Posted on 08/29/2004 3:37:45 PM PDT by mingusthecat
Mingus Will Urge Cat Events at Future Olympics, but Beijing 2008 Gives Her Paws
ON THE FRONT STEPS, SOMEWHERE IN TEXASWith the 28th Olympic Games set to reach their finale on Sunday with a closing ceremony in Athens, Mingus the Cat today expressed disappointment and concern over the lack of certain important cat competitions during the 2-week event. The opinionated feline vowed to urge the Olympic Committee to include these events in future Olympiads, although she was not planning on attending the Beijing 2008 Olympics and urged other cats to stay home in 2008 as well.
This was my first Olympics, and when I heard they would be an international competition, in my mind I pictured competition between the Siamese; American Shorthairs; Australian Mists; Bombays; British Shorthairs; Egyptian Maus, Persians, Russian Blues, Persians and others!
Mingus, right, who longs to compete in the Olympics, will nonetheless refrain from attending the 2008 Olympics in Beijing.
I think I speak for the international cat community on this issue, and I demand satisfaction, said Mingus, noting that at one point, she saw her humans inexplicably watching an event that consisted of lithe, flexible contestants frolicking about with balls and ribbons on sticks.
Mingus is perplexed as to why Rhythmic Gymnastics, right, is a sactioned Olympic Competition, when her own frolicking and batting about of ribbons and other objects usually just draws scolding at worst or condescending admiration at best.
If whatever that event was can be called a sporting event and included in the Olympics, then that sounds like something I do just for fun, and cats should have been included, she said, noting that she was still perplexed as to why her humans were dedicating precious TV viewing time to watching the event when they either ignore or scold her for frolicking about with various objects.
Mingus list of recommended events for the 2008 Olympics includes:
But, Mingus added, While I hope the International Olympic Committee will seriously consider these events for 2012, I do not plan on going to Beijing in 2008, nor do I recommend that any cats do so. After all, I want cats to compete in the Cat Walk, not the Cat Wok!
meow
Considering what "pussys" many ex-Olympians have become (Carl Lewis), this is not so far-fetched...
I wonder what cat tastes like.
Bet it's like chicken.
Eat more chicken.
Cat's got her tongue head.
d.o.l.
Criminal NUmber 18F
Okay.....that's very scary.
ROFLOL
[Freepmail me to get on or off the Kitty Ping List.]
Added style points for the judges stepping in it when they get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom.
Don't forget Tea Stealing and Subsequent Caffeine Frenzies. (Or is that just my cat?)
By the way, I just heard Bill Clinton tell Geraldo Rivera that "I've been hurt by Slings and Arrows too." Who else did you hurt and why didn't you sell tickets when you hurt Bill Clinton?
I used to be a humor columnist, and I damn well hope I hurt Bill Clinton. I didn't sell tickets because the column was available freely over the web.
(Betcha weren't expecting that answer. ;-) )
Piddy ping.
}:-)4
I have no response but to say that I so envy your talent and your work. By the way, the Mingus the Cat PR department takes "guest writers" on occasion, so feel free.....Just FReepmail to "my PR department" and we'll get it posted to the website, etc.
Did you ever think
When you eat Chinese,
You might be eating
A fat Siamese.
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