Posted on 01/22/2009 7:41:36 PM PST by This Just In
COOKING FOR ONE.
WELCOME BACK TO Herbs Cooking for One. Im Al, filling in for Herb, whos got some sort of botulism or trichinosis thing going on, but hell be just fine in a few days.
So anyway, were all about cooking things guys like to eat, right? And so what were going to cook tonight is one of my favorites, and I know its a favorite with a lot of guys out there. Its called Scrambled Eggs, and its not too hard to make once you get some practice.
So dont be afraid to try along with me. Hey, were here to have fun, right?
Now the first thing you need is some eggs. And its really helpful if you know where eggs come from. I was looking all over for them in the Foodland yesterday, and finally I had to ask. So this assistant manager guy, who looks like hes about fourteen, tells me theyre over in the dairy case, with the milk and the cheese. Well, thats just ridiculous, isnt it? I mean, its not like cows lay eggs. Eggs come from chickens last time I checked, pal. (Thats what I told him. Smartmouth little dribble-nosed punk.) They should be with the meat, next to the chicken breasts and the buffalo wings. By the way, buffalo wings come from chickens, not buffalo. Thats another thing I learned yesterday.
So here we have some eggs, which come from the dairy case for some stupid reason, and what Im going to do is Im going to crack them and put the insides in this bowl. You can crack them however you like, but I like to give them a good sharp rap on the edge of the counter like this. Now, you see, that one ended up on the floor. Sometimes they end up on the floor. Thats okay, thats why you have a dog. Well try again. There. Now we dump the goop into this bowl, and a little bit of shell got in there, but thats okay, you can pick it out. Actually, its usually easier to pick out the shells after its cooked, because then you dont have to stick your fingers in that goop. Now Im going to do the same thing two more times, so we have three eggs in there. Two, three.
Okay, so now weve got the eggs in the bowl, and its time to scramble them, because thats why this is called Scrambled Eggs. Now, some people have an electric mixer for this. I dont, but I do have this power drill with a 32-millimeter flat wood bit, and thats just as good. So I just put the drill in the bowl and [---inaudible---] guess thats why most people dont use drills. But I can fix that counter later with some spackle or something. Anyway, we can rescue most of the eggs by just brushing them off the counter into this other bowl. Its always a good idea to have another bowl in case something happens to your first one. I found that out a long time ago.
So now what we need is a frying pan. I got this one at the dollar store, and it looks just fine to me. You dont need fancy equipment to be a gourmet cook, although maybe you should have an electric mixer. As you can see, Ive had this over the stove for a while now, and we just pour the eggs from the bowl into here. Whoa! Look at them sizzle! thats what I call cooking!
So we can just let them go at it for a while, but it doesnt take very long. Just watch. Are you watching? See, what you want to look for is you want the goop to stop being goopy. As soon as the top stuff isnt goopy anymore, its done. Just got to wait a minute. A little more. Just a little more. And there! You see! Its not goopy anymore. So now what you do is take it off the stove OH JEEZ LOUISE well I guess I should have said to use a towel or something. A little vitamin E will fix that right up. Anyway, so I get a towel and wrap it around my hand, and I take the pan off the stove. Now Ive set out a plate here on the counter, and what Im going to do is scrape the eggs out of the pan onto the plate like this. What you want to do is make sure the yellow stuff on top separates neatly from the black stuff on the bottom, which is the part you dont want to eat. Then you can throw away the pan, because its no good anymore, which is why I always buy my pans at the dollar store. Now, doesnt that look nice? I like my eggs with a little salt. Right now Im out of salt, but Ive got some baking soda here, and thats sodium too, so Ill just sprinkle a teaspoon or so on. And enjoy!
Well, thats all we have time for. Im Al for Herbs Cooking for One, saying what Herb always says, which is Remember, cooking is for guys, too. Herb will be back with you next week if hes lucky. Meanwhile, keep cooking, guys! Good night.
I hope your wife makes a full recovery soon. I am sure she appreciates the cooking. Unfortunately, there a number of husbands I know personally that wouldn’t do as much for their wives.
Thanks for your concern. She is doing very well. It has been about 4 weeks since the surgery, and we expect in a couple more she will be ready for physical therapy.
Best regards,
Texas Fossil
I have seen meatloaf in a mug. What a concept. You can eat your meal AND drink your ale all at once.
Reminds me of those jars of peanut butter/jelly. I’m quite confident a man invented that ingenious condiment.
ROFL!
I switched to egg beaters....still get the noise but the mess is much smaller!
Other than that its the drive thru all the way!
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