Posted on 09/28/2020 5:10:10 PM PDT by grundle
SACRAMENTO, CA—In a shocking twist no one could have seen coming, thousands of inmates within the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation experienced sudden-onset gender dysphoria after Gavin Newsom announced prisoners will be housed according to their gender identity.
"Uh, yeah, I, like, feel like a woman," said Brass Knuckles Billy, who has been incarcerated in Crescent City for violent crimes for many years. "I never felt this inside myself before, but once I heard Gavin Newsom affirm who I really am inside, I knew I had to come out."
"I've always known I was actually a girl," said Rapin' Rick, an inmate in Chino, as he put on a wig hastily made out of cigarettes. "I can't wait to take my place as a real woman at long last."
Some suspect there is an ulterior motive to the sudden switch in gender identity, though no one in California's government can figure out what it is. Some think that the male prisoners just really want to see if women's bathrooms are really as nice and clean as the rumors say.
The Bee hits another one out of the park.
I wonder if USA Today will investigate this “news story” to verify whether it is true or false? And do a story on its findings.
Well they can do a rape or one or two or three, intimidate and abuse the other women into whatever, eventually they’ll get transferred out again once they have done a good bit of carnage. Great policy
Oh USA Today will have their hands full covering all the rapes that take place after 90% of the men transfer to the women’s prisons. Its going to get so that half the men don’t want to get out of prison any more on account of the sex they are getting inside.
There are plenty of men who feel like 18-year-old girls. Problem is their wives slap them upside the head whenever their gaze falls for more than a nanosecond on one.
Maybe USA Today will fact check this.
It might be a good thing if California were to be burned off clean and started over.
Imagining myself in jail I don’t think so. I think it will be horrific. But obviously no one cares about the jailed women’s safety.
I do too!...but to think instant celibacy is part of every prison sentence is absurd...its why I mentioned "human nature"...
Gives new meaning to doing hard time.
This is not satire. Any male prisoner In California who doesn’t suddenly identify as a woman is an idiot.
I think celibacy is part of the nature of a prison sentence.
But I’d favor prison reform anyway to wit:
Death penalty (some time in a house arrest situation while awaiting trial and during trial; some sort of prison for limited appeals)
Or restitution (being in a house arrest or prison type setting depending on behavior with all proceeds conservator managed for your upkeep and repaying of your victims two to four fold)
Celibacy not part of house arrest presumably.
"In these conjugal visits, you can have sex with women?"
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