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Here's to you, Mrs Robinson (Why are men attracted to older women?)
Ivillage ^ | 3/2/05 | staff

Posted on 03/04/2005 6:05:40 AM PST by pissant

Why are men attracted to older women? Experience, wisdom, confidence and lots of practice in bed, says Vincent Jackson When I was a teenager, my mother's stock response to jokes I made about her advancing years was, 'There's many a good tune played on an old fiddle.' Of course I never really wanted to think about my mother playing a tune of any kind. However, my acne-faced classmates appeared to both understand about fiddles and know what fine melodies could be played on them. Perhaps that's why they'd continually remark: 'phwoar, I'd give yer mum one'!

Men's infatuations with older women start as soon as we're old enough to know what women are. And this curiosity surrounding the potential for pleasure with maturer females stays with us until, well - the day comes when there aren't any women left in the world older than us.

To be frank, men are initially drawn to older women (for our purposes, 'older' means at least 10 years senior) for sex. For example, Ben, a 26-year-old web designer, has been seeing a woman of 43 for nearly a year. She's reasonably affluent - has paid off her mortgage and has a two bedroom flat in North London. She also has a good career, is intellectual, very attractive, and according to Ben, 'the best shag I've ever had.'

Every single bloke I spoke to said sex was the best thing about being in a relationship with an older woman.

I imagine that their female conquests know this is the case. Let's not pull any punches here. Do you think for a minute that a 25-year-old man makes a play for a 40-year-old woman because he's interested in the Habitat crockery she may have accrued over time? Of course not. Older women tend to bring to bed a wealth of experience, confidence and tricks between the sheets that a young woman can only dream of. Show me a man who doesn't find the prospect of an experienced lover an exciting one, and I'll show you a liar

However, being an older woman doesn't necessarily guarantee good sex - if you're no good in bed at 25, who's to say you'll be a fully qualified love-goddess at 40? Yet, older women give the impression that they're better in bed because they're more comfortable with themselves. All those hang-ups about having a slight tummy, stretch marks or the odd spot of cellulite tend to become less important with age. A few of the men I spoke to insisted that they found these flaws attractive - a sign of a body that is real and lived in. As Ben says of his older lover, 'She's much more relaxed about herself and her body than many of the girls my age that I've slept with. She knows that her body is showing slight signs of ageing, but she accepts it and just gets on with life.'

Of course, sex is not the only allure of a younger man, older woman partnership. In fact, it would be easy to question why some men want to date women roughly the same age as their mothers, especially when the spectre of Oedipus looms so large. Ultimately, however, a bloke's motivation doesn't need to subjected to Freudian psychoanalysis. Put simply, mature women are, well, mature - they are older and wiser in their world view, and that's what a young man finds attractive.

By the time a woman reaches her mid-thirties, she's acquired confidence, the art of conversation, her own individual perspective on life and, most importantly, wisdom - a very sexy trait. Older women generally know what they want from life and in love and this can be refreshing after the annoying and frustrating relationship games so many younger women play. Older women also tend to be - well, richer - and sometimes young men get fed up with dining out at Spud-U-Like.

What about me? I've never had the pleasure of dating an older woman, but I'm 28 so there's still time. Since the age of 12 I've had various crushes on older ladies - teachers, family friends, the woman who worked in the video shop, a few non-blood related aunties (slightly dubious territory, I admit), and, just like my old school friends, my mates' mums. But I've never actually taken the plunge. However, I'm sure there's a fiddle out there with my name on it, and when I do get my chance, I'm certain its strings will yield some mighty fine music.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: genderwars; hotties
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To: the OlLine Rebel

I see from your profile you are a mech engineer. What field do you work in. (Being very nosy, I know)


101 posted on 03/04/2005 12:54:15 PM PST by pissant
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To: pissant

That's ironic, cuz I can't tell you. ;-)


102 posted on 03/04/2005 1:01:40 PM PST by the OlLine Rebel (Common sense is an uncommon virtue.)
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To: najida

Well, at my age, all the older men are in walkers or on life support, so it's ONLY younger men for me.


103 posted on 03/04/2005 1:02:08 PM PST by Veto! (Opinions freely dispensed as advice)
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To: pissant

Hope springs eternal for Katie and MoDo....


104 posted on 03/04/2005 1:03:47 PM PST by kittymyrib
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To: Veto!

he he he
Ain't that the truth.


105 posted on 03/04/2005 1:05:02 PM PST by najida (The most wonderful sound in the world is a baby's belly laugh.)
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To: kittymyrib

Isn't Katie shagging Chris Boti (young jazzster). MoDo hasn't had a date in 10 years, and not because of her age...


106 posted on 03/04/2005 1:05:35 PM PST by pissant
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To: the OlLine Rebel

Oh well, at least you're a fellow engineer, so you can't be too bad. ;o}


107 posted on 03/04/2005 1:08:13 PM PST by pissant
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To: najida

Why, yes he does. A lot of them.


108 posted on 03/04/2005 1:24:39 PM PST by Auntbee (Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.)
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To: Veto!

ROTFLOL!
Don't know why "I" am laughing.
Maybe because it's sort of true...lol.


109 posted on 03/04/2005 1:30:17 PM PST by onyx (Henry Kissinger: Asked if SoS Rice calls him, replied, "no never, she doesn't need advice.")
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To: Auntbee

I love your FR name.


110 posted on 03/04/2005 1:45:29 PM PST by ValerieUSA
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To: ValerieUSA

Thanks. My nieces and nephews call me that because my nickname started with a "B".


111 posted on 03/04/2005 1:53:20 PM PST by Auntbee (Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.)
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To: pissant

They don't swell, don't tell, and they're grateful as hell.


112 posted on 03/04/2005 1:56:00 PM PST by Jim Noble
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To: Auntbee

My maiden name was a long one that began with "E" so my friends called my dad, Mr E .... which is mystery.... which has nothing to do with Mrs Robinson.


113 posted on 03/04/2005 1:58:59 PM PST by ValerieUSA
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To: Clemenza

Is the thread dead? I thought it would be a fun Friday night thread... guess I ought to just go out instead.


114 posted on 03/04/2005 2:24:34 PM PST by ValerieUSA
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To: ValerieUSA

I should have waited 'til this afternoon to post it. It might still get some added mileage yet!


115 posted on 03/04/2005 2:32:46 PM PST by pissant
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To: pissant

I'm still wondering ... What is Habitat crockery? Am I supposed to have some?


116 posted on 03/04/2005 3:01:16 PM PST by ValerieUSA
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To: ValerieUSA

Don't know, but it sounds dirty....


117 posted on 03/04/2005 3:06:58 PM PST by pissant
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To: pissant

*L* You must have one of those kind of minds...


118 posted on 03/04/2005 3:16:41 PM PST by ValerieUSA
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To: onyx; pissant

Other not so famous country songs

Top 15 Country Song Titles



15. If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You

14. If The Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me

13 How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?

12. I Liked You Better Before I Got to Know You So Well

11. I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim's Gettin' Better

10. I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dog Fight 'Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win

9. I'll Marry You Tomorrow But Let's Honeymoon Tonight

8. I'm So Miserable Without You It's Like Having You Here

7. If I Had Shot You When I Wanted To I'd Be Out Of Prison By Now

6. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Sure Do Miss Him

5. She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger

4. You're The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly

3. Her Teeth Was Stained But Her Heart Was Pure

2. She's Looking Better After Every Beer

1. I Haven't Gone To Bed With Any Ugly Women, but I've Sure As Hell Woke Up With A Few.


119 posted on 03/04/2005 3:47:30 PM PST by WKB (You can half the good and double the bad people say about themselves.)
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To: WKB

And "All my Ex's Live in Texas"


120 posted on 03/04/2005 3:49:00 PM PST by pissant
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