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DUmmie FUnnies 10-18-06 ("Are you as sick of religious fundamentalism as I am?")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | October 18, 2006 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 10/18/2006 7:01:09 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

We can now see the theme of the Democrat October Surprise or rather October Surprises. They are designed to keep church going folks from voting at the polls this November. The first October Surprise, launched prematurely because of an overanxious Blog run by a RAT operative, was Foleygate. Supposedly because Mark Foley had gay non-sex via e-mail and IMs, this is supposed to keep outraged religious folks from supporting Republicans. Unfortunately, as I stated, Foleygate broke several weeks too soon and is already fading as a factor. The second October Surprise was the "convenient" October publication (even though he admitted the publication date was originally set for 2007) of David Kuo's book in which he urges Christians to take a breather from politics which really means taking a break from voting for Republicans. So what do the Democrats REALLY think of the religious folks that they refer to as "fundies?" They won't say it out loud but it isn't hard to find the TRUTH in the Leftwing blogosphere such as DUmmieland where this THREAD authored by DUmmie Philosoraptor explains perfectly their real attitude via the title, "Are you as sick of religious fundamentalism as I am?" So let us now watch the REAL attitude of the Left towards "fundies" in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, thanking DUmmie Philosoraptor and Co. for their brutal honesty in exposing themselves, is in the [brackets]:

Are you as sick of religious fundamentalism as I am?

[Shh! Didn't you get the Democrat talking points memo about PRETENDING to feel sympathetic towards church going folks...until after the election?]

These people are disgusting, and they've been shoving that shit down my throat for too f*cking long now and I am flat out f*cking tired of it.

[If you dare to change your religion they will kill you. The "they" are the Muslims in their own countries where switching from Islam is a capital offense.]

I have these people in my family, thank god they are the rare kind, born again Democrats who hate bush, but my bro and his wife are dead on zombie Jesus bush voting zombies.

[DUmmie Philosoraptor must be such a joy to be around during family dinners.]

These fanatics endanger us all, literally, I've been saying it for 30 years now, that's how long my family members have been converted to the cult, and it is a cult, as are all religions.

[Is that also how long you've been confined to the RUbber Room?]

Are we to allow a cult to conquer America right before our eyes? Are we to just roll our eyes and be polite when these f*ckers shove this shit right down our throats like Spanish inquisitors?

[DUmmie Philosoraptor is burning so red hot that I will have to shield myself with the David Kuo book urging Christians to turn the reins of power over to the DUmmiecrats by not voting.]

They are too dumb to chew gum, but they can get out and vote for nazis by the millions, and this makes them intolerable to a free America.

[Exercising the right to vote is intolerable if you don't vote the way DUmmie Philosoraptor wants.]

They are scared to death of crazy Islamists, and so am I, but they are the exact same thing, they participate in the exact same madness, and they perpetuate the exact same ancient hatreds and slights and they threaten the United States in the exact same way as the Taliban crazies, they worship the exact same god, and they think the exact same way.

[How many suicide Christian fundamentalists piloted planes to crash into large buildings?]

And they are trying to take over our nation, and when you say that to the average guy on the street they don't believe you, its too fantastic, too sci fi, too implausible.

[Perhaps they don't believe you, DUmmie Philosoraptor, because of that Happy Farms strait jacket you are wearing.]

I'm f*cking sick of them, and my parents and my brother and sis in law know better than to talk that religio-political bullshit to my face, cause they'll get a red hot rant right up their asses every time.

[Nice psychopathic family hatred thing you have going there, DUmmie Philosoraptor.]

I'm tired of being polite to them on the street, I'm tired of kissing their ass and giving them breaks because they are good Christian people, f*ck them and the cross they rode in on.

[FEEL the love! Now on to the equally loony comments from DUmmie Philosoraptor's fellow DUmmies...]

F?ck them cowardly, sheepish, dumb, bastids and bastidettes!

[Kindly wipe that rabid foam from the floor before exiting the Rubber Room.]

I am sick and tired of their claiming that only they have a truth, partly based on 1500 yr old faerie tails, and partly based on great old fictional literature that was stolen, borrowed, begs, copied and mistranslated from the earliers societies and sects, hitite, egyptian, canaan and others.

[Meanwhile the DUmmies completely buy into creating their own alternate realities, faux Hopi Indian visions, and astrology.]

it will be interesting to see what happens to them as the millenium progresses and there is no rapture and jesus doesn't come back. and by way of clarification -- i am christian.

[And by way of clarification -- you have a rainbow flag symbol on your post, DUmmie xchrom.]

If I were ever going to go back to christianity, I would go UU as they support pagans and polys, of which I am both. I've known a UU minister who presided over a (non-legal) marriage of four. Not my quad nor my current group. We went to my pagan priest for the first one (it was a kickass ceremony but the marriage not so much)and we're all living in sin in the second one. Even if the government would allow either one of us to marry and they will not, we would probably decline this time around. I'm not much of a ring wearer and none of us can agree on a necklace. I suppose we could do some kind of bracelet. I will have to bring that one up in the next family meeting. Of course, we need to finish our trial period of a year and a day first, anyway.

[Thank you for sharing way too much information with us.]

i'm drawing more pan-theism into my personal faith. i've always had a streak of the old religion in my thinking /spirituality.

[Theology...DUmmie style.]

I was raised Southern Baptist but too much of it didn't make sense. My grandfather (my grandparents raised me) always said I thought too much for my own good and I guess I did think a lot but not too much for my own good. I've been out of the cult for nearly 25 years now. I'm not an athiest though, I do believe in a higher power just not the jealous God of my youth. Yahweh does not play well with others so he isn't allowed in my metaphysical sandbox.

[Nobody else is allowed in your sandbox since you've been in mental solitary confinement for years.]

Yes, and that's why I've decided to...persecute Christians. At every opportunity. All of them, even the nice ones. Oh, I'll do it nicely to the nice ones, but I'll be nasty to the nasty ones.

[Why do I get the image here of Norman Bates sitting in a jail cell as he thinks to himself with his mother's voice?]

Believe whatever you like fundies, just stay the hell away from my civil liberties.

Sorry, touchy subject this week thanks to my fundie relatives...who still insist I'm no legitimate minister despite an advanced degree in divinity studies and an ordination. Apparently I'm not fit to bless the bounty at the Thanksgiving table. Whatever.

[Do your "fundie" relatives also claim that your sanity isn't legitimate?]

I'm going to lock this. With regard to religion (or the lack thereof), Democratic Underground is a diverse community which includes Christians, Jews, Buddhists, Muslims, Hindus, Atheists, Agnostics, and others. All are welcome here. For this reason, we expect members to make an extra effort to be sensitive to different religious beliefs, and to show respect to members who hold different religious beliefs. Members are welcome to discuss whether they agree or disagree with particular religious beliefs, but they are expected to do so in a relatively sensitive and respectful manner. As a general rule, discussions about ideas are usually permitted, but broad-brush bigoted statements about groups of people — either religious or non-religious — are not.

best,
wakemeupwhenitsover
DU Moderator

[Too late, DUmmie Moderator wakemeupwhenitsover. You can lock up this thread but I've already unlocked the TRUE DUmmie (and general leftwing) attitude towards the "fundies" in this edition of the DUmmie FUnnies.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: antichristian; atheismandstate; atheismisareligion; christianbashing; dummies; liberalbigot; religion; religiousintolerance
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To: jiggyboy
I am a Christian but I don't know any fundies. Are there really that many out there?

The "Fundy" is a nearly mythical beast intended to scare people into voting democrat.
41 posted on 10/18/2006 7:42:53 AM PDT by cripplecreek (If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?)
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To: PJ-Comix

I keep forgetting, am I supposed to be a Fundie this week or a Neo-con? Where's my memo from the all-powerful Rove?


42 posted on 10/18/2006 7:45:40 AM PDT by kevkrom (War is not about proportionality. Knitting is about proportionality. War is about winning.)
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To: Charles Henrickson
They both had been drinking before the game, and they CONTINUED to drink constantly until they left two hours later

You're describing the entire infield of the Indy 500.

43 posted on 10/18/2006 7:46:00 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix
Are you as sick of religious fundamentalism as I am?

These people are disgusting, and they've been shoving that shit down my throat for too f*cking long now and I am flat out f*cking tired of it.

These fanatics endanger us all, literally, I've been saying it for 30 years now, that's how long my family members have been converted to the cult, and it is a cult, as are all religions.

Are we to allow a cult to conquer America right before our eyes? Are we to just roll our eyes and be polite when these f*ckers shove this shit right down our throats like Spanish inquisitors?

They are too dumb to chew gum, but they can get out and vote for nazis by the millions, and this makes them intolerable to a free America.

And they are trying to take over our nation, and when you say that to the average guy on the street they don't believe you, its too fantastic, too sci fi, too implausible.

If only they realized that it would be more sane to think this way about Muslim "religious fundamentalists" instead...

44 posted on 10/18/2006 7:46:24 AM PDT by jiggyboy (Ten per cent of poll respondents are either lying or insane)
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To: PJ-Comix

Are you sure you didn't get these quotes from the Evo-threads?


45 posted on 10/18/2006 7:47:55 AM PDT by Sam's Army (Imagine a world without car commercials.)
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To: Lx
So-called "geometric" arrangements, which are described by the number of people involved and their relationship connections. Examples include "triads" and "quads", along with "V" and "N" geometries. The connecting member of a V relationship is sometimes referred to as a "hinge" or "pivot", and the partners thereby indirectly connected are referred to as the "arms". The arm partners are not as closely bonded to each other as each arm partner is to the pivot. This can be contrasted with a "triangle", in which all partners are directly connected and all are bonded to each other with comparable strength. A triad could be either a V or a triangle.

So says wikipedia regarding such a four person sexual arrangement.

46 posted on 10/18/2006 7:50:07 AM PDT by wideawake ("The nation which forgets its defenders will itself be forgotten." - Calvin Coolidge)
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To: PJ-Comix
Eeeewwww!

Kind of blows the lid off of the idea that same sex marriage is not really about changing traditional marriage....

47 posted on 10/18/2006 7:51:13 AM PDT by Tuscaloosa Goldfinch (good fences make good neighbors!)
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To: wideawake
So says wikipedia regarding such a four person sexual arrangement.

It sounds more like an engineering blueprint than a marriage.

48 posted on 10/18/2006 7:55:07 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: Lx

UU = Unitarian Universalist.


49 posted on 10/18/2006 7:57:16 AM PDT by wideawake ("The nation which forgets its defenders will itself be forgotten." - Calvin Coolidge)
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To: PJ-Comix; Watery Tart
Are we to just roll our eyes and be polite when these f*ckers shove this shit right down our throats like Spanish inquisitors?

NOBODY expects the Spanish inquisitors! Our chief weapon is surprise . . . Rovember surprise and religious re-education camps. . . . Our two weapons are Rovember surprise and religious re-education camps . . . and cameras in the bedrooms. . . . Our THREE . . . no. . . . AMONGST our weapons--amongst our weaponry. . . . I'll come in again. . . .

NOBODY expects the Spanish inquisitors! Amongst our weaponry are such diverse elements as. . . .

50 posted on 10/18/2006 7:57:16 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Religious Re-education Director, Camp Rummy)
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To: PJ-Comix
1500 yr old faerie tails

Am I really the first one with the "Is that you, BenBurch?" line?

51 posted on 10/18/2006 7:58:27 AM PDT by shezza (God bless our military heroes)
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To: PJ-Comix
Yes, and that's why I've decided to...persecute Christians. At every opportunity. All of them, even the nice ones. Oh, I'll do it nicely to the nice ones, but I'll be nasty to the nasty ones.

Funny, but remember this. Many think this way and see the Christians as a bigger threat than islam.

52 posted on 10/18/2006 7:59:54 AM PDT by redgolum ("God is dead" -- Nietzsche. "Nietzsche is dead" -- God.)
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To: PJ-Comix
they can get out and vote for nazis by the millions, and this makes them intolerable to a free America.

See the irony inherent in the DUmmies!

53 posted on 10/18/2006 8:00:03 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (No tolerance for Christians!)
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To: Charles Henrickson
Isn't that (using the "f" word in public) illegal? I think most cities have statutes prohibiting the use of that word. It would be nice if those statutes were enforced.

I seem to remember someone being arrested recently in Minnesota for saying that out on a lake within the hearing distance of children.

54 posted on 10/18/2006 8:01:49 AM PDT by Tuscaloosa Goldfinch (good fences make good neighbors!)
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To: MichiganConservative
Thank you.

So, are we to expect the Massachusetts legislature to legalize 'quad' marriage any time soon?

55 posted on 10/18/2006 8:02:19 AM PDT by Lx (Do you like it, do you like it. Scott? I call it Mr. and Mrs. Tennerman chili.)
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To: PJ-Comix
They are scared to death of crazy Islamists, and so am I, but they are the exact same thing, they participate in the exact same madness. . . .

"Gotta go now, hon! Time for blowing-myself-up lessons down at church!"

56 posted on 10/18/2006 8:03:09 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Let's see, who should I blow myself up by TODAY?)
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To: PJ-Comix
At first, then you realize that all the "triad" is is one person doubletiming two people and the two people, instead of having the self-respect to dump that person, acquiesce in the cheating.

Sounds like engineering, looks like spinelessness.

57 posted on 10/18/2006 8:03:21 AM PDT by wideawake ("The nation which forgets its defenders will itself be forgotten." - Calvin Coolidge)
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To: PJ-Comix

Thanks for the definition. Most "fundies" hear the word "quad" and start to have loving thoughts of knobby tires and lots of mud...


58 posted on 10/18/2006 8:03:57 AM PDT by Hegemony Cricket (Expect a lot of democrat poll-smoking between now and 11/7)
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To: wideawake
Ummm, I didn't realize my marriage was so old-fashioned.

These must be the same people that see the 'sacred math' in crop circles.

59 posted on 10/18/2006 8:04:29 AM PDT by Lx (Do you like it, do you like it. Scott? I call it Mr. and Mrs. Tennerman chili.)
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To: Charles Henrickson
What the well-dressed fundie Christian Taliban inquisitors are wearing these days...

60 posted on 10/18/2006 8:05:40 AM PDT by shezza (God bless our military heroes)
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