DUmmie FUnnies 05-23-05 (Andy Stephenson vs Laura Ingraham)

DUmmie FUnnies ^ | May 23, 2005 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

[PJ-Comix]

There is currently a total lockdown on posts about Andy Stephenson (except what he posts about himself) in DUmmieland. Anything posted about the AndyScam situation is immediately tossed down the DUmmie memory hole. Meanwhile the Inner Party Member O’Brien of DUmmieland, Pied Piper Pitt, has reversed himself yet again after expressing strong doubts about Andy’s cancer. The latest directive is that Andy has pancreatic cancer. Andy has ALWAYS had pancreatic cancer. Yes, Pitt. Oceana is at war with Eastasia. Oceana has ALWAYS been at war with East Asia. Pitt/O’Brien has put his four fingers up before us and told us that he is holding up five fingers because the state says he is holding up five fingers as in this infamous Pitt/O’Brien statement explaining why Andy has ALWAYS had pancreatic cancer: “It's true because I say so. It's true because thousands of others say so.” And like the world of 1984, DUmmieland also has many Hate rallies. One such Hate Rally in particular is memorable because the target, Laura Ingraham, really does have cancer, unlike Andy who only has pancreatic cancer in an alternate reality. So why is DUmmie invective directed at Laura Ingraham? Simple. Because she is GUILTY of Thought Crimes. Meanwhile Andy Stephenson is given a complete pass from all skepticism because Pitt/O’Brien has decreed that his four fingers are really five. So let us now look at how the DUmmies treat a REAL victim of cancer who happens to be a conservative in this DUmmie THREAD titled, “Laura Ingraham has breast cancer.” As usual the DUmmie Hate Rally screechings are in Ingsoc/Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, viewing the proceedings from Room 101, is in the [brackets]:

Laura Ingraham has breast cancer. Let's keep her in our prayers

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!! Your normal human sympathy plus your low post count gives you away!]

Cancer isn't a good thing, but it's her problem. I fell no obligation to pray for people who make the world worse.

[A normal reaction…for a DUmmie.]

Lucifer has cancer...please include him in your prayers. David Duke has cancer please pray for him. Liberal Andy has been diagnosed with cancer...if I do pray...I will pray for him.

[Correction: Liberal Andy does NOT have pancreatic cancer. However, you don’t have to pray for him. Just send in your money.]

She has to muster what few shreds of her life are not based on lies and evil and fight this on her own.

[Speaking of based on lies… How is Andy’s NON-EXISTENT pancreatic cancer?]

i hope she has to declare bankruptsy and see's how the other side lives!!

[At least she won’t be hitting up folks for PayPal payments for a PHONY pancreatic cancer operation.]

Of course we wish the best for her in this fight.

[Huh? This doesn’t seem like the typical DUmmie expression of non-sympathy for Laura. Must read more from this poster…]

I have been a Democrat for a long time, and part of the Democratic principles that attracted me as a young person and kept me a Democrat all these years is our compassion. Democrats are simply good and decent people. And good and decent people want everyone to do well -- those who agree with them and those who do not. We fight for the right of voices with which we disagree to speak out, for the right of people to say things we don't believe to be true, even for the right to be malicious and mean-spirited. If we fight for the right for LI to say what she says, how in the world can we use our disagreement with those words as an excuse not to be compassionate in her fight with cancer. Being willing to have her voice muted by illness is the same thing as not wanting her voice to be heard. It is not Democratic or democratic.

[Too rational here. DOES NOT COMPUTE! Must read more from this mystery poster…]

I hope others will join me in wishing her Godspeed in this fight, for the easiest road that she can have, and even for the development of compassion about others who have faced hardship and disease without the support network she -- and I -- have. As I go through treatment for this same disease, I think often about the women who fight breast cancer without health insurance, without a supportive husband, with a physically demanding job that doesn't know or doesn't care that she is exhausted and weak and aching, with children but no child care. I find it absolutely impossible that LI won't also have those thoughts run through her head or that she won't rethink her position on health care or the social safety net. Pray for her health AND her enlightenment, if you must. But pray, with me, for her good health.

[Praying for Laura’s good health? That will put you at odds with the vast majority of the DUmmies. And, lo and behold, this “mystery poster” turns out to be none other than Elizabeth Edwards herself. Nice of you to express sympathy towards Laura, Elizabeth. However, you might get an education into DUmmie hatred by reading their sicko posts on this thread. As to your own medical problems, the EVIL FASCISTS on the Free Republic had nothing but sympathy and good wishes for you as you can see on this Freeper THREAD.]

Elizabeth, you are clearly a terrific person and of a type who is the Soul of the Democratic Party. But what we Democrats need now, as we face the greatest threat to the Constitution of the United States since the Civil War (perhaps EVER, when viewed from the angle of Caesar Bush crossing the Rubicon), are some Hard and Tough and MEAN Warriors.

[“MEAN.” That certainly describes the DUmmies. Continue DUmmie tom_paine…]

And that, by necessity, requires hardening of the heart. It might not be right but if the choice is hard heart to insure restoration of Free America, then I will choose Hard Heart every time.

[Cold heart too. Continue DUmmie tom_paine…]

And no disrespect to your kindness and decency, but when have these Bushevik Monsters EVER shown us anything of the sort?

[Um…Did you check the Freeper thread posted above you, DUmmie tom_paine? Continue with your spew…]

Maybe it was when they used the Wellstone Funeral as grotesque political tool in 2002.

[Oh, so it was the REPUBLICANS who used the Wellstone funeral as a grotesque political tool? Nice rewrite of history. Maybe you tossed the video of the actual funeral down the Memory Hole.]

You may be able to retain your good will towards these monsters. I cannot.

[Thank you for that enlightening castigation of Elizabeth Edwards for urging sympathy for Laura Ingraham, DUmmie tom_paine.]

But we lose our credibility as advocates for decency and truth if we say hateful things about her vulnerability to a disease.

[DUmmieland lost its credibility a long time ago, Mrs. Edwards.]

But I cannot in good conscience pray for the health of someone who has abetted UnAmerican Totalitarianism with all of her heart.

[But did you in good conscience send in your money to someone who has abetted a FRAUD with all his heart?]

She Probably Gave it to Herself...All that Hate, Lies, Anger...

[Lies…Something Scamdy with his non-existent pancreatic cancer is very familiar with.]

F*ck Laura Ingrahm. F*ck her.

[Elizabeth Edwards asks for sympathy towards Laura Ingraham and this is the DUmmie reply.]

You want me to pray for her? Yech. How about you want me to pray for Hitler? No, not going to do it. No, not Stalin either. How about you want me to pray for Osama Bin Ladin? Not probably going to happen. Rush Limbaugh? Hannity? Medvid (Medvidiot)? O'Really? Rupert? The Bush family? Naw.... My best is going for Andy.

[Your best goes to Andy who is FAKING his disease. Interesting.]

But those who spout hatred on a regular basis often manifest that hatred in themselves. And this may have happened in Laura Ingraham's case.

[So what happened in Andy’s case? Ooops! Just remembered. He does NOT have pancreatic cancer.]

I can't believe the shit I am reading here.

[And this DUmmie wins a Kewpie doll for having a brief moment of mental clarity.]

These comments on DU are absolutely predictable. Every time someone with whom we disagree has a health problem or dies, the celebration begins.....

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

She's got all of konservative amerika praying for her. Who's praying for the single parent with cancer, or anyone else not in the media limelight for that matter? Those are the people I pray for. People like her sold their souls to the devil to get where they are. Let Lucifer comfort her in her time of trial and tribulation.

[Phew! Two DUmmie threads in a row before yours displaying some normality. Thank you for bringing this discussion back to its normal Dummie hate level.]

But when a person has that much hatred, it often manifests itself in physical ailments. For example, my first wife had so much hatred against me and resentment against society in general for the way she was treated for being a lesbian, she died of heart and kidney failure at age 46.

[Um… I could ask why you married a lesbian but since this is DUmmieland I guess it is not considered unusual.]

I didn't shed a tear for Barbara Olsen and I won't work up too much sympathy for Ingraham. Karma's a bitch, ain't it?

[Will Scamdy be saying that when he gets the handcuffs slapped on him this Thursday at Johns Hopkins.]

Couldn't have happened to a kinder, sweeter, more gentle...HARPY!!!!! It would be absolutely terrible if she choked on her own vomit while under anesthesia!!! I'm praying, I'm praying, I'm praying...

[Note to Elizabeth Edwards: The above is a comment from a TYPICAL DUmmie.]

I'm sick of reading these comments on a daily basis. And I, for one, am leaving permanently.

[A DUmmie sees the LIGHT and, as a result, LEAVES Dummieland.]

Locking......This discussion has run its course. DU Moderator.

[The Truths HURTS which is why you are also locking all Scamdy threads too.]

[decal]

Just the thing I was saying to my GOOD friend Benedict XVI, or as he likes to be called, Bennie...

[PJ-Comix]

Amazingly, in DUmmie history they believe it was the REPUBLICANS who somehow took over the Wellstone funeral and politicized it.

[franksolich]

DUMMIE ALERT!

DUMMIE ALERT!

TIME ERODING, SLIP-SLIDING, AWAY!

3,480 MINUTES UNTIL ANDY GOES UNDER THE GAS AT JOHNS HOPKINS!

DUMMIE "FLYARM," FRIEND OF ANDY, SHOPS IN FLORIDA WHILE FRIEND ANDY SUFFERS IN MARYLAND!

DUMMIETTE "sfexpat2000" USING FLAT PLASTIC RECTANGLES ALL OVER THE PLACE, BUT NOT FOR CASH ADVANCES TO SAVE FRIEND ANDY'S LIFE!

DUMMIETTE "sfexpat2000," FRIEND OF ANDY, MEMBER OF THE GREEN PARTY, A CONSPICUOUS, PROMISCUOUS, PROLIFIC CONSUMER!

LIKES TO OWN THINGS MADE OF EARTH-POLLUTING SUBSTANCES, NON-RENEWABLE ENERGY-BASED, AND THE MORE, THE BETTER!

FRIEND OF ANDY THE NEW IMELDA MARCOS?

[MisterRepublican]

Hey, y'all. I just this minute finished a "channeling" (a la Shirley McClain) session with one of my psychic (and slightly BPD) ex-girlfriends.

So I'm setting there enjoying a pleasant and witty repartee with the lovely and affable Donna Reed when a certain Mr. Orwell hacks the "channel" and starts an utterly dismal conversation concerning totalitarianism and vicious inside gossip about several publishing types from the early 30s...

Anyway, GO goes on and on and finally gets to the point (BTW GO doesn't care much for computers either but he said the free porn available online would make a believer out of anyone) and tells me he likes what he sees here.

He appreciates the "1984" references (although GO says his personal favorite of all his works is his first novel, "Down And Out In Paris And London", and when I asked him to explain he started mumbling about Spain and a girl named Maria and then he turned all cryptic on me so don't ask) and he said he believes PJ will become rich and famous with all this (Mary, are you listening? We're talking a prediction from Mr. Orwell, here! Gold, I tell you GOLD!).

Any way, after I thanked him for his input on the Andy Stephenson Situation™, I continued my "channel" with the lovely and affable Donna Reed, which the unusually pessimistic and grumpy Mr. Orwell had so callously interrupted.

[PJ-Comix]

Just the thing I was saying to my GOOD friend Benedict XVI, or as he likes to be called, Bennie...

Soooo....I was talking to the Pope whom I personally met. A real swell guy. I liked him a lot but HER I wasn't crazy about.

[luvie]

I am sooooooooo far behind--but keep the pings coming! Looks like the DUmmies are just bogus greeners and tree-huggers! They like stuff, too! LOL! As for compassion, Andy be da****, full credit cards ahead!

[Roscoe Karns]

...........
" Tell me another story about.......................................... "Sigh."
Peter O'Toole, Mr Vidal. Pweeese!"

[PJ-Comix]

When I was a kid I saw "From Here To Eternity" on the tube. I couldn't figure out why soldiers were paying Donna Reed money to TALK to them alone in a room. So I asked my father and he told me it was because Donna Reed was portraying a prostitute. For several years, I continued to think that guys paid prostitutes just to talk to them in private in a room.

[SCALEMAN]

Well from what you have said and not said, you have left us with the impression that this person has knowledge of/or was complicit in illegal acts, or thinks this might be so.

[Purrcival]

"Expensive renovations" at Termite's home? How does that happen when he and Undie are not "gainfully employed"?

Let me see, how could that be? I wonder...

[franksolich]

You're probably wondering right, madam.

[SCALEMAN]

For several years, I continued to think that guys paid prostitutes just to talk to them in private in a room.

Don't they? Am I missing out on something else?

[beckysueb]

They wouldn't have had to go to all that work (quilts, marches, ashes) if they would have just stopped screwing each other sans protection.

And particularly in the nether regions which God created for a far different purpose.

[beckysueb]

. I wish I were 20 years older and had known him back when.

Yeah, I just bet you do! (smirk)

[NonLinear]

Here we are at the bar: "DA's RFD." From left to right: Brainshrub, Scubed, Hoot-n-Holler, William Rivers Pitt, MrScorpio and Estimated Prophet.

URL:
http://www.brainshrub.com/adventures/inauguration2005/index.htm

[speed_addiction]

Well from what you have said and not said, you have left us with the impression that this person has knowledge of/or was complicit in illegal acts, or thinks this might be so.

If I had been even periferally involved in this trainwreck and saw how things were going, I would be getting nervous enough to see what my options were, legit or not, just from how it looks. It would in fact be imprudemt not to.

[beckysueb]

Apparently Undie is on initials basis with Gore Vidal:

I may be wrong but I still have a feeling Undie is one of those people who love to name drop and impress. I had a brother-in-law like that once. Of course, all his name dropping was all lies.

[Purrcival]

"obviuos"=obvious

Spell-check is for sissies.

[MisterRepublican]

Mr. Comix, I must request that you refrain from impugning the memory of my dear, dear friend. We spoke of the episode that you describe and she informed me that she had taken the role on bad advice from her manager, Robert "Frenchie" Sandringham, and that she regretted it immediately and fired Frenchie soon afterward.

[speed_addiction]

From left to right: Brainshrub, Scubed, Hoot-n-Holler, William Rivers Pitt, MrScorpio and Estimated Prophet.

Again, Will Pitt has a cigarette in his mouth like he has in almost every pic of himself. If anyone should be dying from cancer, it should be Will Pitt with his obvious 3 pack a day habit!