Buttigieg Defends Outreach to Blacks [semi-satire]

Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 24 Nov 2019 | John Semmens

[John Semmens]

Polls have shown that Mayor Pete Buttigieg is having a hard time attracting minority voters. A Quinnipiac University survey found that he has the support of less than one percent of black voters—lower than rival candidate Marianne Williamson. Worse still, a photo on his website purporting to illustrate blacks who have backed his bid for the 2020 Democratic presidential nomination is actually a photo of a Kenyan woman.

The Mayor insists that he was "not trying to deceive anyone" and maintained that the photo in question "is more akin to that of a duck decoy. My hope was that by showing the photo of a black person among photos of claimed supporters I could attract other blacks to my pond, so to speak." Of course, the fate of ducks who are duped by decoys is to be shot by hunters. Buttigieg swears that blacks who are enticed into his camp "will definitely not be shot. I want their money and their votes, not their lives."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,383387.0.html

[ConservativeDude]

I think he needs to trot out the heavily accented “I aint in no ways tard” line.....that should lock up the support.

[MrEdd]

About that outreach.
Let go of the zipper, Pete.

[dayglored]

The Buttplug would have done better if he just stuck to stating his beliefs, platform, goals, vision, plans -- you know, the things America expects a President to actually DO in office.

Making such a big freakin' deal of being a homosexual has worked against him. Most Americans are pretty tolerant of differences in personal habits, including sexual. But we do NOT like that stuff shoved in our face.

Sorry Pete, I don't think being gay is a qualification for President, any more than being blond.

OBTW, Pete, your beliefs, platform, goals, vision, and plans SUCK. When you lose, that's why you lost, not because you're gay.

[Boogieman]

I think he just needs to go out and campaign with some black celebrity endorser. Like RuPaul. That should cinch the black vote for him, surely.

[pnut22]

You deserve a chicken dinner.

[duckman]

I know this is satire however in the real world Mayor Pete may as well forget about the Black and Hispanic male vote. It’s my understanding they do not like gays.

[dirtymac]

Two things wrong, just wrong, with his duck decoy statement. 1. He admits he is lying because he does not have any black female supporters, and 2. A duck decoy is very appropriate for any Democratic candidate to black voters “we are luring you in and when you get close enough or we don’t need you any more you are going to get blasted to smithereens” Just like the Democrats have always done to any constituency group when no longer filing their servile role.

Wake up black voters, actually all voters, The Democrats have been and will always be lying to you. Trump has shown in the past 3 years just what he can do even with a total and complete opposition of Congress, the ‘free’ press, the courts, and the beaucracy.

[dirtymac]

I think he needs to trot out the heavily accented “I aint in no ways tard” line.....that should lock up the support.

---

If that doesn’t work he can always tell a story when he forced a big black brother to back down because he was going to kick his ass. Joe Biden has already used that story line but when you are a democrat lying is the name of the game.