Why It's Great to be a Woman

JokesOnline ^ | 12/04 | staff

[pissant]

We got off the Titanic first.

We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.

We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central figure in a computer game.

Taxis stop for us.

We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

No fashion faux pas we make could ever rival The Speedo.

We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.

If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her butt.

We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.

We have the ability to dress ourselves.

We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.

There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.

We'll never regret piercing our ears.

We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

[pissant]

I shall take that under advisement!

[bert]

If you are 25 and unmarried you are a spinster.

[pissant]

Good. I'll tell my wife, with regards from najida. Thanks

[firebrand]

Every time I think men have most of the advantages in life, I remind myself that the opposite sex for them is women.

[mike182d]

Check out this link from MIT. I think it definitely solve this problem once and for all: http://web.mit.edu/mlcohen/www/history.html

[pissant]

Is that you Ann Coulter???

[firebrand]

Greatest compliment I ever got.

[Hi Heels]

If you are over 50 and unmarried, you are intelligent.

[Hi Heels]

Link from "MATT". I'm speechless.

[pissant]

and if you are 25 thru 50, unmarried and conservative, you should be in HIGH DEMAND

[teenyelliott]

Fashion sense, and it has nothing to do with how old the shoes are or how much they cost. Certain kinds of people buy certain kinds of shoes. You can tell everything you need to know about a person by their shoes.

Do you need a reading? What kind of shoes do you have on? (Not that I expect a serious answer from Sir Pissant.)

[najida]

LOL!

[Yo-Yo]

If you are over 50 and unmarried, you are intelligent.

or too broke from the alimony to afford a girlfriend...

[Hi Heels]

hmmm... I'll give one for the team. Lace up the front roman-esque sandals in brown suede, sling back with an inch heel.

[pissant]

In all honesty, I'm just wearing my socks as we speak. But I wore my New Balance 475 trail running shoes into the office, if that helps....

[Hi Heels]

I IS the girl. And I don't get no alimony.

[teenyelliott]

20.00 - Good thing. Not trying to impress anyone, not superficial, frugal. All good things, and has nothing to do with what you make.

mud - You obviously do something worthwhile, or at least interesting, with your time. Just don't track it into my house. :)

untied - You are a slob, perhaps a little careless in personality, but not clumsy, otherwise you would not take the chance of tripping on them.

falling apart - You have better things to do with your time than shop for shoes, plus you just don't care. Not necessarily a bad thing.

All of the above would apply if I met you in a bar. If you wore these shoes to a job interview, I would simply assume you wanted your unemployment sheet signed.

[DeFault User]

No fashion faux pas we make could ever rival The Speedo.

Oh, I don't know about that. Some of the atrocities I've seen in Spandex and stretch pants gotta be right up there in contention.

[samiam1972]

I am sitting here in socks waiting for the temperature to rise just a little more so I can shed the socks and put on my flip-flops. What does that say about me? ;-)

[pissant]

Yeah. but the gals getta wear these fine undies

http://www.backlesslingerie.com/