Posted on 07/19/2023 9:58:31 AM PDT by DFG
LOS ANGELES, CA — As writers and actors continue to strike against the insatiable greed of the studio executives who have oppressed them for years, The world is now in its third month of realizing they're just fine without Hollywood.
"At first I was worried, but then I remembered that Hollywood doesn't really contribute anything of meaningful value to the world whatsoever," said one local woman. "Without Hollywood, I can still go outside, spend time with my kids, and catch up on decades worth of classic films that are much better than anything they make today!"
"Thanks for helping me see the light, WGA!"
Experts believe that with writers and actors on strike, many people will spend less time watching remakes, reboots, and Marvel sequels and instead be involved in activities that enrich the mind and give life to the soul. "This is an absolute catastrophe," said Disney President Bob Iger. "Without the ability to turn the minds of your children into quivering blobs of inert pudding, we're finished."
At publishing time, the world breathed another sigh of relief upon realizing the strike would prevent any sequels to Greta Gerwig's Barbie.
I know this is supposed to satire.
However it is amazing close to truth.
Lol! Why is this from the Babylon Bee, it’s absolutely true! Seriously, there are so many entertainment options these days the the vast majority of people probably haven’t even noticed there is a strike.
Hollyweird needs to crawl back under their perverted rock
Get lost good riddance overpaid slimeballs
They need more mansions on the rising coast feel sorry for us
Bahahaha. Frauds
Mostly repeats in the summer. Movies out now are pre strike so new movies out every Friday. December when there are no new tv shows, movies or hallmark movies, you’ll hear yelling. Not for the thousand on FR, but the rest of the country won’t be happy.
I think they should move shop to Riyadh…
Well they can’t write or act anyway
Homosexuals, trannies and perverts hardest hit. F word in dire need of scripts!
Gotta feel for him. That was, after all, their stock in trade.
Wait, there is a strike?
The Babylon Bee has been doing that a lot these days.
My house is getting along JUST FINE!!
Strike on! Hollywood can go pound!
Boy, ain't that the truth.
Hollywood is on strike?
The only “Hollywood” movie I really want to see this year is Dune 2, and that’s not affected by the writer’s strike so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Nah, Pulitzers are tainted. I’d decline if they tried to give me one of those dirty things.
The Bee should just make their own award, a “truth in satire” award or something, and give it to themselves.
Anything being released now has been completed for some time. The crunch will come when no tv shows can launch or roll out new seasons this fall. For movies, the strike will affect 2024 and 2025 releases.
I’ve watched virtually no tv (except occasional live sports) for 30 years or more. There’s only one current series in which I have even the slightest interest. I do like movies and hope the strike and ensuing drought aren’t too long.
That said, this is an opportunity for foreign films and independent producers to make inroads. I noted with interest that A24 is not a member of the Borg, and A24 productions are continuing. I don’t have a list of other indies who are also moving ahead, but I will give them a generic cheer and watch for whatever they can come up with. SAG-AFTRA is also now granting waivers to indies to let them proceed. Good.The Borg (basically the streamers) is the problem.
The streamers overextended and bought most of the big legacy studios in the process. They upended the whole business model of everyone in the industry and now, staggering under unsustainable debt incurred when they were all chasing growth at any cost, they are now discovering that streaming isn’t generating anything close to the revenues they need. They’re selling off assets, squeezing the creatives, raising subscription prices, and bringing back ads. Disney, Amazon, Netflix, Warner Media, Apple, etc. all made the same blunder. Groupthink.
The problem is that they swallowed most of the legacy studios and put the theaters in a world of hurt. The Borg needs to die, but it’s going to take a lot of quality players down at the same time.
Oh no, you mean a remake of Gilligan’s Island (Skipper and Gillian are gay and Gillian underage, The Millionaire and his spouse are looking for another ‘Epstein Island’, the movie star is a porn star, the professor is a scientist who is a MAGA RADICAL and Mary Ann is a normal American), Father knows Best (2 gay dads with a gay son), My Three Sons (a widowed dad with 3 sons (1 normal, 1 trans and 1 a teen baby) and The Brady Bunch (2 gay dads got married) are not going to show up in the fall? I wanted to see them...🤓
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