Posted on 04/24/2025 2:51:23 PM PDT by DFG
CAMBRIDGE, MA — Local man Asher Grayson, who recently graduated from Harvard with a degree in neuroscience, confessed he feels woefully unprepared to join the workforce because the only thing he knows how to do is chant "Free Palestine!"
"I'm starting to think my $500,000 of student debt wasn't worth it because I don't know a thing about molecular neuroscience," said Dr. Grayson, who finally earned his PhD in 2024. "Free Palestine!"
Grayson is just one of several students who feel they've been failed by Ivy League universities that spent more time training them to protest Israel than helping them learn about their fields of study. Graduates in mathematics, computer science, and even gender studies reportedly know next to nothing about how to apply their degrees to a career because they only know how to shout "Free Palestine!" over and over again.
History professor Benjamin Lance dismissed concerns that his students are unprepared for a career after taking his course. "I stand by the rigorous Harvard curriculum," he said. "Maybe my students can't get jobs because of the Jews. Did you ever think of that?"
The labor market is oversaturated with people who call for a free Palestine while accusing Israel of ethnic cleansing, says economic expert and labor analyst Heather Dove. "They don't know how to hold even the simplest jobs because they only know how to say 'free Palestine' again and again," she said. "The lucky ones can spin it into a catchy jingle, but most of them just say the same two words repeatedly around the clock."
"It's really sad."
At publishing time, Asher Grayson had updated his CV to include that he also knows how to chant "globalize the intifada."
This is like a millimeter away from the absolute truth.
Every revolutionary group speaks broadly of Our People - but they mean Our Clique and have no interest in the opinions of their future slaves.
He’s probably pretty good at keying Teslas, too.
RE: “Maybe my students can’t get jobs because of the Jews. Did you ever think of that?”
No, because I’m not anti-semitic like you, moron.
You do know this is satire, right?
Their satire merely exposes the truth. And my sarcasm comes from the root word “to cut or slash open” “tear flash” or “speak bitterly.”
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.