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Posted on 12/13/2025 12:34:55 PM PST by where's_the_Outrage?
Sometimes living with your adult children feels like you’re running a small grocery store, and not in a fun way. One reader shared with Bright Side how her patience ran out after months of watching her daughter-in-law eat everything in sight while her son turned a blind eye.
Hi Bright Side,My name is Susan D., I’m 56, and my son and his wife moved in “just for a few months” after some personal issues. I was happy to help (I stocked the fridge, cooked meals, and tried to make everyone comfortable). But 8 months later, it feels like my home has turned into a free-for-all. My groceries disappear faster than I can buy them, and my son doesn’t seem to care.Thanksgiving was the last straw. I had carefully planned the meal, saved the turkey, and prepared all the sides for a cozy family dinner. When I went to the fridge, the turkey was gone, I mean it was completely eaten by my daughter-in-law. I grabbed my phone and sent them a message explaining that I couldn’t cover groceries forever and that she needed to contribute. Instead of understanding, she laughed and said, “It’s your house, but your rules are ridiculous.” My son shrugged like my frustration didn’t even matter.I’ve always tried to be kind and empathetic, but this feels like blatant disrespect. I want to support them, and I love my family, but I can’t allow my generosity to be treated as an endless privilege. Should I continue paying for everything......
Susan, you’re not wrong for feeling hurt. Anyone would be upset if their groceries kept disappearing, especially something as big as a whole Thanksgiving turkey. When family moves in, it’s normal to hope for teamwork and respect, not a one-sided situation where you feel taken for granted.
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Click here: to donate by Credit Card Or here: to donate by PayPal Or by mail to: Free Republic, LLC - PO Box 9771 - Fresno, CA 93794 Thank you very much and God bless you. |
My wife would have dinner ready for him when he got home, I bought the food, upgraded his wifi network, bought him a new washer/dryer, microwave, and mini-fridge. And tried my best to be a good houseguest. We're still good friends despite the negative impacts I'm sure we had on his lifestyle.
You have the right idea.
When I stay with someone, I make it a priority to contribute and to do as much as I can not to be an irritant.
It is simple courtesy.
The DIL must be a big fat pig.
You did the exact right thing.
And my hats off to you.
We have taken in several families members who needed a place for a period of time. After about a month we required them to have a plan on being independent with tangible steps. We held them accountable to their own plan which we didn’t require a time limit just next steps. We had two people felt that was too much pressure and found other arrangements.
I avoid staying with people if at all possible for any reason.
Family gathering? Hotel down the street. Kiddos can sleepover so they can play with cousins.
I show up bright and easily with McDonald’s or groceries to cook for everyone.
Bring booze (if it’s that kind of party) enough for way more than wit and I’ll drink. (And my wife is Apache; she seldom drinks dur to genetic issues and we sure as heck don’t bring booze to her family.)
So cutting off the food for your DIL.
Even for DIL pickles? 🥒
I would rather front them another month’s rent and wish them the best.
The daughter in law ate a whole, raw turkey? Is she a hyena?
You were wonderful.
For the most part you’re also somewhat the exception.
If the kids ‘need a place to stay’ - offer to pay the first two months rent up to $____ (fill in the blank). You can also stock the kitchen and pay for power to be turned on. You’ve helped but you’re not a rug. And they know where the boundaries are... it’s a favor larger than teaching them to be dependent...
Susan, you’re not wrong for feeling hurt. Anyone would be upset if their groceries kept disappearing, especially something as big as a whole Thanksgiving turkey. When family moves in, it’s normal to hope for teamwork and respect, not a one-sided situation where you feel taken for granted.
Adult answer. Kick them out.
Most were otherwise homeless. Two whom Parents died, two single teen moms, one marine with PTSD, two young married couples saving for home, one woman hiding from abusive husband, and homeless man living in tent. None had rental apartment and most also needed food,
What’s for dinner tonight? I’ll be over.
Maybe it was a Cornish game turkey.
95% of these articles are fake.
DIL sounds like a cow.
We used to have neighborhood gatherings, one couple always brought a six pack of beer, drank at least three times that amount, and no food. As soon as the beer was gone, they’d leave. One time, in advance, I told everyone else not to bring any beer , made sure to drink two of theirs, and then bought a case, after they departed. Later on, I was told that they were highly insulted ;)
who eats an entire turkey? this made me laugh.
Not setting rules and boundaries is what created such sponge offspring and offspring-in-law to begin with.
Wow! You two want to stay at my place a while?
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