Posted on 12/03/2004 7:01:43 AM PST by grellis
First, I'd like to ask all of you to say a prayer for one of our moms, backinthefold, whose son broke two foot bones recently. Can we have an update, BITF?
Next...well, I'm not sure where to begin. Earlier this week a thread was run, "A Paradigm Shift in Parenting" (sorry folks, I've forgotten the html for links) in which many of the FFT parents posted comments. The discussion among FReepers on the thread began as a look at the economics of parenting, a topic which we have discussed a number of times in the past. What the discussion turned into was just ugly, on many different levels. A few of the prevailing attitudes seemed to be "I am a stay at home mom so I'm a better parent than you are;" "I homeschool my kids so I'm a better parent than you are;" "I live in an afforable community so I'm a better parent than you are"...one complete (insert expletive here) even had the raw nerve to refer to the adoptive parents of foreign-born children as traitors to America.
What goes on here? Do we realize how hurtful some of our comments are going to be before we post them and have at it anyway, or is it just that we don't think about it? Do we make an effort to try to understand someone's situation before we pass our judgement upon them? Which begs the obvious question: Who are we to judge? I freely admit that I have done this in the past. When a poster gripes about the high cost of living in their community, my first thought is "So move!" Yet, recently, when I had occasion to gripe about the slumlords in my own community, I took great offense when I was told--you guessed it--"So move!" Is there some way that we can be more supportive of the choices of other parents? If that is not possible, could we at least try to be a little more constructive in our criticism?
Is this going to be the first FFT thread in which comments are removed by the mods??!
That is good news the orthopedist thinks the bones in your son's foot are in good positions to heal and it sure sounds like you found a good one if he is looking to minimize the child's pain.
You are not a bad parent, there is a time when all children have to grow out of "Mommy, fix my boo-boo" when there is nothing more than a stubbed toe. Granted this was more than just that, and it was a very hard(hurting) lesson for your son to learn, there are times when an admission to pain is not wrong.
"Judge not, lest ye be judged" is a very good way to live - I wish more people would do so.
That's a hoot! I ran it through Babblefish and it made zero sense! I've been checking for bites with the Rad Trads all day and nada.
I bought Bob a microscope to use with his computer. Intel toys, I think. I got it off Amazon. He is finally using it three years later! Chemistry sets are not what they used to be. You can no longer blow the house up with them or create exotic poisons.
The answer-backing is normal at Jax age. They love to ask you questions and then tell you you are wrong. Just reply with "Well, if you already know, why are you asking me, Missy?" It takes about 100 repetitions but they finally knock it off.
A couple of things that come to mind, regarding the reasons nice people (as opposed to cacopygian epople, whose bowels we bless in parting) will say things that are perceived as attacks.
One is that a person may feel very strongly about a principle, and not think about the real-world application. For example, I feel strongly that government schools are bad for the republic, and I may not make it clear that it doesn't mean I think you're a bad person if your children attend government schools. It's a political or theoretical point; I think you should have a different set of educational choices.
Another reason is that we pretty much all agree that some situations are "sub-optimal," such as young children in full-time daycare. There's not really much argument about that! However, we may not be sufficiently thoughtful of those who may genuinely believe that's the best they can do with what they have to work with, so to speak. There's a difference between "bad situation" and "bad people," but we don't always make the distinction clearly.
Maybe they're on to us!
Amen, my FRiend.
The crack dealers are what drove me to put Jax in private preschool fulltime, once the regular school the other kids in the neighborhood were stored in was out before we left Dover.
Goodness - that is a horrible sentence - but I think you know what I'm trying to say.
They arren't that smart.
It's First Friday ... maybe they're in church.
Now I'm being uncharitable ... I think traditional devotions are great, but only if they make you a more Christlike person.
I imagine they are in church----praying for us. Bless their hearts. ; )
LOL - you give it just the right zing!
Congratulations on your baby! I hope everything is back to normal soon!
I wish I could come and hold her while you do taxes ... I had to give it up when I kept having babies in March/April :-).
Some Freepers seriously lack in couth.
My daughter's teachers have told me the same thing. Each time we have (and both my husband and I usually go) they tell us that we are not the parents they need to see. But every marking period there we are.
It's hard to explain in the environment of the internet the relationship between us, the teachers, and her. They know we are interested and involved and so they tend to go overboard with letting us know what is going on - particularly her transgressions.
What a very beautiful offer. Thank you, Star.
I try very hard not to let them get to me, by avoiding their attacks unless they are directed toward me, or are agrevious toward another.
Do it.
You two are a riot!!!!
Bless both your hearts and bowels..........
(I'm having a hard time typing that without letting out a huge guffaw - but then I would have to explain myself, and I don't think I want to!!!!)
My neighbors granddaughter has had 5 children and is only 20. She gave the third one up for adoption to a lesbian couple here in town.
Meanwhile my husband and I are trying to conceive for 8 years and she is having one every 14 months! I was just a little frustrated about that. Thankfully God saw fit to finally give me one. I think it takes alot to realize that someone else could better provide for a child.
I'm dying here laughing about both your phrases - totally dying with laughter.
If that poster was smart, and I don't believe he is, he would have recognized the incredible *ss-smacking you gave him.
My family is like Grellis'; we didn't get here until the late 1800's. Plus we are illegal since we snuck in from Canada after stowing away on a ship from France.
My husband's family on the other hand has been here since before the Revolution. So I guess the kids count as "real" Americans.
We're a funny bunch! Well, in my case funny-looking, as I tell Hubs.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.