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Study Shows Kids Who Are Homeschooled Could Miss Out On Opportunity To Be A Gay Communist
Babylon Bee ^ | 06/13/2022 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 06/13/2022 3:39:17 PM PDT by DFG

U.S.—Education experts are warning about the detrimental effects of homeschooling, as it may cause children to miss out on their opportunity to be gay communists.

"The two essential roles of public education are to turn kids into communists, and then make them gay," said AFL-CIO President Randi Weingarten. "If education fails to accomplish both of those things in the life of a child, it has failed miserably."

Studies show that while homeschooled kids may excel in advanced mathematics, literature, history, Latin, debate, civics, religion, music, art, theoretical physics, and physical fitness, most kids educated by their parents fall woefully short in essential subjects like Communism and being gay.

"We need common-sense regulation of homeschooling to ensure our nation's kids are sufficiently perverted by gender theory and fully ready for the violent overthrow of the Republic to usher in a glorious communist utopia," said Weingarten. "No child should be left behind."

Lawmakers are discussing programs to send drag queens to the homes of homeschoolers but insisted they will have to repeal the 2nd Amendment and take away all the guns first.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; bidenvoters; communist; education; gay; homeschool

1 posted on 06/13/2022 3:39:17 PM PDT by DFG
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To: DFG

Sometimes, the satire is just too easy.


2 posted on 06/13/2022 3:41:06 PM PDT by FatherofFive (We support Trump. Not the GOP)
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To: DFG

Think of the children!


3 posted on 06/13/2022 3:43:55 PM PDT by nickcarraway
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To: DFG

Don’t worry, they can still get it at University


4 posted on 06/13/2022 3:44:54 PM PDT by PGR88
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To: DFG

“Study Shows Kids Who Are Homeschooled Could Miss Out On Opportunity To Be A Gay Communist”

Oh how awful.


5 posted on 06/13/2022 3:46:33 PM PDT by antidemoncrat
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To: FatherofFive
Today's satire is next year's    next month's    next week's   sometime a little after tonight's dinner reality.
6 posted on 06/13/2022 3:48:12 PM PDT by KarlInOhio (If Hitler invaded Hell, I would make at least a favourable reference of the Devil...-Churchill)
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To: DFG

Oh man, The Bee has been killing it lately.


7 posted on 06/13/2022 3:57:50 PM PDT by Roadrunner383 (;)
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To: DFG

Bulls-Eye!

This one needs to go viral. Hit every demographic.


8 posted on 06/13/2022 3:59:02 PM PDT by Salvavida
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To: DFG

Gee, ya thaink?


9 posted on 06/13/2022 3:59:56 PM PDT by gitmo (If your theology doesn't become your biography, what good is it?)
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To: Roadrunner383

I agree. They have been spot on!!


10 posted on 06/13/2022 4:02:07 PM PDT by lizma2
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To: DFG; 6amgelsmama; 100American; AAABEST; aberaussie; AccountantMom; Aggie Mama; agrace; ...
Lawmakers are discussing programs to send drag queens to the homes of homeschoolers but insisted they will have to repeal the 2nd Amendment and take away all the guns first.

And that part is NOT satire.

Arth ping.

The Babylon Bee strikes again.

11 posted on 06/13/2022 4:11:07 PM PDT by metmom (...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith….)
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To: DFG

Whenever I got hit with the tired “what about socialization?” argument, I replied “I don’t want my kids to be socialists.”

It worked. All are normals. Christian conservatives.

Standard issue hair color. Only one tattoo and that’s honoring a friend who drowned that my son tried to rescue and did cpr on.

(I’ll give him a pass)


12 posted on 06/13/2022 4:25:39 PM PDT by cyclotic (I won't give up my FREEDOM for your FEAR. Oh Canada, we stand on guard for thee.)
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To: metmom

Have to repeal the 2amd...does that mean that they want to be be forced onto the homeschoolers whether wanted or not?


13 posted on 06/13/2022 4:35:05 PM PDT by arthurus (| covfefe I|)
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To: DFG

My laughter at the headline literally echoed off the walls.


14 posted on 06/13/2022 5:24:48 PM PDT by SeafoodGumbo
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To: DFG

Not just a gay communist, but an HIV+ gay communist. That’s the very best kind.


15 posted on 06/13/2022 6:32:21 PM PDT by TChad ("Joe, we should evacuate the civilians before the military. You understand that, right? Joe?")
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To: arthurus

That would be my guess when it comes to the democrats.

This is technically satire, you know.

The Babylon Bee is the site that I refer to as tomorrow’s news, today.


16 posted on 06/13/2022 6:50:19 PM PDT by metmom (...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith….)
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To: FatherofFive

It’s not even satire. The Bee is turning in to a legitimate news source.


17 posted on 06/13/2022 6:52:06 PM PDT by MayflowerMadam (Joe Biden has been protected by assault weapons his entire adult life. )
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To: PGR88
Don’t worry, they can still get it at University

Oh, that's so true. If only homeschooling could continue through college...

One of the local co-ops was offered college credit by an accrediting agency if at least two teachers had masters degrees. So, a "homeschool college co-op" might be an option, if people were willing to take it that far.

18 posted on 06/13/2022 7:25:28 PM PDT by Tired of Taxes
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To: metmom

Or sometimes this evening’s news at lunch.


19 posted on 06/14/2022 6:53:14 AM PDT by arthurus (| covfefe 7)
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