Pacifists Create Non-Violent Alternative to Fireworks

DotPenn.com ^ | July 4, 2008 | Sven Waring

[SvenWaring]

State College’s pacifist community is offering an alternative to the warlike displays of fireworks, barbecues and beer-fueled fistfights that have become synonymous with Fourth of July festivities.

The group, Peaceful State, has created Non-violent Resistance and Solidarity Fest, as a peaceful way to celebrate the mid-summer holiday. Since the group does not recognize the existence of the United States, Isreal, and the Aborigine Occupation Zone in Australia, there is no mention of Independence Day or revolution, except in the context of struggle against capitalism and Prince’s former band. Garrison Kegger, who created the concept, said the event gets underway with a vegan non-barbecue featuring tofu burgers wamed on a solar cooker and served with a dandelion salad. “The taste is so-so,” Kegger said. “But the feeling in your soul that no living thing was harmed in the making of your lunch is delicious. Oh, except the dandelions. And those damn flies.”

[A Balrog of Morgoth]

This is satire, right?

[SvenWaring]

It’s satire, but as we like to say: Why let the facts get in the way of the truth.

[elcid1970]

Truth is usually stranger than fiction.

But good satire like this tempts the reader to think it true, especially the part about the Aboriginal Occupation zone.

;^)

[sig226]

I like this onje a little more. :)

Aid Recipients Celebrate Dependence Day

. . . Barkhard makes sure there’s lots of food, too, by making a special food stamp run to the grocery store.

“Those food stamps sure comes in handy during celebrations,” Barkhard said. “Most times I just trade them for booze, because we don’t get any booze stamps, yet. But we do have a Democratic congress, so we’ll keep hoping.”

[bray]

Never seen a fistfight at a 4th Celebration. My BBQ ribs are going to make that tofu burger taste like toefungus.

Pray for W and Our Freedom Fighters