Joseph P. Kennedy III on the right
Posted on 02/28/2010 6:56:22 PM PST by TheVitaminPress
Massachusetts- For the last twenty four hours rumors have been pervading the internet and blogoshphere that Joseph P. Kennedy III, Grandson of RFK and namesake of the Kennedy scion, is seriously considering a run for congress. The response to this possibility has been largely positive but there are those out there who are not convinced that the young man from Boston has what it takes to live up to the hollowed and universally respected Kennedy name. “I’m just not convinced that this young man from Boston has what it takes to live up to the hollowed and universally respected Kennedy name,” Sage Pinebrush, political analyst and spokesperson for the environmental action group People Establishing Nature In Society, informed The Vitamin Press. “I mean think about it,” Sagebrush continued, “This guy is 29 years old and has never killed anyone, raped anyone, compromised national security by sleeping with an agent of the KGB, or had one of his children lobotomized to further his political career; are we really sure he’s a Kennedy?”
A spokesperson for the Kennedy clan, however, has assured The Vitamin Press that what the Joseph P. lacks in experience he makes up for in enthusiasm. “Ok sure he may be a little bit green around the gills but this kid has what it takes to make a great Kennedy. It’s a long time till November and he is just getting out there everyday and meeting people, shaking hands, kissing babies and planning just the sort of crime that would get anyone else locked up for the rest of their lives but will -in his case- establish his bonafides and assure him an elected position in the federal government forever. Besides . . . a little history here folks . . . remember that not even JFK came into the political arena knowing how to steal elections or make problem mistresses disappear, those were things Papa Joe had to teach him.”
Agreed.
Don’t forget stealing elections, lobotomizing children, getting punked out by the Soviets and -possibly- killing Marilyn Monroe.
Haha, the resemblance is uncanny.
Thanks the story on our website has been updated to reflect this most recent development. It reads thusly:
Update: The Vitamin Press has just learned that Joseph P. Kennedy III will not be seeking congressional office this November. Our sources are confirming that he was not interested in pursuing any course of action that might deter from his goal of becoming Conan O’Brien’s stunt double when he moves to Fox this fall. Special thanks to La Lydia for bringing this most recent development to our attention.
He’s not running. He made a statement today.
Thanks for the update!
No doubt Teddy was an awful human being, but -at least in terms of horrible things done in a given lifetime- I think Joe might have been worse.
Funny!
I'll give you the "hollowed" part (as opposed to hallowed) but universally respected? In what universe?
TY :)
Joseph P. Kennedy III on the right
Of course the writer meant "Hallowed" but "Hollowed" is actually correct as to the Kennedy's. There is nothing in them.
Hey, who is that guy standing next to Conan?
Not one that I want to be visiting anytime soon.
“Hey, who is that guy standing next to Conan?”
That’s John L. Siegenthaler
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Seigenthaler
“hollowed”....freudian slip???
I had to check the source to make sure that it was hallowed, not hollowed...
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