Posted on 04/16/2004 6:37:21 PM PDT by Mo1
Sadam Hussin and Osama Ben Laden just heard it on the radio!
That stinks .. hope you're feeling better
I say let Moore keep campaigning for Kerry since he did such a bang up just helping Wes Clark .. LOL
Email joke from Dad inlaw
Subject: a cat story
A cat story
You don't have to own a cat to appreciate this one...
A couple was dressed and ready to go out for the evening. They turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on the phone line, covered their pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard.
They phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and the couple opened the front door to leave their house. The cat they had put out into the yard scoots back into the house.
They don't want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to eat the bird. The wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes inside to get
the cat. The cat runs upstairs, the man in hot pursuit.
Waiting in the cab, the wife doesn't want the driver to know the house will
be empty for the night. She explains to the taxi driver that her husband will be out soon. "He's just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother."
A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab."Sorry I took so long, "he says as they drive away. "Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed.
Had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off so I grabbed her by the neck. Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked. I hauled her fat ass downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!"
The cabdriver hit a parked car...
Dad inlaw sent this one too
Some habits are hard to break *L*
Here's a good fishing story
NBC10.com
Huge Bass Takes Teen On Wild Ride
Teen Has Real Fish Story
POSTED: 7:07 AM EDT June 29, 2004
UPDATED: 7:22 AM EDT June 29, 2004
A relaxing day of fishing ended with a wild ride for a 14-year-old Ocean County angler.
Bobby Capri Jr. of Stafford Township, N.J., was in a 10-foot kayak when he hooked a near-record size striped bass in waters off Surf City on Friday.
The 52-pound, 8-ounce fish came within 5 pounds of the world record of 57 pounds for his age group.
The striper dragged the kayak for about 20 minutes, taking the 115-pound Capri past two jetties and pulling him in circles about a dozen times.
He lugged it aboard by putting his hand through its gill plate.
He then tried to paddle ashore, but the kayak's bow kept tipping.
Capri then pushed his hand up through the gill plate again, jumped out and dragged the fish the final 10 to 15 yards ashore.
OK ... I'm finally of to bed .. here's another one from FIL emails
Happy 4th of July
http://www.njagyouth.org/Liberty_.htm
I'd pay to see them not perform. Great talent but like so many other entertainers these days, they assume that talent = knowledge and that we little people have neither.
They started renting those kayaks here this summer. Looks like fun but I don't think I'd have the balance to fish from one. There is a guy here who hauls a step ladder about 100 yards out into the water, sets it up and fishes from it.
I don't think that the little fellow will ever have "gender issues."
Resty, hug your mama and tell her that she is not to be blamed for your problems.
****
You astound me!
Heard on the radio -
Medicinal Properties of Honey and Cinnamon
[Note: None of the medicinal claims given in this article could be independently verified. However, it is known that honey and cinnamon are important herbs used in Ayurveda and oriental system of medicine. - Editor, Holisticonline.com]
It is found that mixture of Honey and Cinnamon cures most of the diseases. Honey is produced in most of the countries of the world.
Ayurvedic as well as Yunani medicine have been using honey as a vital medicine for centuries. Scientists of today also accept honey as a "Ram Ban" (very effective) medicine for all kinds of diseases. Honey can be used without any side effects for any kind of diseases.
Today's science says that even though honey is sweet, if taken in the right dosage as a medicine, it does not harm diabetic patients. Weekly World News, a magazine in Canada, on its issue dated 17 January, 95 has given the following list of diseases that can be cured by Honey and Cinnamon as researched by western scientists.
HEART DISEASES:
Make a paste of honey and cinnamon powder, apply on bread, chappati, or other bread, instead of jelly and jam and eat it regularly for breakfast. It reduces the cholesterol in the arteries and saves the patient from heart attack. Also those who already had an attack, if they do this process daily, they are kept miles away from the next attack. Regular use of the above process relieves loss of breath and strengthens the heartbeat. In America and Canada, various nursing homes have treated patients successfully and have found that as age the arteries and veins lose their flexibility and get clogged; honey and cinnamon revitalizes the arteries and veins.
ARTHRITIS:
Take one part honey to two parts of lukewarm water and add a small teaspoon of cinnamon powder, make a paste and massage it on the itching part of the body slowly. It is noticed that the pain recedes within a minute or two.
Arthritis patients may take daily, morning and night, one cup of hot water with two spoons of honey and one small teaspoon of cinnamon powder. If taken regularly even chronic arthritis can be cured.
In a recent research conducted at the Copenhagen University, it was found that when the doctors treated their patients with a mixture of one tablespoon Honey and half teaspoon cinnamon powder before breakfast, they found that within a week out of the 200 people so treated practically 73 patients were totally relieved of pain and within a month, mostly all the patients who could not walk or move around because of arthritis started walking without pain.
HAIR LOSS:
Those suffering from hair loss or baldness, may apply a paste of hot olive oil, one tablespoon of honey, one teaspoon of cinnamon powder before bath and keep it for approx. 15 min. and then wash the hair. It was found to be effective even if kept on for 5 minutes.
BLADDER INFECTIONS:
Take two tablespoons of cinnamon powder and one teaspoon of honey in a glass of lukewarm water and drink it. It destroys the germs in the bladder.
TOOTHACHE:
Make a paste of one teaspoon of cinnamon powder and five teaspoons of honey and apply on the aching tooth. This may be applied 3 times a day till the tooth stops aching.
CHOLESTEROL:
Two tablespoons of honey and three teaspoons of Cinnamon Powder mixed in 16 ounces of tea water, given to a cholesterol patient, was found to reduce the level of cholesterol in the blood by 10% within 2 hours. As mentioned for arthritic patients, if taken 3 times a day, any chronic cholesterol is cured. As per information received in the said journal, pure honey taken with food daily relieves complains of cholesterol.
COLDS:
Those suffering from common or severe colds should take one tablespoon lukewarm honey with 1/4 spoon cinnamon powder daily for 3 days. This process will cure most chronic cough, cold and clear the sinuses.
INFERTILITY:
Yunani and Ayurvedic Medicine have been using honey for thousands of years to strengthen the semen of men. If impotent men regularly take two tablespoon of honey before going to sleep, their problem will be solved.
In China, Japan and Far-East countries, women, who do not conceive and need to strengthen the uterus, have been taking cinnamon powder for centuries. Women who cannot conceive may take a pinch of cinnamon powder in half teaspoon of honey and apply it on the gums frequently throughout the day, so that it slowly mixes with the saliva and enters the body.
A couple in Maryland, USA, had no children for 14 years and had lost hope of having a child of their own. When told about this process husband and wife started taking honey and cinnamon as stated above, the wife conceived after a few months and had twins at full term.
UPSET STOMACH:
Honey taken with cinnamon powder cures stomachache and also clears stomach ulcers from the root.
GAS:
According to the studies done in India & Japan, it is revealed that if honey is taken with cinnamon powder the stomach is relieved of gas.
IMMUNE SYSTEM:
Daily use of honey and cinnamon powder strengthens the immune system and protects the body from bacteria and viral attacks. Scientists have found that honey has various vitamins and iron in large amounts. Constant use of honey strengthens the white blood corpuscles to fight bacteria and viral diseases.
INDIGESTION:
Cinnamon powder sprinkled on two tablespoons of honey taken before food, relieves acidity and digests the heaviest of meals.
INFLUENZA:
A scientist in Spain has proved that honey contains a natural ingredient, which kills the influenza germs and saves the patient from flu.
LONGEVITY:
Tea made with honey and cinnamon powder, when taken regularly arrests the ravages of old age. Take 4 spoons of honey, 1 spoon of cinnamon powder and 3 cups of water and boil to make like tea. Drink 1/4cup, 3 to 4 times a day. It keeps the skin fresh and soft and arrests old age. Life spans also increases and even a 100 years old, starts performing the chores of a 20-year-old.
PIMPLES:
Three tablespoons of Honey and one teaspoon of cinnamon powder paste. Apply this paste on the pimples before sleeping and wash it next morning with warm water. If done daily for two weeks, it removes pimples from the root.
SKIN INFECTIONS:
Applying honey and cinnamon powder in equal parts on the affected parts cures eczema, ringworm and all types of skin infections.
WEIGHT LOSS:
Daily in the morning 1/2hour before breakfast on an empty stomach and at night before sleeping, drink honey and cinnamon powder boiled in one-cup water. If taken regularly it reduces the weight of even the most obese person. Also drinking of this mixture regularly does not allow the fat to accumulate in the body even though the person may eat a high calorie diet.
CANCER:
Recent research in Japan and Australia has reveled that advanced cancer of the stomach and bones have been cured successfully. Patients suffering from these kinds of cancer should daily take one tablespoon of honey with one teaspoon of cinnamon powder for one month 3 times a day.
FATIGUE:
Recent studies have shown that the sugar content of honey is more helpful rather than being detrimental to the strength of the body. Senior citizens, who take honey and cinnamon power in equal parts, are more alert and flexible. Dr. Milton who has done research says that half tablespoon honey taken in a glass of water and sprinkled with cinnamon powder, taken daily after brushing and in the afternoon at about 3.00 p.m. when the vitality of the body starts to decrease, increases the vitality of the body within a week.
BAD BREATH:
People of South America, first thing in the morning gargle with one teaspoon of honey and cinnamon powder mixed in hot water. So their breath stays fresh throughout the day.
HEARING LOSS:
Daily morning and night honey and cinnamon powder taken in equal parts restore hearing.
***
Yikes.
That will be horrible for anyone to be subjected to.
Well Bless her heart, the Lord loves a Duck!
What I have seen of her she seem like a very gracious lady!
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