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DUmmie FUnnies 09-07-05 ("I KNOW That There Is No God! Here's Why")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | September 7, 2005 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 09/07/2005 3:37:18 PM PDT by PJ-Comix

I bet some of you have occasionally tried to describe the level of insanity of the DUmmies to your skeptical friends. Perhaps they can't believe that anybody could be as nutty as you describe. If so, then perhaps you should refer them to this DUmmie THREAD titled, "I KNOW That There Is No God! Here's Why." As you will see, the level of DUmmie HATRED of George Bush has gone even beyond psychopathic levels. In fact the author of this particular thread, DUmmie DistressedAmerican, needs to not only consult with a shrink, but needs to be paid a little visit from the Secret Service. As usual, the psychopathic DUmmie rantings are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, mopping rabid DUmmie foam off the floor, is in the [brackets]:

I KNOW That There Is No God! Here's Why.

[WARNING! PATHETIC PSYCHOPATHIC RANT TO FOLLOW!]

Bush still breathes.
Bush still stands.
Bush still walks.
Bush still has power.
Bush is still rich.
Bush's parents also still doing all of the above.
IN SHORT:
Bush has not been SMOTE!
Any God worth his salt would have killed the bastard and his entire evil family years ago. I think a bolt of lightening would do the job quite nicely.
OK, Maybe I am wrong. Maybe He does exist but fears we will invade heaven of he rids us of this evil, sociopath! If this is indeed the case:
God, Now is your time. They still haven't the resources to come after you. Strike him down! Show me some of that old shool (testament) WRATH!

[If you think the rage of DUmmie DistressedAmerican is beyond belief now, imagine how it will be when he finds himself screaming this stuff at the prison walls. He is flat out calling for the murder of the President. A federal crime.]

Well, He works in mysterious ways, you know.... Maybe the smiting is just around the corner.

[DUmmie Ron_Green in a hopeful mood.]

I believe the disaster was proof enough Either God is a useless observer like all of us, incompetent and without any power to stop horrible things from happening, or he/she is an asshole that allows or causes these horrible things to happen for his/her own reason and we are meant to suffer for them ignorant of why.I really don't know how else to think of it. I'm sure many will be upset with these thoughts but really truly, without saying any "He works in mysterious ways" nonsense how can you say that there is some deity in charge worthy of love and worship? God is love? Well god let people die all over the South. No prayers were answered by the people who begged for mercy and continue to beg.

[A DUmmie "theologian" weighs in.]

Here's how I knew - Crimson Tide. I knew there was no 'God' (as taught to me by our culture, anyway) when I realized that a merciful, intelligent-designing, loving, all-powerful, supremely perfect deity would not have designed women to bleed for 7 days a month in order to be fertile. WTF is THAT about?!Doesn't sound like intelligent design to me.I can't wait until it is scientifically eradicated. I suspect this has been possible for decades, but, for some reason, our little birth control packets still mercifully allow 7 blank days so our Aunt from Alabama can come to visit.If this god was so intelligent, we would just have an egg sit there until it got fertilized, not be shed every month. Nevermind the whole concept. Until I realized how you got pregnant, I thought women just *decided* when they would have a baby, and that was all that was necessary. Understandably, I have been a little miffed at 'nature' since.

[I have to give this DUmmie atheist credit for creativity. First time I ever heard of someone becoming an atheist because of menstruation.]

If God wants all the credit and adoration. Then he can bloody well pitch in like the rest of us. When the least of us -- the poor, the elderly, the babies -- have to pay with their lives for the failure of government or someone else's sins, that's just mindlessly cruel. If there are consequences then perhaps its time for those in charge to start paying them.

[So who do you blame for Hurricane Katrina. God or Bush? Probably both.]

Bush is the entire reason that I don't believe in Karma

[Because you always end up as the DUmmie Coyote as the Bush RoadRunner leaves you in his dust. BEEP! BEEP!]

Tell God I Have Been Workig My Ass Off To Rid Us Of This Guy. Time for Him to help me. I'm helping myself.Where is my backup?

[Windsurfing off Nantucket.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: antichristian; atheism; atheists; bushhaters; callawaaambulance; dummies; god; neworleansblame; religion; religiousintolerance; waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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I propose the DEATH PENALTY for ANYONE using their cellphones in libraries. Yeah, I know all the libraries have rules against folks talking on their cellphones but that doesn't stop them from BLABBING LOUDLY on their cellphones. Just a little while ago, some IDIOT was blabbering on his cellphone in the computer room of this library. Finally I turned to him and said, "Doesn't it bother you at all that everyone in this room has to put up with your DAMN phone conversation." The guy quickly left but why do people need to reminded that you DON'T USE YOUR CELLPHONE IN THE LIBRARY!!! Okay, forgive my little rant here but such an infraction is at the top of my pet peeves.

Let me know if you want on the DUmmie FUnnies PING LIST.

1 posted on 09/07/2005 3:37:19 PM PDT by PJ-Comix
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To: PJ-Comix

1st, just because I always wanted to do this.


2 posted on 09/07/2005 3:38:57 PM PDT by kingu (Draft Fmr Senator Fred Thompson for '08.)
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To: PJ-Comix

In!


3 posted on 09/07/2005 3:39:31 PM PDT by Xenalyte (Lord, I apologize . . . and be with the starving pygmies in New Guinea amen.)
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To: PJ-Comix

4th?


4 posted on 09/07/2005 3:39:59 PM PDT by Starter (No comment.)
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To: Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; tje; ml1954; ...

PING!


5 posted on 09/07/2005 3:39:59 PM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

Wow.

Getting your period doesn't rule, but it never made me lose my religion or anything.


6 posted on 09/07/2005 3:41:01 PM PDT by Xenalyte (Lord, I apologize . . . and be with the starving pygmies in New Guinea amen.)
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To: Xenalyte
for some reason, our little birth control packets still mercifully allow 7 blank days so our Aunt from Alabama can come to visit.

Is that a Crimson Tide reference?

7 posted on 09/07/2005 3:42:24 PM PDT by darkangel82
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To: PJ-Comix
I find this to be an appropriate description of those sneaky DUmmies. Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
8 posted on 09/07/2005 3:44:29 PM PDT by cripplecreek (If you must obey your party, may your chains rest lightly upon your shoulders.)
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To: PJ-Comix
If God wants all the credit and adoration. Then he can bloody well pitch in like the rest of us. When the least of us -- the poor, the elderly, the crybabies --

Hate to even reprint their blasphemous nonsense but figured that would at least make it more accurate.

9 posted on 09/07/2005 3:44:32 PM PDT by carlr
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To: PJ-Comix

top 10?


10 posted on 09/07/2005 3:45:26 PM PDT by Shazbot29 (muhammed was the most evil person ever to live. May he burn in hell forever)
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To: PJ-Comix
Bush is the entire reason that I don't believe in Karma

See, they're looking at this the wrong way. Bush is proof that Karma exists. Since they blame Bush for everything, including just about anything you can imagine that they make up, he gets a free ride on anything he really does blow because everyone's too busy blaming him for stuff he couldn't possibly have done.
11 posted on 09/07/2005 3:45:47 PM PDT by kingu (Draft Fmr Senator Fred Thompson for '08.)
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To: PJ-Comix

It's sad that people like this have so much hatred that it causes them to deny God.


12 posted on 09/07/2005 3:46:10 PM PDT by SaveTheChief ("Kittens give Morbo gas.")
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To: darkangel82

It sure is!


13 posted on 09/07/2005 3:47:35 PM PDT by Xenalyte (Lord, I apologize . . . and be with the starving pygmies in New Guinea amen.)
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To: PJ-Comix

"Aunt from Alabama"? Heh heh heh - good line! I'll have to use it sometime, even if it DID come from a DUmmie!


14 posted on 09/07/2005 3:48:15 PM PDT by Purrcival (Ray Nagin, you are NO Rudy Giuliani!)
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To: PJ-Comix

"Bush has not been SMOTE" ?

Wrong tense for that verb, I think. Should it be "smitten"? "Has not been smitten"? Actually, he was "smitten" with Laura Welch many years ago, with their long marriage and twin daughters as evidence.


15 posted on 09/07/2005 3:50:02 PM PDT by Purrcival (Ray Nagin, you are NO Rudy Giuliani!)
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To: darkangel82

Yes, that would be a Crimson Tide reference.


16 posted on 09/07/2005 3:51:06 PM PDT by Purrcival (Ray Nagin, you are NO Rudy Giuliani!)
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To: PJ-Comix
the author of this particular thread, DUmmie DistressedAmerican, needs to not only consult with a shrink, but needs to be paid a little visit from the Secret Service.

Bush has not been SMOTE

Do you suppose the Secret Service could bring an emergency remedial English teacher? ;-)

17 posted on 09/07/2005 3:51:32 PM PDT by maryz
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To: PJ-Comix

Poor PJ! You need a (((hug))) just for having to go to the library computer room in the first place, much less have to listen to some hugh maroon tell everyone in the room how important he is just because he has a cell phone! LOL!


18 posted on 09/07/2005 3:53:02 PM PDT by luvie (Thank God that George W. Bush is President during this horrible Hurricane crisis!)
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To: PJ-Comix

top 25...


19 posted on 09/07/2005 3:53:15 PM PDT by MikefromOhio (Ohio State vs. Texarse (NL), Sept 10th)
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To: PJ-Comix
Aren't those hippies just special? There's at least 3,549 times the word "karma" is used.

Hippies have a defect, where their brain seizes (seizures) onto buzzwords and they repeat them over and over and over.

20 posted on 09/07/2005 3:53:41 PM PDT by JoJo Gunn (Help control the Leftist population. Have them spayed or neutered. ©)
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