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Media Mogul Urges Stringent Birth Control
A Semi-News/Semi-Satire from AzConservative ^ | 11 December 2010 | John Semmens

Posted on 12/13/2010 9:15:49 AM PST by John Semmens

Media billionaire Ted Turner urged world leaders to impose a sort of “cap-and-trade” system for live births in order to reduce the global population. Under the Turner plan, each person would be entitled to participate in procreating one child. This right could be sold or used.

“There are just too damn many people,” Turner complained. “Everywhere I go there are crowds of people. A person can’t get any solitude or privacy anymore. We can’t go on like this. We’ve got to put a lid on this thing before it’s too late.”

Turner argued that making the procreative right transferable “would help overcome the reproductive imbalance we see around the globe. Prosperous and intelligent people are having too few children. On the other hand, the stupid and impoverished masses are breeding like rabbits. If we clamp down, yet give them the option of selling their birth rights they can trade their poverty for prosperity by selling to someone who can afford to pay for it.”

“A vigorously enforced plan could halve the population in each succeeding generation,” Turner observed. “In only ten generations we could get the world population down to a more manageable 6 million total. And most of those, I’m betting, would be the offspring of superior stock.”

Turner has five children—a feat he considers “in line with my proposal, inasmuch as I would’ve been willing and able to pay for the privilege if my plan had been in effect.”

(Excerpt) Read more at azconserv1.wordpress.com ...


TOPICS: Government; Health/Medicine; Humor; Society
KEYWORDS: capandtrade; fakebutaccurate; georgiaguidestones; population; reproduction; satire; tedturner
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To: hal ogen

Ted Turner said in 1992 that he wished he could have “unprocreated” (or some other word) his five children, in order to be consistent. They were not amused (they didn’t like their “stepmom” Jane Fonda, either).

“Truth is usually stranger than fiction.”


21 posted on 12/13/2010 10:40:16 AM PST by elcid1970 ("I don't like Islam and I don't trust Muslims.")
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To: Walkingfeather

http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.tedturner.com/returner/turner_ranch_map_web.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.tedturner.com/ranches.asp&h=751&w=906&sz=107&tbnid=aVGf253ps-LZgM:&tbnh=122&tbnw=147&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dted%2Bturners%2Branch&zoom=1&q=ted+turners+ranch&hl=en&usg=__YBDaEqi9cqhfi9-WVzYZQQGKxvE=&sa=X&ei=I2oGTcCmD4a4sQOQ-IXODQ&ved=0CCwQ9QEwAw


22 posted on 12/13/2010 11:03:15 AM PST by Walkingfeather
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To: John Semmens

I always knew he was nut. There should no longer be any doubt.


23 posted on 12/13/2010 2:09:40 PM PST by Wuli
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