Posted on 10/15/2022 12:39:11 AM PDT by John Semmens
Alarmed by the increasingly dangerous rhetoric regarding the Ukraine-Russian war, former President Donald Trump has offered to try "to negotiate peace before we lapse into World War III." President Biden objected to "this unwanted intrusion. I won the 2020 election, not Trump. I represent the will of the people. What Trump wants doesn't matter. What I want does. We are confronting Putin's threat to use nukes in Ukraine and countering it with our threat to nuke Russia if he does."
Biden went on to point out that "all the great thinkers are with me on this. European Union foreign policy chief Josep Borrell says we should annihilate the Russian Army if they use nukes against Ukraine. Rep. Liz Cheney and all the mainstream Republicans back standing up to Putin. Ukraine's President Volodymyr Zelensky has already called for a nuclear strike on Russia. We are unified in our position of strength."
Biden went on to mock those who fear nuclear war, saying "I see that failed presidential candidate Tulsi Gabbard—you know, I beat her before I beat Trump—has leaped on the cowards' express train—even going so far as to leave the Democratic Party that allowed her to represent the state of Hawaii in Congress. And that kooky Hungarian Prime Minister Viktor Orban who believes Trump could do a better job on this issue than I can. Does he not recognize that I can have the FBI arrest Trump whenever I want to? Putin should know that nobody f***s with a Biden. And if he doesn't, well, we are prepared. I can be inside the White House bomb-proof shelter within minutes. I have purchased $290 million worth of Chinese anti-radiation drugs to treat the survivors of any nuclear exchange we have with Russia."
Gabbard responded to Biden's eagerness for war, saying that "his thinking on this issue vindicates my decision to leave the Democratic Party because it is now under the complete control of an elitist cabal of warmongers driven by cowardly wokeness, who divide us by racializing every issue, stoke anti-white racism, actively work to undermine our God-given freedoms, are hostile to people of faith and spirituality, demonize the police and protect criminals at the expense of law-abiding Americans, believe in open borders, weaponize the national security state to go after political opponents, and above all, are dragging us ever closer to nuclear war."
In related news, Sen. Chris Murphy (D-Conn) suggested that "a little saber rattling in the direction of Saudi Arabia for their refusal to help out our Party by delaying their oil production cuts until after the November elections seems warranted. For years we have looked the other way as Saudi Arabia has chopped up journalists and engaged in massive political repression, for one reason: we wanted to know that when the chips were down, we could count on them to help us out. If we're going to nuke Russia maybe we could also launch a few at Saudi Crown Price Mohammed bin Salman."
If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...
https://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Opinion/333951-2022-10-15-semi-news-semi-satire-october-16-2022-edition.htm
ping
Good one.......smirk.
Good satire - there are NO great thinkers in the modern world. None.
As usual.
Things aren’t funny unless there is some degree of truth to it.
Which is scary in this case.
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