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DUmmie FUnnies 11-03-06 (DUmmies Blow Up Over NY Times Nuke Bomb Story)
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | November 3, 2006 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 11/03/2006 5:23:38 AM PST by PJ-Comix

What a coincidence! The New York Times publishes a story claiming that the release of secret Iraqi documents includes sensitive nuclear reasearch secrets from Iraq's 1996 FFCD Full, Final, and Complete Declaration (FFCD-F). However this same information was already dispersed to the member states of the International Atomic Energy Agency (IAEA) which number 142 including Iran. So there was no information released that wasn't already known earlier. You can quickly get up to speed on this by reading the posting of Freeper JVERITAS on the Free Republic. And since the New York Times has now publicized these Iraqi documents which it pretty much ignored before, folks might note that the same document also show that Saddam Hussein was in the process of REBUILDING his nuclear weapons program which means we were justified in overthrowing his regime. Thanx for that little service there, NY Times, even though you really meant to hurt the EVIL Republicans in the upcoming elections. Of course, the DUmmies are now jubilant over the New York Times aid to the Democrats, little realizing that this publicity SHOWS that Saddam took a PERSONAL interest in rebuilding nuclear WMDs as you can see in this THREAD with the somewhat desperate title of "***RED F*CKING ALERT*** WHAT COULD BE MORE IMPORTANT - *** EVERYONE HERE SHOULD READ THIS (PLEASE)." So let us now watch the DUmmies celebrate the election boomerang tossed out there by the New York Times in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, watching the DUmmies attempt to kick Lucy's nuclear football once again, is in the [brackets]:

***RED F*CKING ALERT*** WHAT COULD BE MORE IMPORTANT - *** EVERYONE HERE SHOULD READ THIS (PLEASE)

[PLEASE! PLEASE! SAVE US FROM THE EVIL REPUBLICANS!!!]

BUSH ADMIN POSTED NUCLEAR BOMB BUILDING GUIDE ON INTERNET…

[IAEA DISPERSED THE SAME NUCLEAR "BOMB BUILDING GUIDE" TO 142 NATIONS.]

We have lost nearly 3,000 of our beloved soldiers because of the threat of Iraq having WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION and NOW the Bush administration is f*cking PUBLISHING "nuclear bombs for dummies" on the internet??????

[I'm PUBLISHING DUmmies for DUmmies on the internet. Among the published facts is that the IAEA already distributed the same info.]

Holy shit. Do we realize the significance of this?!!@#$!!! If we don't jump on this with everything we got -- then we DESERVE everything we get.

[All political as the New York Times intended it to be.]

ROFL!!! MY GOD, THE REPUKES ARE GOING TO CATCH HELL FOR THIS!!!

[Take a long running kick at Lucy's football because those same documents show that Saddam was personally planning to rebuild Iraq's nuclear program.]

Yep...who's to say that this isn't the reason N. Korea got the bomb?

[They read the widely distributed IAEA documents?]

The timing would actually be just right, wouldn't it?

[Yeah. Isn't it surprising about the timing of this release by the NY Times just a few days before the election.]

Stress - PRE-1991 nuclear research! This has NOTHING to do with post-Gulf War ALLEGED activities by Iraq.

[Yes. Let us just forget the inconvenient part of those SAME documents that show that in Jan. 2001 that Saddam was personally involved in REBUILDING his nuclear program which proves we were justified in overthrowing his regime.]

If anything will kick off Impeachment later this will be it!

[John Conyers is already preparing his broom closet for the impeachment hearings.]

This is so UNBELIEVABLY HUGE, that I'm having heart palpitations.

[Which will turn into a heart attack late on the night of Nov. 7.]

10:1 odds says that the "liberal" media says something to this extent: "A lot of this information was widey available already on the internet. Does it really even make a difference if our enemies found this new information?"

[You mean like at the IAEA WEBSITE?]

WE NEED A WEEKEND FULL OF "MUSHROOM CLOUD" TV ADS! ARE YOU DEM MEDIA CONSULTANTS PAYING ATTENTION?

[Don't worry. The Republicans will probably show those mushroom cloud TV ads to demonstrate that Saddam was planning on rebuilding his nuclear weapons program just like those SAME documents said.]

Lets see Rove spin this one.

[It was all a secret Rovian plot to publicize the fact that Saddam was planning on rebuilding his nuclear weapons program.]

The information on how to build a bomb has been out there, freely available in libraries across the country for years and decades now, if you knew what you were doing. Hell, back in the seventies a kid from Ohio ginned up a working model of a bomb as a high school project from information he acquired from various local libraries. Yes, the Pentagon, NRC, DOE and others freaked, but they also said that the kid had done such a good job that all he need was some plutonium. Whether or not Bush put this info out there is immaterial. If a person really wanted to build a bomb, and had training in nuclear physics, they could do so whether or not these documents were released. Yes, the irony is delicious, but the threat is overblown. You would have to remove virtually every single bit of information on nuclear physics if you are that worried, and frankly that's not going to happen.

[And this DUmmie WINS a nuclear powered Kewpie Doll for having a brief moment of mental clarity before he is tombstoned from DUmmieland!]

It might be that these are fairly sophisticated circuits, etc. But having worked in the nuclear industry, knowing what is freely available in the public arena, I stand by my statement. If it wasn't illegal, I would be willing to bet a great deal of money that I could build a bomb within a year using only publicly available documents. Hell, if you have a decent size university nearby, go stroll through their nuclear physics section in their library and see just how detailed these matters get. Again, it isn't the knowlege, or lack there of that is preventing people from building a bomb, it is lack of plutonium that is keeping the bombs out of the hands of ordinary citizens. Hell, go look at the Hiroshima and Nagasaki bombs, they are really quite simple instruments.

[And soon to be tombstoned DUmmie madHound gives us an encore performance of rare DUmmieland RATIONALITY.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dummies; freudenschade; nytimes
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To: eyespysomething
Schaedenfreude, ain't it grand to see

You're good-time face again.

(Apologies to Thomas Pynchon.)

21 posted on 11/03/2006 5:41:01 AM PST by Paul Heinzman (So long, mom, I'm off to drop the bomb, so don't wait up for me.)
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To: PJ-Comix

**The timing would actually be just right, wouldn't it?**

Of course. But the NYT is unbiased...


22 posted on 11/03/2006 5:41:45 AM PST by ilovew ("I was born an American; I will live an American; I shall die an American." --Daniel Webster)
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To: kevkrom
Someone set DUmb up the bomb.
What you say?

zot with great justice.

23 posted on 11/03/2006 5:42:26 AM PST by NeoCaveman (Kerry slanders our soldiers.....again)
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To: prairiebreeze
I seem to recall that back in the early 1990's, this sort of information was par for the course on Usenet. I learned how to make all sorts of interesting things from text files on newsgroups.

Making a bomb is not difficult, if you have the right parts. The difficulty is getting a hold of the enriched uranium required.

Regards, Ivan

24 posted on 11/03/2006 5:45:12 AM PST by MadIvan (I aim to misbehave.)
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To: PJ-Comix

**This is so UNBELIEVABLY HUGE, that I'm having heart palpitations**

Sheesh...don't die. Or...well...I wouldn't be that upset.


25 posted on 11/03/2006 5:45:13 AM PST by ilovew ("I was born an American; I will live an American; I shall die an American." --Daniel Webster)
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To: NeoCaveman
If the bomb that drops on DU
Gets their friends and neighbors too
Then there'll be no DUmmies left behind to grieve.
26 posted on 11/03/2006 5:46:22 AM PST by Paul Heinzman (So long, mom, I'm off to drop the bomb, so don't wait up for me.)
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To: Paul Heinzman
I got an e-mail from Pynchon just now, he said your verse is okay as long as we post the "flashenfreude" graphic:


27 posted on 11/03/2006 5:47:31 AM PST by Petronski (CNN is an insidiously treasonous, enemy propaganda organ.)
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To: kevkrom
The DUmmies have gone nuclear and there's still four days to go before the election.

I think their going to suffer a premature meltdown.

28 posted on 11/03/2006 5:48:43 AM PST by Paul Heinzman (So long, mom, I'm off to drop the bomb, so don't wait up for me.)
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To: PJ-Comix

It frightens me that these people vote.


29 posted on 11/03/2006 5:53:13 AM PST by samiam1972 (Live simply so that others may simply live!)
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To: PJ-Comix

LOL, my office mate told me how to build a nuclear bomb. Don't remember if it was a hydrogen or which one, but he said the part that people can't do is get the nuclear material.


30 posted on 11/03/2006 5:53:34 AM PST by eyespysomething (Thou whoreson impudent embossed rascal!)
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To: Petronski

That reminds me, it's getting close to time to put out my Fitzmas decorations.


31 posted on 11/03/2006 5:53:45 AM PST by Paul Heinzman (So long, mom, I'm off to drop the bomb, so don't wait up for me.)
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To: PJ-Comix
If anything will kick off Impeachment later this will be it!

Hmmmm, who's going to hold the football for them?

32 posted on 11/03/2006 5:58:09 AM PST by Paul Heinzman (So long, mom, I'm off to drop the bomb, so don't wait up for me.)
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To: eyespysomething
MacGiver taught us how to make a nuclear bomb out of a pair of toenail clippers and a smoke detector

That was a hugh series.

33 posted on 11/03/2006 6:01:14 AM PST by Paul Heinzman (So long, mom, I'm off to drop the bomb, so don't wait up for me.)
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To: samiam1972

It frightens you? Ugh...I've spent way too much time over there. I'm afraid I'm gonna suddenly start shrieking about Halliburton and Karl Rove in the middle of the street one day.


34 posted on 11/03/2006 6:07:01 AM PST by ilovew ("I was born an American; I will live an American; I shall die an American." --Daniel Webster)
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To: Paul Heinzman

It was a hugh series!


35 posted on 11/03/2006 6:08:03 AM PST by eyespysomething (Thou whoreson impudent embossed rascal!)
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To: Paul Heinzman

Lucy ping!


36 posted on 11/03/2006 6:09:24 AM PST by The Right Stuff
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To: PJ-Comix


USMCex.
When it absolutely, positively
must be there overnight.

37 posted on 11/03/2006 6:15:49 AM PST by Lazamataz (I love you.... but not in a gay way.)
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To: PJ-Comix
But having worked in the nuclear industry,

So, am I to believe that this DUmmy learned how to design and construct a nuclear bomb in his spare time when he wasn't tending to his duties of vacuuming the floors and emptying the waste baskets at a nuclear power plant?

If he's telling the truth at least he has been gainfully employed at some point in his otherwise wasted life, no doubt a unique experience for a denizen of DUmmyland.

38 posted on 11/03/2006 6:18:33 AM PST by epow
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To: Paul Heinzman
I think their going to suffer a premature meltdown.

More like prematuure Iraq ululation.

39 posted on 11/03/2006 6:20:26 AM PST by kevkrom (John F'n Kerry's 'apology': "I'm sorry you were too stupid to realize I wasn't calling you stupid.")
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To: Paul Heinzman

This was a big gamble by the NY Times. They are gambling that people will be outraged by the publication of nuke info that has been out there for years but hoping that people won't notice that the SAME DOCUMENTS show that Saddam was planning to REBUILD his nuclear weapons weapons program. Last time I checked, nukes are WMD. IOW, the documents show we were justified in overthrowing Saddam because he was planning on rebuilding his nuke WMDs.


40 posted on 11/03/2006 6:21:08 AM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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