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FBI Puts Kibosh on Gay Pride Celebration [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 1 June 2025 | John Semmens

Posted on 06/04/2025 11:59:51 AM PDT by John Semmens

This week, FBI Assistant Director for Public Affairs Ben Williamson clarified the agency's new position on gay pride activities. "I've received several questions about the FBI's stance on Pride Month and what related activities FBI divisions and employees should or should not participate in," he said in an email to assistant directors and special agents. "So, I want to take the opportunity to make FBI leadership's expectations clear: There should be no official FBI actions, events, or messaging regarding Pride Month."

"You are free to do whatever you want on your own time," he added. "The FBI's job as the country's premier law-enforcement agency is to take on the toughest and most important cases, to deal with the worst of the worst criminals, terrorists, and spies. We cannot divert our attention from this core mission. The citizens of this country need to have confidence that we are fully dedicated to keeping them as safe from these threats as we can when we are on the job."

Former FBI Director James Comey called the decision "tragic. The gay community is the most under appreciated segment of our population. Previous FBI Directors all understood this and made special efforts to uplift this small, but vital component of the social fabric. That the current administration fails to understand this deepens my regret that my efforts to save the nation from a Trump presidency failed. The denigration of the gay community coming so close on the heels of the FBI's decisions to reopen investigations into the Biden White House cocaine stash, the January 6 pipe bomber, and the Supreme Court Dobbs leak is profoundly disheartening. My only consolation is that there is still a chance to 86 47."


TOPICS: Government; History; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: 8647; jamescomey; lgbtq; satire

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1 posted on 06/04/2025 11:59:51 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

After all those guys bought matching khakis and sunglasses for the Patriot Front festivities? Bummer.


2 posted on 06/04/2025 12:02:50 PM PDT by MikelTackNailer ("We've taken care of everything, the words you read, the songs you sing...")
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To: MikelTackNailer
After all those guys bought matching khakis and sunglasses for the Patriot Front festivities? Bummer.

And they won't get to hang out in the bathroom all day during this month either. People would notice.

3 posted on 06/04/2025 12:13:54 PM PDT by MtnClimber (For photos of scenery, wildlife and climbing, click on my screen name for my FR home page.)
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To: John Semmens

my efforts to save the nation from a Trump presidency failed

This friends, is what’s called an “admission”.


4 posted on 06/04/2025 12:15:43 PM PDT by tumblindice (America's founding fathers: all armed conservatives)
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To: John Semmens

They’ve kiboshed before........


5 posted on 06/04/2025 12:31:47 PM PDT by beethovenfan (The REAL Great Reset will be when Jesus returns. )
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To: John Semmens


6 posted on 06/04/2025 12:38:18 PM PDT by fidelis (👈 Under no obligation to respond to rude, ignorant, abusive, bellicose, and obnoxious posts.)
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To: MtnClimber
And they won't get to hang out in the bathroom all day during this month either. People would notice.

Ah, but like Rick and Ilsa will always have Paris, the Patriot Front Boys will always have Bud Light.

7 posted on 06/04/2025 5:06:14 PM PDT by MikelTackNailer (Let the children use it. Let the children lose it. Let all the children boogie.)
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