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DUmmie FUnnies 04-19-05 ("Blaming widespread 'faulty' voting machines is bad for Democrats")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | April 19, 2005 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 04/19/2005 6:06:23 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

An unquestioned tenet of DUmmie faith is that the 2004 election was stolen by the EVIL Republicans using the infamous Black Box Voting machines. At least that belief has held fast in DUmmieland until now when DUmmie ProudToBeLiberal presented the heretical thought that maybe, just maybe, the Republicans won the election fair and square as you can see in this THREAD titled, “Blaming widespread ‘faulty’ voting machines is bad for Democrats.” Of course DUmmie ProudToBeLiberal was publicly burned at the stake for this extreme heresy. So let us now look at ProudToBeLiberal face the flames of the DUmmie Inquisition. As usual the accusations of the DUmmie Torquemadas are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble corresondent, watching the auto de fe atop a Diebold machine, is in the [brackets]:

Blaming widespread "faulty" voting machines is bad for Democrats. It is bad for Democrats on so many levels. One it disenfranchise Democrats. This idea of blaming it on BBV puts down people. It makes people helpless and makes them give up.

[And could you give up some money for Bev Harris? She is just $10 away from discovering vote fraud. Continue verging on slight reality DUmmie ProudToBeLiberal…]

I already see the evil tentacles of BBV grabbing hold of people on DU.

[The evil tentacles of the Rovian Octopus spread far and wide. Hee! Hee! Continue…]

We have to accept responsibility that we lost, not because of some "widespread faulty voting machines" but that the other side outplayed us in campaigning. We just have to try harder.

[HERETIC! For this blatant violation of the DUmmie Faith, I sentence you to be burned at the stake, DUmmie ProudToBeLiberal!!!]

Don't let this notion of BBV take away your motivation and your will to win.

[The Diebold machines are already set and ready for the 2006 elections so why bother voting. And now let us watch your fellow DUmmies burn you at the stake for your extreme heresy, DUmmie ProudToBeLiberal.]

Where I helped in Sandusky OH, botched recount, a person on the BOE there said the touch screen machines (used in other places) should all be smashed! He knew they were no good. Paper ballots, hand counted at the precinct level, is the only way to restore faith in the Democratic process.

[And yet the liberals just after the 2000 election were all screaming for those touch screen machines. Go figure.]

It's not our responsibility to accept "that we lost". America lost. We need to step up and DEMAND ACCOUNTABILITY FOR ELECTION FRAUD/THEFT.

[Yes. Do that. Such demands always provide great comedy material for the DUmmie FUnnies. Would you like an autographed copy of the DUmmie FUnnies book (with CD-ROM insert for the related comix stories)?]

Sorry, But It's Not Who Votes But Who COUNTS THE VOTES. there is only one reason for these machines to suck so bad. Now, we just have to figure a way to PROVE it in a court of law.

[That part of proving it in a court of law does tend to be an annoying little detail.]

I'm arguing that blaming on some abstract idea is bad for Democrats, as the reason stated above.

[Yes. It makes the Democrats look like tinfoil hat conspiracy loons which is why they should continue with the BBV shtick.]

Shhh.....let's pretend it didn't happen. Let's be good little Dems now!

[Yes. Be good little Democrats and accept the results of Diebold…with Karl Rove working the dials behind the machine curtains.]

Nothings wrong with wanting a paper trail. I actually advocate a paper trail; however, some people go beyond that by blaming the loss of the presidential election on "widespread faulty voting machines." We have to take responsibilty that we lost because the other side campaigned better than us.

[Okay, DUmmie ProudToBeLiberal. I’ve tolerated your heresy long enough and have been holding this in thus far. However, you have gone far beyond the bounds of irrational thought so here goes: LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

No... we lost the election because FL and OH were stolen. The machines weren't "faulty", they were rigged. And those who refuse to see it still think the earth is flat. Eventually this will all come out.

[Bev Harris is just $10 away from bringing this out. Send money. NOW!!!]

oh now they are "rigged"...So according to you Dean's 50 state strategy doesn't matter because the voting machines are rigged. according to you voting doesn't matter because the voting machines are rigged. according to you contributing and campaigning doesn't matter because the voting machines are rigged. According to you we just give up participating in civic and political life because the it doesn't matter the voting machines are rigged. We should just sit on our lazy asses and watch the sun go around the world. I see. Now I know what this BBV is all about.

[No, DUmmie ProudToBeLiberal. You should sit on your lazy asses in front of your computer screens and rage loudly into the night as is now being done.]

Do some more homework; your idealism will be seriously challenged. We ALL must work to stop the counting of votes and the control of election technology and processes, by private corporations in thrall to the radical right wealth in the USA. My two Euros...

[And here is a $3 bill in change.]

Oh I see people with different viewpoints don't matter no wonder people think Democrats are elitist. I on the otherhand welsome other views AND disgreements. Political discourse makes the world go round. When the day comes that a single voice is stifled that will be the day when democracy ends.

[You sound entirely too rational, DUmmie ProudToBeLiberal. Let the Tombstoning ceremony begin!]

hush up the fact bush stole election, dont want to depress dem? is that it. well. k. lets all be quiet, lke i told myself prior to this election, they stole 2000, she just dont think about it and maybe they wont do it 2004. oops, they did. k pretend it didnt happen to not depress the dem vote,...........for 2006???? nope. truth has to be told. lite of the day. gotta be fix, or we dont win

[When will the English translation of your rant be available, DUmmie seabeyond?]

There's the risk that Democrats will fail to work in future elections feeling it is futile.

[It is futile. ALL your Diebolds belong to US.]

Locking. This has digressed into a flamefest.

[Spoilsport Moderator! DUmmie flamefests are FUN to watch. Now where am I going to roast my weenies and marshmallows?]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: bbv; childleftbehind; crybaby; dummies; hateamericafilth; hatingamerica
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Have you ever boarded a passenger jet for a long flight WITHOUT some good reading material? You are letting yourself in for some severe ennui since airline magazines are notorious for their boredorm. I think airline magazine writers are instructed to remove all creativity out of their writing. Anyway, on this theme I had an interesting dream last night...

In my dream I saw a man rushing into an airport bookstore. He wanted to pick up something to read before his flight. In front of him, on the book rack, he saw several current events type books with titles like: "Federal Reserve Policy in the 21st Century," "Jumpin' Jim Jeffords: Master Political Strategist," and "Analysis of Lutheran Voting Patterns in the Midwest." Just before he was about to collapse from a yawning fit, his eyes alighted upon a book with a yellow background featuring a smiling, cigar smoking beaver in front of a computer screen showing wacky DUmmie threads in their forum. Yes, it was the DUmmie FUnnies book (with CD-ROM insert for the related comix stories). Immediately the guy's eyes lit up and he bought a copy.

A little while later he was aboard his flight, laughing like hell at the material. All around him, his fellow passengers are eying him curiously. Then when he slipped the CD-ROM insert into his laptop computer their curiousity turned to envy as the guy laughed so hard tears were rolling down his face. A few furtive glances revealed such scenes as Chimpus Khan leading his rightwing Ape army into the desert to battle the liberal bastion of Helmsleep. Word aboard the jet quickly spread that the wildly laughing guy was reading a book called "DUmmie FUnnies" and the passengers vowed to get themselves a copy as soon as their plane landed.

Well now, via that dream sequence, I have actually had a window into the future to gaze upon the cover design of the DUMmie FUnnies book. I have taken note of it and it WILL be used for the book cover. Now all that has to happen to make it all a REALITY is for Mary Matalin to contact me at: PJ-Comix.

Let me know if you want on the DUmmie FUnnies PING List.

1 posted on 04/19/2005 6:06:25 AM PDT by PJ-Comix
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To: PJ-Comix

FIRST!!


2 posted on 04/19/2005 6:07:35 AM PDT by beaureguard
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To: Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; tje; ml1954; ...

PING!


3 posted on 04/19/2005 6:08:25 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

4th?


4 posted on 04/19/2005 6:12:30 AM PDT by JimWforBush
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To: PJ-Comix
4th?
5 posted on 04/19/2005 6:12:50 AM PDT by The_Victor (Doh!... stupid tagline)
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To: JimWforBush

Dangit!


6 posted on 04/19/2005 6:13:13 AM PDT by The_Victor (Doh!... stupid tagline)
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To: PJ-Comix

"My two Euros..."


Must be one of those geniuses who joined the worldwide fight against globalism.


7 posted on 04/19/2005 6:16:27 AM PDT by cripplecreek (I don't suffer from stress. I am a carrier!)
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To: PJ-Comix

They have made their mind up. It has to be fraud. How can anyone reject their winning ideas.

These DUmmies have huge trouble handling rejection.


8 posted on 04/19/2005 6:16:58 AM PDT by speed_addiction (Ninja's last words, "Hey guys. Watch me just flip out on that big dude over there!")
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To: PJ-Comix

They are so fun to watch! They will always cry foul when they lose. They are spoiled little children who need the "Super Nanny!" LOL!


9 posted on 04/19/2005 6:18:46 AM PDT by imskylark
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To: PJ-Comix
Locking. This has digressed into a flamefest

As soon as anything resembling a debate actually ensues on their board, they squash it. Have to tow the party line, like good little communists!

10 posted on 04/19/2005 6:20:38 AM PDT by Ronaldus Magnus Reagan
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To: PJ-Comix

This is a great one PJ. One DUmmie trying to talk a little sense to the other DUmmies but to no avail! The longer that they DON"T get it the better for us!


11 posted on 04/19/2005 6:21:47 AM PDT by Ditter
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To: imskylark

Wasn't it fun replacing all those voting machines with fake ones....What?......Uh...I mean...What machines?


12 posted on 04/19/2005 6:23:33 AM PDT by Dallas59 (" I have a great team that is going to beat George W. Bush" John Kerry -2004)
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To: PJ-Comix
It's not our responsibility to accept "that we lost".

Oh, this is just so sad. :)

13 posted on 04/19/2005 6:25:19 AM PDT by KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle ("As a conservative site, Free Republic is pro-G-d, PRO-LIFE..." -- FR founder Jim Robinson)
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To: PJ-Comix
Locking. This has digressed into a flamefest.

I have seen much more spirited flamefests on DU that were not shut down. I suspect the moderator is disturbed because one of the ants on the farm was exhibiting a teensy weensy smidgen of common sense, a commodity that rarely, if ever, shows it's unfamiliar face on DU.

14 posted on 04/19/2005 6:27:18 AM PDT by epow (Fight crime, shoot back.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Just to confess to everyone here: We Republicans DID steal the last two Presidential Elections. Heh Heh Heh Heh Heh.

The democrats haven't seen anything yet. Wait until the 2006 elections, when we steal all 435 U.S. House seats. That will really get them mad. Heh Heh Heh Heh Heh.


15 posted on 04/19/2005 6:32:57 AM PDT by PetroniDE (We Don't Live in Texas Anymore --- State Name is Now TAXES !!)
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To: PJ-Comix
It's not our responsibility to accept "that we lost". America lost. We need to step up and DEMAND ACCOUNTABILITY FOR ELECTION FRAUD/THEFT.

And these people would be standing up in Washington state? Waiting.....waiting....

16 posted on 04/19/2005 6:33:56 AM PDT by randog (What the....?!)
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To: The_Victor
4th?

No. Fifth but you are forgiven.

17 posted on 04/19/2005 6:36:33 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix
Hey Democrats --- Friendly Reminder.

I'M YOUR DADDY !! (boom boom boom boom boom)
I'M YOUR DADDY !! (boom boom boom boom boom)
I'M YOUR DADDY !! (boom boom boom boom boom)
I'M YOUR DADDY !! (boom boom boom boom boom)
I'M YOUR DADDY !! (boom boom boom boom boom)

18 posted on 04/19/2005 6:42:47 AM PDT by PetroniDE (We Don't Live in Texas Anymore --- State Name is Now TAXES !!)
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To: PetroniDE

From your lips to God's ears. Also 61 Senate seats. And all the governorships up for election.


19 posted on 04/19/2005 6:47:09 AM PDT by chesley
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To: chesley

Others Freepers are in charge of fixing the Senate/Governor elections. I can't give you their names (if I tell you, I have to kill you). Heh Heh Heh Heh Heh.


20 posted on 04/19/2005 6:50:37 AM PDT by PetroniDE (We Don't Live in Texas Anymore --- State Name is Now TAXES !!)
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