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Army’s “Carbon Footprint” Taints War Effort
A Semi-News/Semi-Satire from AzConservative ^ | 17 July 2010 | John Semmens

Posted on 07/17/2010 11:10:57 AM PDT by John Semmens

Representative Gabrielle Giffords (D-Az) took Afghan Commander, General David Petraeus, to task for what she characterized as “willful disregard of the environmental impact of our war effort.”

“There is no policy, no plan to minimize carbon emissions in our military activities,” Giffords charged. “Bombs are dropped and bullets are fired without considering the environmental impact.”

Giffords insisted that she was “not demanding an immediate halt to current military operations in the Middle East. I’m just saying that battle plans should include an environmental impact assessment as a regular part of the process before attacks are launched.”

She also suggested that the Army “put more emphasis on less environmentally damaging methods, like stabbing or clubbing enemy forces in order to minimize the carbon output.”

(Excerpt) Read more at azconserv1.wordpress.com ...


TOPICS: Government; Humor; Military/Veterans; Politics
KEYWORDS: arizona; democrat; environment; satire
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1 posted on 07/17/2010 11:11:03 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

Give me a break. The country is being run by a bunch of fools.


2 posted on 07/17/2010 11:12:17 AM PDT by mia
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To: mia

It’s semi-satirical.


3 posted on 07/17/2010 11:13:37 AM PDT by SnuffaBolshevik
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To: John Semmens

Pleae tell me that this was an SNL sketch.


4 posted on 07/17/2010 11:13:58 AM PDT by Stormdog (A rifle transforms one from subject to Citizen)
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To: John Semmens

Low-Carbon Bacon Grenades?


5 posted on 07/17/2010 11:14:36 AM PDT by PROCON (Independence Day + 13, Let's see how long it lasts!)
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To: SnuffaBolshevik

It is amazing how few see the “Semi-satirical.”

What is worse is that it seems there is no satire that is more ridiculous than the reality of our current government.


6 posted on 07/17/2010 11:20:16 AM PDT by freedumb2003 (The frog who accepts a ride from a scorpion should expect a sting and the phrase "it is my nature.")
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To: John Semmens

>>She also suggested that the Army “put more emphasis on less environmentally damaging methods, like stabbing or clubbing enemy forces in order to minimize the carbon output.”<<

That’s freaking hilarious!


7 posted on 07/17/2010 11:22:58 AM PDT by freedumb2003 (The frog who accepts a ride from a scorpion should expect a sting and the phrase "it is my nature.")
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To: #1CTYankee; 12Gauge687; 14erClimb; 2nd Bn, 11th Mar; 2ndDivisionVet; 3D-JOY; 21twelve; A message; ..

ping


8 posted on 07/17/2010 11:24:16 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: #1CTYankee; 12Gauge687; 14erClimb; 2nd Bn, 11th Mar; 2ndDivisionVet; 3D-JOY; 21twelve; A message; ..

ping


9 posted on 07/17/2010 11:26:38 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

LOL! Good stuff!


10 posted on 07/17/2010 11:27:09 AM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (Holder needs to resign! Now!)
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To: John Semmens

Fooled me for a 2nd until the clubbing part, hee hee. I thought some idiot Congress person actually asked something about the carbon footprint of the Army.


11 posted on 07/17/2010 11:27:21 AM PDT by C19fan
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To: John Semmens

Great. You pinged me twice.

Now I am twice as motivated to read it. LOL


12 posted on 07/17/2010 11:28:04 AM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously... You'll never live through it.)
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To: John Semmens

Next thing you know she’ll be saying that bullets make the world heavier because they’re made of lead and are so very dense.


13 posted on 07/17/2010 11:28:04 AM PDT by philman_36 (Pride breakfasted with plenty, dined with poverty, and supped with infamy. Benjamin Franklin)
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To: John Semmens

maybe they could hand bottles of Hemlock or supply steaks that are “dry rubbed” with the essence of puffer fish?


14 posted on 07/17/2010 11:30:27 AM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously... You'll never live through it.)
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To: mia

This woman is a prime candidate for being institutionalized in the Medical Lake facility near Spokane.


15 posted on 07/17/2010 11:30:32 AM PDT by Parmy
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To: John Semmens

How about listing the 10 most recent Presidents....

....and then listing THEIR estimated carbon footprint?

You KNOW Obama is the WORST EVER.


16 posted on 07/17/2010 11:32:05 AM PDT by cookcounty ("Today's White House reporters seem one ball short of a ping pong scrimmage.")
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To: John Semmens

We have GOT to get these idiots out of positions of power!


17 posted on 07/17/2010 11:33:02 AM PDT by 23 Everest (Zero, Glittering Jewel of Colossal Ignorance.)
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To: John Semmens

That is rich. I don’t think I have EVER read anything more humorous on this site. I believe this is the worst thing that could possibly happen. Nothing that I have heard before is worse than this. This is really far reaching even for Democrats.


18 posted on 07/17/2010 11:35:12 AM PDT by napscoordinator
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To: cookcounty

That last line almost.. almost made me pee my pants! Thanks for the laugh.. heaven knows they are getting harder to come by.


19 posted on 07/17/2010 11:35:45 AM PDT by pnut22
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To: John Semmens

I believed it....that tells more about our government than it does about me.


20 posted on 07/17/2010 11:36:34 AM PDT by napscoordinator
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