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Kamala Admits She Can't Remember If She Was In Charge Of Border As She Was Pretty Drunk These Last 4 Years And Honestly It’s All A Bit Hazy
Babylon Bee ^ | 07/27/2024 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 07/27/2024 12:57:50 PM PDT by DFG

U.S. — After initially denying having anything to do with the border crisis, Vice President Kamala Harris admitted today that she may not be remembering correctly as she's been really drunk the past four years straight and it's all a bit of a fog.

"Honestly, I've been so wasted -- who knows what I did the past four years," said Harris, dumping another Tito's shooter into her tumbler. "Border czar?? Whatever you say, man."

According to sources, Harris reflexively denied all responsibility for the border catastrophe as she had no memory of having ever visited the border. "I figured if I was responsible for the border I would have gone, like, once," said Harris adding a wine cooler to her tumbler. "I guess I've been so blackout drunk for the past four years, I just don't remember. Geez, it looks like it was pretty bad, huh?"

With Biden stepping aside, the Vice President's team has been reportedly explaining to her all of the jobs she did during the past administration while she was plastered. "Yes, you really did go to Europe to try to keep Ukraine from being invaded. No, it didn't turn out well," explained aide Regina Callahan. "Do you remember talking about yellow school buses? How about outer space? Oh man, we have a lot to cover."

At publishing time, Kamala had furiously argued that if she had twice been a presidential candidate, surely one person in the nation had voted for her - before again confessing that she's been heavily inebriated the past decade and it's possible she could be slightly off.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; border; czar; drunk; drunkkamala; kamala; vp; wino
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1 posted on 07/27/2024 12:57:50 PM PDT by DFG
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To: DFG

She sounds like President Retard


2 posted on 07/27/2024 1:02:27 PM PDT by NWFree (Somebody has to say it 🤪)
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To: DFG

Kackula is a lush.


3 posted on 07/27/2024 1:02:38 PM PDT by ifinnegan (Democrats kill babies and harvest their organs to sell)
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To: DFG

And her kneepads are worn out and she can’t remember why. She say “is that why I have TMJ?”


4 posted on 07/27/2024 1:03:25 PM PDT by MtnClimber (For photos of scenery and wildlife, click on my screen name for my FR home page. More photos added.)
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To: DFG

She always acts and talks like she’s either half drunk or stoned.


5 posted on 07/27/2024 1:03:26 PM PDT by laplata (They want each crisis to take the greatest toll possible.)
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To: laplata

It is not for nothing that Hispanics refer to her as “Que mala” Harris. But now, we can be sure, she will straighten up and fly right.

Ya, sure, you betcha.


6 posted on 07/27/2024 1:07:22 PM PDT by alloysteel (Most people slog through life without ever knowing the wonders of true insanity.)
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To: DFG

Amazing that the Bee isn’t really satire anymore. It’s closer to the truth.


7 posted on 07/27/2024 1:08:04 PM PDT by realcleanguy (quickly things are falling apart, now that the )
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To: DFG

She probably needs some of that cocaine laying around the White House


8 posted on 07/27/2024 1:08:44 PM PDT by NWFree (Somebody has to say it 🤪)
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To: DFG

More likely she’s had her heels way up in the air in anticipation of this unique opportunity.It certainly worked for her in Kalifornia.


9 posted on 07/27/2024 1:08:50 PM PDT by Gay State Conservative (Never Trust A Man Whose Uncle Was Eaten By Cannibals)
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To: DFG

🥴🍺

"She might not necessarily be drunk. She's a Democrat so it "might" just be stupidity!

(or both!)

10 posted on 07/27/2024 1:09:38 PM PDT by airborne (Thank you Rush for helping me find FreeRepublic! )
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To: laplata
She always acts and talks like she’s either half drunk or stoned.

Half drunk, other half stoned explains it.

11 posted on 07/27/2024 1:10:12 PM PDT by FatherofFive (we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor)
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To: DFG

She had to be drunk when giving that school bus monologue. Just ugh!


12 posted on 07/27/2024 1:10:15 PM PDT by MayflowerMadam (It's not as if Biden has the nuclear codes or anything. 😳)
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To: FatherofFive

She’s a lush, for sure. A maintenance drunk.


13 posted on 07/27/2024 1:12:50 PM PDT by laplata (They want each crisis to take the greatest toll possible.)
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To: alloysteel

Mala in spanish can mean either bad or mean. She’s both.


14 posted on 07/27/2024 1:16:09 PM PDT by laplata (They want each crisis to take the greatest toll possible.)
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To: realcleanguy

It sure is.


15 posted on 07/27/2024 1:16:50 PM PDT by laplata (They want each crisis to take the greatest toll possible.)
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To: airborne

Indeed she was born with it no need to guess why she giggles so much.


16 posted on 07/27/2024 2:23:41 PM PDT by Vaduz
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To: DFG

I have a scene in my mind where she is in a posh hotel lounge, sitting alone at the bar with a cigarette and scotch, in the re-make of the 1987 film “Barfly”


17 posted on 07/27/2024 2:40:33 PM PDT by llevrok (Say NO to a fourth Obama term!)
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To: DFG

And tell her to remember that the passage of time is like... Ya’ know? Time passaging.


18 posted on 07/27/2024 2:44:42 PM PDT by Bullish (...And just like that, I was dropped from the ping-list)
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To: ifinnegan

Finaly leftistbposistions will be seen in the broad daylight. I prefer a fair fight.


19 posted on 07/27/2024 3:14:03 PM PDT by cowboyusa (YESHUA IS KING AMERICA, AND HE WILL HAVE NO OTHER GODS BEFORE HIM!)
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To: DFG

Love The Bee!


20 posted on 07/27/2024 3:29:06 PM PDT by null and void (I identify as a conspiracy theorist. My personal pronouns are told/you/so.)
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