Advice for Spring Break trip (ZOT!!! Girls laugh at me, cuz I'm a troll-school dropout.)

Hal I. Tosis, as told to Reddy Kilozot

[Yak breath]

Hello fellow conservatives

I am a junior at the University of North Carolina and I am planning on going to Cancun for spring break. I would just like to have some good advice on how to avoid the evils of spring break while enjoying spring break. I know this is very hard to do as it will be tough to control myself as I see a hole bunch of hot girls walking around in their little bikinis drinking cornonas and margritias. The though of that makes me crazy. As a good conservative I have never kissed a girl and won’t until I am married but the sight of their sweet lips will be hard ignore. I will be wearing my WWJD braclet and that should help a little. Also I want to try taquilla because I have heard so much about it and what to see what all the fuss is about. Maybe a few shots won’t be too bad.

While down there I will try to take about doing the right thing and how great it is to support Bush and America. Maybe I will take to some of my Mexican brethren and tell them how great Bush is as well.

Well I hope you guys give me some good advice so I can enjoy myself at my first spring brake all the while remaining true to my upbringing.

[hiredhand]

Get neutered. We raise goats and in fact, "banded" some males today. Since you are at UNC, you're only 30 minutes or so from me. Don't worry. It will only hurt for day or so, and then your nuts will fall off. :-)

[Celtjew Libertarian]

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Sure the wheel is a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.

But without the wheel, we would not have discovered the proper shape of the pizza. Nor would we be able to have the pizza delivered to our homes in 30 minutes or less.

[squirt-gun]

Re # 49

Why is your 6 Yr old son being allowed to watch this specific subject?

Is your seabag full?

[pharmamom]

No, he was downstairs doing 6 y.o. things and he snuck up the stairs to surprise me--and well, he surprised me right at the minute I was reading that post. What's a seabag?

[aculeus]

Can we complain to Troll Central about the poor quality of recent efforts?

[SolidRedState]

I understand that I am required to maintain a full seabag 
at all times while on active duty. All discrepancies noted 
on the seabag inspection above will be corrected within the 
next 2 paydays immediately following the inspection date of 
the top of this form.


http://www.uscg.mil/hq/reserve/Recall/seabag.htm

 

Old seabag >>>     

New seabag>>>

 

Yak Breath>>>

[pharmamom]

LOL. And I'm with you on the tagline thing; there's just too much pressure!

[SolidRedState]

:) Ain't it the truth!

[Fintan]

 

You're gonna need a lot more than a few cornonas and margritias.

[ReeWalker]

Note to Yak breath's parents..GET YOUR MONEY BACK!! Make the little wanker GET A JOB!!!

[squirt-gun]

Re # 64.... What's a seabag?

Naval aviator term for the "Not Quite Right"

[Jimmyclyde]

PING

[Darksheare]

"my first spring brake"

That would be the MIDDLE pedal on your power wheels.

[Thunder90]

[Dead Corpse]

[Ksnavely]

This guy needs to take one of those diversity courses where they teach you not to stereotype (hehe).

[mastercylinder]

[Coop]

ROTFLMAO!!!