Posted on 12/29/2019 9:47:45 AM PST by real saxophonist
Drafting men over 60—-this is funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier-
I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I’m too old to track down terrorists. You can’t be older than 42 to join the military. They’ve got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn’t be able to join a military unit until you’re at least 35.
For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.
Young guys haven’t lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. ‘My back hurts! I can’t sleep, I’m tired and hungry’ We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.
An 18-year-old doesn’t even like to get up before 10 a..m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, ‘I’m tired and can’t sleep and since I’m already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-b**ch.
If captured we couldn’t spill the beans because we’d forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.
Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We’re used to getting screamed and yelled at and we’re used to soft food. We’ve also developed an appreciation for guns. We’ve been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.
They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I’ve been in combat and didn’t see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.
Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I’ve never seen anyone outrun a bullet.
An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He’s still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn’t figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.
These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm’s way..
Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.
How about recruiting Women over 50 …..in menopause! You think Men have attitudes! Ohhhhhh my God!
If nothing else, put them on border patrol…. They’ll have it secured the first night!
Send this to all of your senior friends…it’s in big type so they can read it.
I’m on board!
lol!
For the record, I’m not anywhere near 60. Yet. 8~)
Not only that but youth and exuberance gets beat any day of the week by experience and cunning.....
Me too.
I LIKE that line of thinking.
I emailed this to every man/woman over 50 on my contact list.
“...experience and cunning....”
... and treachery.
If I could go back to my Army ASA MOS, without going thru Basic again, I’m in.
Total BS
Laughed all the way through.
Never pick a fight with an old man. He will just kill you and leave you in the ditch.
Sort of like a Honey Badger, doesn’t care.
What happens when you’re 65 y/o, hiding from the enemy, and you keep needing to take a whiz after sunset?
Will such men be issued government approved collection bags?
Then, what happens to all those bags?
Not too friendly to the environment, if you know what I mean!
If my 65 year old carcass is needed for cannon fodder, i’ll be there.
I’d be glad to fight. I have lived long enough and what could be better than dying in battle?
It's true. I think about sex in the morning. Then I take a nap and stop thinking about it. And when I wake up again, I think about sex for the second time that day - until bed time.
I’m 70. I want a colonel commission so I can wear the white suit. I plan on sitting on the front porch like Jed Clampett Shooting flies off the wall and any scumbag commies/muzzies that come to take me out.
It would be a good way to get back into form. Start with 1 pushup a day, then move up. In basic training there is barely enough time for a full night’s sleep, so getting up 2-3 times a night for the bathroom won’t seem as bad.
We don’t think of sex all the time. Creaky bones and arthritis are foremost on our minds, along with the geographical coordinates, compass heading, and distance within 2 feet of the nearest latrine and how long it takes to get there.
As for the yelling and screaming, it can’t be anywhere near as bad as the missus. 20 years of that has deadened the hearing anyway, so let the seargent yell and scream.
Bull....I’m 62....I think about sex whenever visually stimulated by female beauty and often simply from organic memory....100s of times a day
Thank you
That guy needs his pituitary checked for T output
> I’d be glad to fight. I have lived long enough and what could be better than dying in battle?
WINNING in battle! j/k
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