Posted on 11/15/2010 3:36:57 PM PST by Charles Henrickson
This has not exactly been a November to Remember for the DUmmies. First came Tsunami Tuesday, when the Republican Red Wave swept across the land, turning DU into Democratic Underwater. Then last week came the Return of Chimpus Khan, reawakening the DUmmies' Bush Derangement Syndrome (BDS), followed closely by the news that those tax breaks for the evil rich will soon become the Bush-OBAMA Tax Cuts. Now, last night, comes the premiere of "The Adventures of Caribou Barbie," aka "Sarah Palin's Alaska," sparking an outbreak of Palin Madness Syndrome (PMS), the natural successor to BDS. Clearly, for the DUmmies, this has not been a November to Remember, but rather a November for Novocaine and Novenas. And the month is only half-over.
Today, then, we see David "Skinner" Allen's DUmmieland take on Sarah Palin's Alaska, here in this THREAD, "Got to say this about Sarah Palin," and this THREAD, "Sarah Palin accused of breaking countryside rules in TV nature show."
So let us put on our hip waders and venture out into the wilds of DUmmieland, in Rogue Rage Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, who can see DUmmieland from his house, is in the [brackets]:
Got to say this about Sarah Palin: She sure is photogenic. I just wish she would stick to something like being a strong voice for the mentally and physically disabled. She would be really good at that.
[If only she would use her powers for good!]
She is a carbuncle on the anus of a camel. . . .
[But at least she is a photogenic carbuncle.]
Maybe if you can turn off her whiny screechy voice.
[Try the Alaskan Femalamute.]
She looks like a cartoon character from the Sunday comics page to me.
[Wasilla Wonder Woman.]
I only know that a lot of guys really think she is hot.
[She's so hot, she baked Alaska!]
I wonder if she can dance?
[With wolves. On glaciers. With a BlackBerry in one hand and a rifle in the other.]
She is a professional pole dancer. . . .
[Right now she's probably polling better than Black Barry.]
Anyone can be photogenic with $$'s of plastic surgery. . . .
[We'll find out next, on "Nancy Pelosi's San Francisco". . . .]
And btw, who the f*** gets that close to bears?
[Tom Vilsack? . . . BEWARE THE BEAR!]
they are intruding far closer into the bear's space than I'd bet even the regs allow on a fishing trip.
[What about that nosy neighbor, Peeping Joe McGinnis, intruding on the Palins' space?]
Sara Palin is a dumbed down version of peat moss.
[DUmmieland is a DUmbed-down version of DKos.]
Sarah Palin accused of breaking countryside rules in TV nature show. . . . the former state governor is seen fishing for salmon with husband Todd and family members. She can be seen apparently holding her rod towards brown bears on the river bank, while the party's boat appears to be closer to the bears than guidelines advise. The Alaska department of fish and game says people in a boat must not fish within 30ft of a bear.
[Boy, when that bear came to where they were already fishing, he must have got to within, oh, 29 feet there for a minute, till they backed off! Criminal! Heinous!]
Maybe one of those bears will eat her and make our lives just a little bit better.
[Here we see an enraged DUmmie engaged in a life-or-death struggle with a Mama Grizzly. . . .]
After one bite she'd be spit back out. Because she's bitter with a terrible texture.
[Mama Gristly.]
I hope one of the bears eats her, but it's impossible to tell from that picture how close she really is. . . .
[It's an optical Aleutian.]
As long as it makes for a good photo op. . . .
[It's a Kodiak moment.]
I wouldn't want the bears to get sick.
[SPARE THE BEAR!]
Now TLC owes the Democratic candidates 8 episodes of free airtime to make it fair.
[Let's see, "Barack Obama's Kenya" . . . no, wait, "Barack Obama's Indonesia" . . . oops! "Barack Obama's Hawai--no, Chicago". . . .]
how come every time Palin opens her "flippin'" mouth and emits some inane tripe, I feel like ripping my ears off?
[Palin Madness Syndrome claims another victim.]
I can hardly wait until she gets tired of Todd and has an affair with a bear.
[Sorry, Peeping Joe McGinnis, no porch porn for you!]
A brown bear can more very quickly, so I'd bet there's a shooter nearby to stop the bear if it moves in the right direction. Sarah may be stupid, but she's no dummy.
[Spoken by someone who's stupid AND a DUmmie!]
BTW, what part of Alaska did they see those bears while fishing? Also I am wondering if Sarah Palin could find out what happened to my Eskimo friend, Fred Duncan who was born in Alaska. I knew him because he was in my school class for a few years in Puerto Rico. I believe he was unique in being the only Eskimo in Puerto Rico. Would like to find the back story on him.
She just might know that. Call it women's Inuition.
LOL!
Ummm, I'd say anybody who wants to? I took these photos when I went to Katmai National Park, Alaska
Thanks!
LOL That pun gland is working overtime!
Most DUmmies would say she's pathogenic.
Piper Palin 2036!!
Juneau, I think you’re absolutely right!! ;-)
Don't let us stop you, drama queen.
There's no misogynist like a "feminist" misogynist.
Another DUFU episode where freeper “fatboy” participates in the featured DUmmy thread with his bogus DUmmy account. Third one since the ‘lection.
Further descending into the bowels of dummyland I have to pause and wonder how the mods in DUmmyhood have packed up their tombstoning chisle because here I am, hundreds of posts and nary a peep from the mods. Never would have happened in the good old days of the DUmmy experience.
How do you do that, sir?
My mole's never been quoted in any DUmmie FUnnies, even if in threads brought over here for our inspection (as we all know, P-J and Charles don't bring the whole entire thing, which is why the link, if one wants to read it in its original glory). My mole must not say anything witty or sensational; I dunno.
By the way, we're coming up--only eight more days--to the nominations for the TOP DUmmies 0F 2010; details to be announced later, in a DUmmie ALERT! embedded in the DUmmie FUnnies near that date.
[It's an optical Aleutian.]
As long as it makes for a good photo op. . . .
[It's a Kodiak moment.]
I wouldn't want the bears to get sick.
[SPARE THE BEAR!]
LOL. You out did your self with this one!
And speaking of Vilsack and the bear. Why DIDNT he wear the bear??
His campaign was an epic fail anyway, so what harm would it have done? In my humble opinion it would have helped! After all, if he would have worn the bear "for the people" what could anyone say he would NOT have done for the people??
It makes perfect sense to me. Missed opportunity for Vilsack for sure!
Nothing is more exciting than seeing your own words in Bolshevik Red on DUFU and Charles figured it out, (Lousy Freeper Troll). What a thrill to be so honored in that way!
Now the secrete to my success is simple. I don't put anything up on DU that could give me away. Last time I did this I got the boot after only 5 posts. Sometimes I write a post and don't hit the post button because there is no way to hide the fact that I'm not one of them. Discretion is key.
Some posts you just know are going to be DUFU material. Look for them and use restraint. Keep them confused about your gender. Never say anything that could tip them off that you are a conservative.
The key is to remember that most of the DUmmies are teenagers. Have fun but don't get carried away. I would love to have a way for us bogus DUmmies get together to refine our approach, maybe construct a manual or guide book for our posting pleasure.
frank, good luck for the future and remember, you have to be in it to win it. Happy posting!!!
I’d like to put a tape on the boat and the bear! LOL
Bwahahaha,good one!
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