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22 Million Bush White House E-Mails Found (BDS Lib Dream)
Western Hero ^ | 16 Dec 09 | Foutsc

Posted on 12/16/2009 4:17:04 PM PST by foutsc

Dick Cheney Must Be Behind It!

Computer experts have recovered 22 million Bush White House e-mails previously thought lost or destroyed (22 million!) and Bush foes who had filed lawsuits to have them handed over are jubilant.

WASHINGTON (AP) - Computer technicians have found 22 million missing White House e-mails from the administration of President George W. Bush, according to two groups that are settling lawsuits they filed over the failure by the Bush White House to install an electronic record keeping system.
Bush haters have been devouring the e-mails like a pack of ravenous wolves.  One Cheney e-mail to the president has them particularly excited:
Well, George, I'm off to my secret, underground, undisclosed torture chamber.  Got a fresh shipment of jihadis in and I want to test out the new cattle prod.  The bullwhip just ain't cutting it anymore.  I want 'em pissin' their pants when I get my torture on!  Bwahahahahaha!  -- Dick
White House Manipulated Gas Prices
Other e-mail traffic reveals the source of the gasoline price spike in 2007:  President Bush accidentally bumped the secret dial under his desk that he used to control global petroleum prices.

He had purposely turned it down in 2004 to get reelected, then dialed it back up afterward to reward his Big Oil cronies.  But he apparently got excited while eavesdropping on an ordinary citizen's phone call to Sweden and slammed his knee into the dial.  The impact was so severe he had to give up mountain biking for a week. 

Despite that, he didn't realize what he'd done until campaign money began gushing in from corrupt oil companies with thank you notes attached.  The event prompted this e-mail to the energy secretary:
Hey Tater! Damn, still can't believe I did that...  Can we blame the gas price increase on France?  Just askin'  heh heh heh...  -- The Decider
More Embarrassing E-Mails
There are supposedly other embarrassing e-mails, including one where the former president compares Nancy Pelosi to a washed up drag queen and threatens to lasso Keith Olbermann and pull him behind his horse like Ben Cartwright did to a bad guy on a Bonanza episode.

It is also rumored that in one piquant missive, Vice President Cheney offered to "Butcher that fatass Michael Moore like the hog that he is," and unfavorably compared Senator John Kerry to a flaccid male appendage, but that has yet to be confirmed.

Don't believe me?  Go read the story here:  Breitbart


TOPICS: Government; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: bush; bushderangement; emails

1 posted on 12/16/2009 4:17:04 PM PST by foutsc
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To: foutsc

That’s right. I knew he was hiding something all along. And now America can finally get to the bottom of this.


2 posted on 12/16/2009 4:19:25 PM PST by writer33 (Rush Limbaugh Is "The Passion" of Conservatism And Pretty Good At That Radio Thingy)
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To: foutsc

Apparently people in the Bush White House had a sense of humor.


3 posted on 12/16/2009 4:20:40 PM PST by w1andsodidwe (Jimmy Carter(the Godfather of Terror) allowed radical Islam to get a foothold in Iran.)
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To: writer33

what about Obama’s blackberry?


4 posted on 12/16/2009 4:21:07 PM PST by RummyChick
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To: writer33
LOL yep all those constituents, and democRat underground hate mails.
5 posted on 12/16/2009 4:22:04 PM PST by boomop1
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To: RummyChick

You’re right. I think we need to dig until it hurts.


6 posted on 12/16/2009 4:22:30 PM PST by writer33 (Rush Limbaugh Is "The Passion" of Conservatism And Pretty Good At That Radio Thingy)
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To: boomop1

Yep, bring out Court TV and the circus. We’ll get that conviction. LOL!


7 posted on 12/16/2009 4:23:36 PM PST by writer33 (Rush Limbaugh Is "The Passion" of Conservatism And Pretty Good At That Radio Thingy)
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To: foutsc

Cheney is in trouble, he forgot the /sarc tag.


8 posted on 12/16/2009 4:23:54 PM PST by Doomonyou (Let them eat Lead. Bonus tag line: FAIL 246, Obama 0)
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To: writer33

Had omarosa been hiding the emails in her caboose all this time?


9 posted on 12/16/2009 4:26:29 PM PST by Carley (OBAMA IS A MALEVOLENT FORCE IN THE WORLD)
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To: RummyChick

Yeah, when can I sue the government for the Blackberry records?


10 posted on 12/16/2009 4:48:43 PM PST by autumnraine (You can't fix stupid, but you can vote it out!)
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To: foutsc

I want to see the e-mails of the EPA and Generation Investment Management concerning global warming.


11 posted on 12/16/2009 4:50:59 PM PST by FlyVet
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To: Carley
Had omarosa been hiding the emails in her caboose all this time?

Yep, time for body cavity searches!

12 posted on 12/16/2009 5:06:38 PM PST by writer33 (Rush Limbaugh Is "The Passion" of Conservatism And Pretty Good At That Radio Thingy)
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To: foutsc

22M “I hate Bush” emails from their website.

Give me a break, I hope they enjoy reading their own emails.


13 posted on 12/16/2009 5:07:00 PM PST by dila813
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To: foutsc
Good news for Al Queda — and its allies.
14 posted on 12/16/2009 5:20:59 PM PST by BenLurkin
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To: BenLurkin

When can we expect Obama to release his?

Truth for thee and not for thine.


15 posted on 12/16/2009 5:23:33 PM PST by BenKenobi
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