NON PRECIPITATION STATEMENT - Earth Has Left Its Orbit and Is Hurtling Towards the Sun (NWS)

National Weather Service ^ | December 17, 2003 | Heinlein!

[Dont Mention the War]

NON PRECIPITATION STATEMENT

URGENT - WEATHER MESSAGE
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE KANSAS CITY-PLEASANT HILL MO
1055 AM CST WED DEC 17 2003

...TEST...TEST...TEST...

.UNUSUALLY HOT WEATHER HAS ENTERED THE REGION FOR DECEMBER...AS THE EARTH HAS LEFT ITS ORBIT AND IS HURLING TOWARD THE SUN.

MOZ012-021-172251- ANDREW MO-CLINTON MO- 1055 AM CST WED DEC 17 2003

...EXCESSIVE HEAT WATCH IN EFFECT FROM THIS AFTERNOON TO LATE TONIGHT...

UNUSUALLY HOT WEATHER WILL OCCUR FOR AT LEAST THE NEXT SEVERAL DAYS AS THE EARTH DRAWS EVER NEARER TO THE SUN. THEREFORE...AN EXCESSIVE HEAT WATCH HAS BEEN POSTED.

STAY TUNED TO NOAA WEATHER RADIO AND OTHER LOCAL MEDIA FOR FURTHER DETAILS OR UPDATES.

$$ HEINLEIN

[Dont Mention the War]

So much for a white Christmas.

[martin_fierro]

[sissyjane]

What the He**!!

Is this a joke?

Earth has left it's orbit?

[NautiNurse]

Looks like there are two pancakes on that bunny's head.

[G-Bear]

And here I've been planning on being killed by a meteor!

[b4its2late]

This is hugh! Vey series!!!!

[So Cal Rocket]

Break out the sunscreen... SPF-1,000,000

[TBall]

Thanks, I'm going to max out the credit cards and have some fun!!

[No Blue States]

ROFL!

Good, Im ready for warmer weather already anyway.

[martin_fierro]

That's just what they want you to think....

[Coop]

If anyone needs me I'll be in the shower. (as in bathroom facility, not meteor related)

[TheBigB]

WOMEN, MINORITIES HARDEST HIT! </NY Times>

[Mad Dawgg]

"Is this a joke?

Earth has left it's orbit?"

I believe this is a current press release from the DNC...

They feel they need something bold and interesting to get the "Saddam Captured" Headline out of the news.

[Luke Skyfreeper]

Drat. I knew this was going to happen...

[RightWhale]

That would explain the overnight warming from -18 to -5 F. Of course that was at night, but then it is pretty much dark around the clock, just a subtle brightening around noon with the possibility of a sun a handsbreadth above the horizon in the unlikely event it happens to be clear.

[Made In The USA]

THAT'S IT!

I'm removing my tin-foil helmet and going out to loot the stores!

[Dont Mention the War]

How can they bump this to chat? This is NOOZ, dammit!

[spookycc]

Snicker... And yet, Spotter Activation is not anticipated. Seems like something we'd want to keep an eye on, before our retinas burn up. ;-))

[Wings-n-Wind]

...TEST...TEST...TEST...

Interpretative key... methinks

[battlegearboat]

I've felt a loss of gravity a few times in the last ten minutes.