Posted on 04/03/2023 9:27:59 AM PDT by John Semmens
While flying around on private jets emits more greenhouse gases than traveling by any other means, Special Presidential Envoy for Climate John Kerry defends the practice for himself and his fellow millionaires. "We are the planet's last hope for averting climate catastrophe," he argued. "There are so few of us heroes that the extra pollution we cause is tiny when compared with the massive amounts generated by ordinary people in their everyday travel for work or pleasure."
"With time swiftly running out for our planet it is essential that we use the fastest available methods for getting to our far flung climate summits at posh hotels and resorts scattered around the world," Kerry said. "Getting criticized for this is a stab in the back from the people we're trying to save. I guess I'm supposed to forgive them for their ignorant jealousy, but I, for one, resent it. By the time they realize what I've done for them I'll probably be dead."
"Practically speaking, if we are to have a chance of saving the planet we need big reductions in carbon emissions," Kerry asserted. "To achieve this, the billions of people who each make small individual contributions to harmful emissions is where meaningful sacrifices must be made. Getting them to give up personal automobiles, consuming meat, and living in single family homes by switching to public transit, eating insects, and living communally is crucial and fully justifies the small luxuries of those of us working so hard to make this happen."
If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...
https://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,495398.0.html
I’d like to see him justifying shooting himself in the ass with an M-79 grenade launcher.
That was a good one!
I thought he used that "excuse" 50+ years ago some where.....
Some people think their ways including treason are higher and better than the people that pay their wages.
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