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Capitol Cop Assails Carlson [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 30 April 2023 | John Semmens

Posted on 04/30/2023 10:02:48 AM PDT by John Semmens

US Capitol Police Chief Thomas Manger called the firing of Tucker Carlson by FOX News “long overdue. This clown has no respect for authority. His lopsided criticism of our handling of the January 6 insurrection invited unwarranted complaints against the way the government dealt with these traitors.”

“Carlson thinks the way the government treated the insurrectionists was harsh considering how peaceful many of the Capitol invaders were,” Manger said. “Well, we would’ve been within our rights to have shot all of them. They were illegally present inside a government building. None of them had guns. Killing them would’ve been easy. Carlson should have appreciated the fact that we only shot one of these invaders.”

“For a while, the damage to the morale our officers from Carlson’s airing of an unbalanced selection of the January 6 videos was substantial,” Manger admitted. “But it has perked up knowing that Carlson has lost his TV platform. I hope the rest of the media will be wise enough to understand that keeping him off the air is essential to preserving our democracy. And I hope that Carlson will be wise enough to understand the risks he will be taking if he continues to broadcast his anti-government propaganda via any other media outlet.”

If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...

https://libertyusa21.wordpress.com/semi-news-semi-satire-by-john-semmens/


TOPICS: Government; History; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: censorship; insurrection; jan6; satire; tuckercarlson

1 posted on 04/30/2023 10:02:48 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens
For a while, the damage to the morale our officers from Carlson’s airing of an unbalanced selection of the January 6 videos was substantial,” Manger admitted.
Ah, yes, all those cop suicides were after the videos release. Thanks for clarifying.
2 posted on 04/30/2023 10:19:56 AM PDT by nicollo ("I said no!")
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To: John Semmens

So, Thomas, you think Tucker Carlson is a clown?! Well, talk about projection! The commiecrats are just using you! You are what they call a useful idiot (although I just think you’re an idiot, but not useful at all!)!


3 posted on 04/30/2023 10:20:27 AM PDT by No name given (Anonymous is who you’ll know me as.)
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To: John Semmens

If you’re taking flak, you’re over the target. BOMBS AWAY!


4 posted on 04/30/2023 10:33:32 AM PDT by Lonesome in Massachussets (Forsan et haec olim meminisse iuvabit.)
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To: John Semmens

None of them had guns.

Killing them would’ve been easy.

Carlson should have appreciated

the fact that we only shot one

of these invaders.”

/\

There it is.

Cold
Blooded
#$/*;:#

Babbitt wasn’t the only citizen killed that day.

CHP easily killed a few that day,

cuz as in his own words

it was ‘easy’.

Zero CHP died from that day.

And we citizens

are supposed to be

appreciative ?

Of what ?


5 posted on 04/30/2023 10:40:57 AM PDT by cuz1961 (USCGR Veteran )
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To: John Semmens
Well, we would’ve been within our rights to have shot all of them. They were illegally present inside a government building. None of them had guns. Killing them would’ve been easy. Carlson should have appreciated the fact that we only shot one of these invaders.” (Emphasis mine)

That's right. The Capitol Police have been anointed judge, jury and executioner.

6 posted on 04/30/2023 10:45:05 AM PDT by mikey_hates_everything
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To: John Semmens
"US Capitol Police Chief Thomas Manger ... said. “Well, we would’ve been within our rights to have shot all of them. They were illegally present inside a government building. None of them had guns. Killing them would’ve been easy."

THIS is how they feel about you.

Don't let them lull you into a trap, or an ambush. Be smart - know their ways.

7 posted on 04/30/2023 10:57:19 AM PDT by Psalm 73 ("You'll never hear surf music again" - J. Hendrix)
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