Posted on 12/18/2013 2:15:41 PM PST by Impala64ssa
With a week to go before the big day, I’ve need to get something off my chest: If I hear Paul McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmastime” again I’m going to convert to Norse paganism, grab a battle-ax and lay waste to the local all-holiday radio station.
The choir of children sing their song! Ding dong! Ding dong! Ding dong! ding Ahhhhhhh… "SECURITY! A Viking just killed the board op! Save us from the wrath of the Northmen!"
The ex-Beatle abomination is number one on my list and I can’t even bear to embed the video. But there are other horrifying songs that litter airwaves, malls and waiting rooms in an effort to ruin this time of year.
2. Band Aid "Do They Know Its Christmas"
A common question among early 80s New Romantics was “What do Bob Geldof and Midge Ure think about the birth of Christ?” Unfortunately they answered with a British “all-star” carol featuring heartwarming lines such as:
And the Christmas bells that ring there Are the clanging chimes of doom Well tonight thank God it's them instead of you
Just try to enjoy those presents now, you Thatcherite fascists!
3. Bruce Springsteen "Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town" Springsteen is popular in New Jersey because he always sings about escaping New Jersey. Santa didn’t get the hint and is flying into Newark unless Bruce can ward him off with his gravelly voice and faux stage banter. This song mostly makes the list because I’ve heard it every day of Advent since I discovered radio. Enough.
4. Wham! "Last Christmas" face on a lover with a fire in his heart A man under cover but you tore him apart
George Michael isn’t singing about Santa or the baby Jesus in this one. But occasionally you can hear it hummed in public bathrooms coast to coast.
5. John Lennon "Happy Xmas (War Is Over)" In a world of bad ideas, “Hey, let’s ask the atheist to write a Christmas song!” might have the worst results. As the video shows, the proper spelling is “Xmas” and the season needs less decking the halls and more dying children in far-off places. Ex-Beatles and Christmas don't mix.
So those are my picks. What do you think are the worst Christmas songs of all time?
That video listed under that one with all the commercials from the holiday special is a jackpot. Worth the 20 minutes...
Memories of childhood still lingering there.
How pretty the paper
The lights and the snow.
How precious those memories of long, long ago.
Prine is one of if not the best lyricsts ever. Smokes Dylan although I admit I am not a Dylan fan.
Worst songs:
Anything written by jews, no offense to my jewish friends, but they are secular songs that have nothing to do with Christmas. But catchy tunes.
A few years ago Glenn Beck was hot on a goup...Over The Rhine. They had a beautiful Christmas song...”All I Ever Get For Christmas Is Blue.”
Nah, I like the Mr. Magoo version.
It's been nearly 2,000 yearsIf you want to listen to it, surf over here.
Since you left us.
You gave the poor their god
You suffered ridicule from the rich,
You did it all in vain...The people were not wise,
Least of all, Christians,
Despite all of their praying.
You loved in vain.
You died for nothing.
And everything remained the same.
"I want a hee haw honey or a playboy bunny ( for Christmas )"...
Delightfully tacky, yet refined...
My favorite recording or “The First Noel” is by Dick Haymes and the Song Spinners from 1944—a truly beautiful arrangement. Sadly, it’s not on Youtube.
Same here. I was a teenager when that song first came out. Hated it then, and still hate it today.
That's my pick, too.
It actually makes me ANGRY.
Some novelty song from the early 80s that at the time MIGHT have been "cute" is now just IRRITATING.
At my office, where I work 12 hour shifts they have the Christmas channel on.
The other day I counted how many times I heard the John Lennon "War is Over" song.
FIVE times, and that does not include the cover versions by other singers, so I probably heard it 8 or 9.
I'm such a Grinch.
I picture myself with those cartoon hammers hitting me on the head like in that special.
Noise, noise, noise!
Wonder why it was never released as a single.
Hey, now there’s an idea. Since Bob Dylan has always sounded like a cat trying to mate with a chupacabra to me, maybe he can do writing from now on and someone more melodious can belt out the tune...
Apparently the North Vietnamese Communists WANTED war because THEY never listened to the message of surrender. Funny that.
Same with the Palestinains, islamists, Communists, Occutard anarchists,...
How about South Korean “Ventures” infused acid rock Christmas tunes?
HE 5 Jingle Bells / In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida medley
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LqWgTKR0ppc
Heavy metal Xmas: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grwP8QvI1jY
Christopher Lee’s Heavy Metal Xmas: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gVzOve8T39w
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.