Zombie attacks might increase due to global warming, study shows

http://wmbriggs.com/blog/2008/01/31/zombie-attacks-might-increase-due-to-global-warming-study-shows/ ^ | William M Briggs

[mattstat]

A new study by scientists has suggested that zombie attacks might increase if the current projections of global warming are realized. “If the earth gets warmer, it means longer springs, summers, and falls, and shorter winters,” said John Carpenter-Romero, Ph.D., a zombie-ologist who co-authored the study. “And shorter winters means more time for the undead to prey on the populace.”

Dr. Harrister, the other co-author, and head of Zombie Robotics at Wayward Robot, Inc., explained that cold winters typically stalled the walking dead. “It is well known that zombies can’t operate in cold weather. It freezes their brains.”

The pair calculated a 32.782412% increase in zombie attacks if CO2 increased to twice its pre-industrial rate. “Clearly, this is a very troubling result,” said Dr. Harrister, “If we don’t do something soon, the streets will be filled with blood.”

[Tax-chick]

Good luck! The temperature is in the upper 30’s here, so we’re not going to have ice, at least. (Although I need to buy some on the way home - our ice maker is toast.)

[Lonesome in Massachussets]

The pair calculated a 32.782412% using a water cooled slide rule.

[Darksheare]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oj76NXpEww8

[bamahead]

The only thing that could make this thread more awesome is ninja priates.

[Slings and Arrows]

This thread has now officially reached the awesomeness limit. No further awesomeness is possible without the universe collapsing into a black hole of awesome.

[dennisw]

Just DANG!!!!!!!!!

[libs_kma]

And remember, zombies vote Democrat!

[ZULU]

Zombies are the most serious problem to stike the world since the penis stealing witches of Islamic Africa!!!

[Monkey Face]

*yawn*
I’m here.

*stretch*

I think.

[Darksheare]

All is as it should be.

[darkangel82]

G’morning.

[Aloysius88]

Hi! Remember me? I just stumbled into this zombie thread and -surprise!- I found you guys. I got here just in time for the weather report. 4” of Global Warming on the front porch with more coming. Today’s seminar canceled and 2 peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in my belly- life is good, praise God.

[darkangel82]

We don’t get that kind of global warming here, just the liquid kind, often with thunder and lightning.

[Aloysius88]

Oh well. Late to the party again. Good hunting to you all and see you around.

[Aloysius88]

Oh hi. I didn’t see you there. Where is there?

[jetson]

"Quick, get the stake, John has gone zombie!"

[darkangel82]

Florida, although you’d never know it with the weather here the past few months.

[DungeonMaster]

My kids have got to see this thread!

[Aloysius88]

I’m north of Detroit and we are getting some real winter here.

[darkangel82]

I used to live in Ohio. Three words: Lake-effect snow.