Posted on 09/30/2004 10:48:15 AM PDT by dandelion
I light the candles, as I have all the nights before, setting the stage - the pink night-shirt, the furry slippers, the rose-scented ungent with which I anoint my fingers. I loosen my waist-length hair from its clasp and approach the keyboard with anticipation.
Who will it be tonight? Bush? Cheney? Kerry? Edwards? They all present delights, but it's not so much the man as the act of campaigning itself that thrills me so. Memories of Reagan suddenly stir - ahh, that brings a jaded tear. How innocent that first fling seems -
The bedroom door bursts open; my husband, breathing heavily in the half-light, is illuminated by the guilty flicker of my monitor. He grabs my wrists, and pulls me to himself: I breathe in, trying vainly to hide the smell of the Diet Lime Coke. Too late; repelled and yet fascinated, he flings me upon the bed, his voice heavy with jealousy -
"You've been blogging again. POLITICAL blogging..."
I weep. It is true. I thought I could just sneak in for a few minutes, catch a few news threads, maybe just hit one poll. But no, I have to come clean.
I am a Votophile. A political nymphomaniac. A woman who slips through life being the good mother, the good wife, the good daughter, until I smell the faint odor of - of - springtime in Iowa. The primaries. The Candidates! Then the old longing returns, and I am drawn into the arms of a craving so powerful, so immediate, that I cannot turn away.
It used to be just the TV. Once a day, in the evenings; a girl could pretend to be preparing dinner, just minding business in the kitchen. La la la hm hmm hmmm, yes dear...
But in reality, the news filled my hungry mind with the vagaries of life on the Hill, the antics of the Congress, the scandals of the corrupt. It was all I could do to wait til evening, and the supplier of news (however biased he was) was a welcome man in the kitchen indeed. The guilty pleasures of the screen seemed that much more sweet, knowing that I couldn't get it but once a day.
Then came the Internet.
My downward spiral truly started with the Lewinsky affair - after all, one wouldn't want to view such tawdry affairs in front of the children now, would we? But that excuse wore thin when Election 2000 came - I believe that is when my husband first started to suspect something. The long hours spent in the bedroom, alone?
I was really with Matt Drudge.
How far I have fallen in four years! What was once an evenings-only recreational "hit" has become an around-the-clock struggle for political goodies. So easy, so free, so available to me, at all hours of the day.
Need polls? I got your Gallup right here, baby, plus a little Quinnipac on the side if you want to try something more "liberal" - the boys on Blogs for Bush will be posting anytime now...
Want quotes? I got quotes that you're just dying to hear - but you've got to come in and get 'em. The laundry can wait, sweetie - Powerline has some hot posts, and I need to get me some...
Pics? Oh, sweet darlin' we've got pics galore! How 'bout some Orange Kerry, or Cedar Bush? Nothing's too hard to get on the Net - and FreeRepublic will do me up right...
I realize what I have become. While my husband was out of town, I pulled nearly 24 hours of solid blogging, stopping only to rest and feed the fish. It is shameful, bad, naughty the way I've been surreptiously trolling Democrats Underground, just to get a cheap political thrill from the dark side. I've hit Rock Bottom. I've hit the skids. I'm pathetic. And tomorrow, I'm changing my ways, honey. It's only you from now on, I swear it -
Right after I "live blog" the Presidential Debates.
LOL my husband read this and he actually got JEALOUS. I told him there were hundreds of others pathetic, addicted women just like me on FreeRepublic!
and again...........
third time's charm!
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.