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Move over PEST now there is PEES
Route 82 Blog ^ | 11/20/04 | Mark McNally

Posted on 11/20/2004 7:48:27 AM PST by NeoCaveman

Last week the blue-staters got a whole lot bluer. In Boca Raton Florida a psychiatrist said that he was treating a dozen people for what he termed “Post Election Selection Trauma”. Apparently there are liberals so dejected that they are turning to psychotherapy and prescription drugs to get through four more years. No one has yet confirmed if these prescription drugs were re-imported from Canada.

There has been a real outpouring of compassion for these dejected Democrats including on air counseling by Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity. I guess this is what President Bush meant by “compassionate conservatism”.

While this is all very compassionate and it is nice to help them through their grieving process, I have to ask the question “where is the equal time”. I have identified a psychological phenomena afflicting thousands maybe millions, possibly 61 million Americans. It is Post Election Elation Syndrome or PEES.

Now I am sure you are wondering if you have the PEES. So, I “Dr. Mark” will identify a few symptoms and you can see if you are so afflicted.

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor, and am not licensed by any medical board. After checking, I found out that playing doctor does not get you any credits towards a medical degree. It’s just a fun thing to do.

The first symptom is something the Germans call schadenfreude. Schadenfreude is a German word for taking joy in the suffering of others. I really believe that only the German culture could come up with such a word. I’ve heard that the word was first used to describe the feeling they got after sacking a French village and of course the French women, over a thousand years ago.

So do you have the schadenfreude associated with PEES? Do you laugh out loud every time you see a car that still has a Kerry bumper sticker? Have you emailed any losing Democrat candidate with the simple message of “LLOOOOOOSSSER, Bwahahahaha”? Do the appearances of Michael Moore, Janine Garafolo, and Al Franken now just make you laugh? These behaviors and others like it mean you’ve got PEES related schadenfreude.

Now I know what you thinking, your thinking ok I’ve got the schadenfreude but that doesn’t mean I am afflicted with PEES. Well, you are right. Schadenfreude alone does not mean you’ve got the PEES.

To have PEES you must be suffering under the other and more deeply troubling symptom. This symptom is called grinning like an idiot. If you have a perpetual smile or smirk and have been a general pain in the bum because you are so happy, then you do have the PEES.

Luckily PEES is something that you can live with and manage. So go ahead and enjoy, or as I say give PEES a chance. Go ahead and express your PEES on the liberal of your choice. Then after a long day of work, sit on your couch and crack open the adult beverage of your choice and just visualize world PEES.


TOPICS: Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: marafatpeas; pees; pest; route82
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OK this is my first stab at writing political humor. I was going for a kind of PJ O'Rourke style column.

Your comments and criticism is welcome

1 posted on 11/20/2004 7:48:28 AM PST by NeoCaveman
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To: xsmommy; Happygal; WhyisaTexasgirlinPA; DollyCali; cyborg

PINGS.


2 posted on 11/20/2004 7:49:17 AM PST by NeoCaveman ("I expressed myself rather forcefully, felt better after I had done it," -- VP Cheney)
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To: dubyaismypresident

I like it. For a first effort, just let me say, "you've written a few that you did'nt like and that we have'nt seen, have you?"


3 posted on 11/20/2004 7:54:00 AM PST by L,TOWM (Time to take the kid gloves OFF, Mr. President...)
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To: L,TOWM
Thanks

For a first effort, just let me say, "you've written a few that you did'nt like and that we have'nt seen, have you?"

Oh sure. In fact. I have a few shorter and poorly proofed articles at my blog, but this is the first humor one.

4 posted on 11/20/2004 7:56:27 AM PST by NeoCaveman ("I expressed myself rather forcefully, felt better after I had done it," -- VP Cheney)
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To: dubyaismypresident
Excellent article Dubs - I am so relieved to know that I actually have a diagnosis for my perpetual smile.............

I think I heard that R.Kelly has this too....oh wait, that was a different type of PEES.............

5 posted on 11/20/2004 7:58:13 AM PST by WhyisaTexasgirlinPA (Thank you President Bush, and thank you America!)
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To: dubyaismypresident
blue-staters

Instead of calling these losers blue-staters, a more apprpriate term (with BJ Clinton in mind) might be blue-dressers.

6 posted on 11/20/2004 7:58:57 AM PST by jigsaw (God Bless Our Troops.)
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To: dubyaismypresident
It should be Post Election Losers Trauma.

Pray for W and Our Troops

7 posted on 11/20/2004 8:00:21 AM PST by bray (Nam Vets Rock!!)
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To: jigsaw
Instead of calling these losers blue-staters, a more apprpriate term (with BJ Clinton in mind) might be blue-dressers.

Blue state blue dressers? I like it.

8 posted on 11/20/2004 8:00:32 AM PST by NeoCaveman ("I expressed myself rather forcefully, felt better after I had done it," -- VP Cheney)
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To: WhyisaTexasgirlinPA
Thanks.

LOL. R. Kelly.

9 posted on 11/20/2004 8:01:14 AM PST by NeoCaveman ("I expressed myself rather forcefully, felt better after I had done it," -- VP Cheney)
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To: dubyaismypresident; Txslady; carenot

PING! hahahahahahaha


10 posted on 11/20/2004 8:02:58 AM PST by countrydummy (#RIGHTALK.. http://www.rightalk.com)
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To: dubyaismypresident
Damn good for a 'first stab' junior!

Nothing wrong with those Schadenfreude symptoms. Slapstick comedy, Vaudeville and todays sitcoms were spawned from the glorious 'ooze' of Schadenfreude!

I was filthy with Schadenfreude when Rapist #42 went through his impeachment tribulations. I loved hearing of him playing golf in the rain as the moon rose. Ahhh... Schadenfreude!!

11 posted on 11/20/2004 8:03:22 AM PST by johnny7 (“We blowed 'em up real good!” -John Candy & Joe Flaherty, SCTV)
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To: johnny7
I was filthy with Schadenfreude when Rapist #42 went through his impeachment tribulations. I loved hearing of him playing golf in the rain as the moon rose. Ahhh... Schadenfreude!!

Now that is good schadenfreude.

12 posted on 11/20/2004 8:16:11 AM PST by NeoCaveman ("I expressed myself rather forcefully, felt better after I had done it," -- VP Cheney)
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To: Slip18; Cyber Liberty

From just a thought on Thursday to an artilce on Saturday. I'm deeply indebted to Al Gore for inventing the internet.


13 posted on 11/20/2004 8:26:03 AM PST by NeoCaveman ("I expressed myself rather forcefully, felt better after I had done it," -- VP Cheney)
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To: diotima; Bob J

Whatcha think?


14 posted on 11/20/2004 8:26:59 AM PST by NeoCaveman ("I expressed myself rather forcefully, felt better after I had done it," -- VP Cheney)
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To: dubyaismypresident

PEES on the Dem whiners


15 posted on 11/20/2004 8:43:57 AM PST by NRA1995 (Free Republic Inaugural Ball II, here I come!!!)
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To: dubyaismypresident

Give Pees a chance! :-)

I like it!


16 posted on 11/20/2004 9:33:11 AM PST by Happygal (liberalism - a narrow tribal outlook largely founded on class prejudice)
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To: dubyaismypresident

you are quite the PEE-er, dubs! kudos ; )


17 posted on 11/20/2004 10:00:34 AM PST by xsmommy
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To: dubyaismypresident

HAHAHAHAHAH...smirk.


18 posted on 11/20/2004 10:01:18 AM PST by Bob J (Rightalk.com...coming soon!)
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To: dubyaismypresident

Yer gettin' there. And I still have a Bush yard sign (stolen several times before the election and destoyed once after it) sitting in front of my house, so I guess I must meet the qualifications!


19 posted on 11/20/2004 10:04:41 AM PST by livius
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To: dubyaismypresident

Marafats?


20 posted on 11/20/2004 10:14:31 AM PST by Irish_Thatcherite (Ireland, get off the f'n' fence, and fight the War on Terror.)
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