[Unknown Freeper]

Here's something from the great writers of our time...

[McGavin999]

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

These are all funny, but this one just about killed me!

[pigsmith]

Excellent!

I haven't had a good laugh in way-too-long.

[cripplecreek]

"3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it."


I'm assuming there was a word count requirement on this essay.

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

I love this one.

20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.

In two short sentences Phil has been introduced and a mental picture has been formed. Brilliant!

[cowboyway]

There's some potential Dan Rather's in this bunch.

[cripplecreek]

"24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools."


It appears that the Simpsons is still polpular in the UK.

[HuntsvilleTxVeteran]

Thank you, I needed a chuckle this morning.

[Oztrich Boy]

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

Brilliant

[thoughtomator]

It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.

Surely a Pulitzer, or at least a NYTimes editorial position, is in this kid's future.

[sierrahome]

I'd say thanks for the chuckle but I think I may be the "Phil" mentioned in #20

[ozarkgirl]

I saw on a different post, someone has already snatched #20 as their new tagline.

It was pretty funny, I read this and then read the Ebola article and saw his tag line. LOL

[Griptilian]

bump

[elfman2]

good stuff!

[uncitizen]

It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.

No doubt the school called Child Protective Services in on this one.

[didi]

I'm still laughing. I love the the boat in the pond, ballerina and brother in law. But I think my favorite is the simple:

Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

Great! I see mischief and great wit. There is hope for the future after all.

[beaubazzoo]

"18. Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut."

I rise in defence of grandfathers everywhere.

[Professional Engineer]

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

Now there's a vivid description!

[I_saw_the_light]

Hilarious.
but you have to admit, they are creative.

[Samwise]

Bumpity bump