hittin the 2 AM lottery .."
______________________________________
I bartended for many years. One of the fringe benefits was getting to cherry pick from the pool of lottery prizes!


68 posted on 05/09/2005 3:42:22 PM PDT by pissant (Dead Terrorists are a good thing)
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To: R. Scott

"AH! The Bad Ole Daze!"
____________________________________________
You mean they are over??


69 posted on 05/09/2005 3:42:58 PM PDT by pissant (Dead Terrorists are a good thing)
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To: Xenalyte

Wow. I take it Dario is no longer with us.


70 posted on 05/09/2005 3:44:02 PM PDT by pissant (Dead Terrorists are a good thing)
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To: pissant

Oh, he lived to tell, all right . . . last time I heard from Dave, Dario was a dentist and Juan an ob/gyn.

Juan had a wooden leg from the knee down, and when he fancied a new chica, he'd test the waters by giving her a dozen roses in his prosthetic leg.


71 posted on 05/09/2005 3:46:46 PM PDT by Xenalyte (I am at Dr. Venture's lab to right that which is wrong and to repair the torn curtain of time itself)
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To: Xenalyte

an OB/GYN? I think he should be dating men.


72 posted on 05/09/2005 3:49:20 PM PDT by pissant (Dead Terrorists are a good thing)
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To: pissant

Nah, Juan and Dario and Dave are all proud heteros. I think they all have kids, and at least two of the three are married right now.


73 posted on 05/09/2005 3:52:09 PM PDT by Xenalyte (I am at Dr. Venture's lab to right that which is wrong and to repair the torn curtain of time itself)
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To: Brad's Gramma; Gabz

bonk.


74 posted on 05/09/2005 3:52:16 PM PDT by glock rocks (For the love of all that's good and decent, don't try this at home)
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To: glock rocks
Driving by brail - Using the sound and feel of the road turtles to keep your car on the highway.

WHOO HOOOO!!!!!!!

75 posted on 05/09/2005 3:56:35 PM PDT by Brad’s Gramma (Yo! Cowboy! I'm praying for a LoganMiracle! It CAN happen!!!!)
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To: Xenalyte; pissant

But it tastes so damn good! Er, I mean, that wasn't me, it must have been some other freeper named Argh.


76 posted on 05/09/2005 4:00:44 PM PDT by Argh
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To: pissant
Party till dawn
Sleep till three
Oh good lord
Whadda I do to me

Can't find my wallet
can't find my keys
getting to the bathroom
crawling on my knees

So I roll on over
To see who's there
400 lbs
and orange hair

Face like a bad road
Built like a truck
Good gosh almighty
I musta been drunk

I wrote this on the marning after my 40th B-day party
There's several more verses and a couple in-between .. but you get the idea

77 posted on 05/09/2005 4:46:04 PM PDT by clamper1797 (To say that there is no difference between a liberal and a jackass ... wrongs the jackass)
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To: pissant

They are for me. I've calmed down a lot lately.


78 posted on 05/09/2005 4:46:14 PM PDT by R. Scott (Humanity i love you because when you're hard up you pawn your Intelligence to buy a drink.)
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To: clamper1797

You're the next John Donne, far as I can tell....


79 posted on 05/09/2005 5:01:03 PM PDT by pissant (Dead Terrorists are a good thing)
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To: R. Scott

I've cut down to maybe once a year when it comes to imbibing excessively. Of course, lotsa practice make expensive to get me snockered.


80 posted on 05/09/2005 5:02:24 PM PDT by pissant (Dead Terrorists are a good thing)
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