Posted on 06/10/2002 4:35:38 AM PDT by Pern
Isolated incidents of oral sex on campus and talk among middle-school students of the behavior occurring at off-campus parties has alarmed some Fayette County school administrators and parents who plan meetings on the topic.
Physicians, including one who has seen an increase in sexually transmitted diseases among middle school students, and other professionals are promoting frank discussions about oral sex to discourage students from engaging in it. Still, all agree the practice is limited to a small number of students, some of whom do not equate oral sex to intercourse.
Since Beaumont Middle School principal Tom Mowery wrote to parents in December asking them "to be aware of the prevalence of oral sex at off-campus parties at the middle-school level," administrators at one school referred an incident to law enforcement, and administrators at another school, Jessie Clark Middle, called in parents to discuss a situation.
Diane Woods, the district's middle school director, put the topic on the agenda for a future principals meeting. She said she was notified of a report of oral sex occurring between two students on campus at Tates Creek Middle School several weeks ago.
Without releasing specifics, Tates Creek Middle School assistant principal Earl Stivers said the incident was investigated "both by law enforcement and administratively."
Students' remarks have made doctors and parents fear the activity is more widespread.
Dr. Hatim Omar, a University of Kentucky specialist in adolescent medicine, said that just since January, he has treated at least 10 middle school-age students for sexually transmitted diseases they said they had contracted through oral sex. That's up from six cases in 2001 and two each in 1999 and 2000.
Four students, treated for tonsillitis caused by gonorrhea, attributed their conditions to so-called "head parties," Omar said.
Also since January, he has seen students from every middle school in Fayette County who admit that they have engaged in oral sex or attended parties where students have engaged in oral sex.
Parents and administrators are responding. Besides principals addressing the topic, Beaumont PTA president Debbie Boian wants middle school PTA leaders to discuss developing programs at each school to talk to students about risky behavior.
"It's easy to say, 'Oh those kids are just bragging about having oral sex,'" Boian said. "But if there is any truth to it, you should" address the issue.
Nationally, public-health experts report that teen-agers appear to be engaging in high-risk sexual practices without caution and with alarming casualness. Nearly 1 in 10 reports losing his or her virginity before the age of 13, a 15 percent increase since 1997, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. According to several surveys, as many as half of teens ages 13 to 19 say they have had oral sex. Other communities across the country are grappling with the problem and are instituting policies that require more supervision and education.
Lexington pediatrician Tom Pauly said his patients are asking him about oral sex and telling him they think it's safer than vaginal intercourse.
"It's a new issue," said Bryan Station Middle Counselor Lynette Schmiedeknecht. "It's more part of the culture, more talked about. It seems that in talking with the kids, they don't consider oral sex (to be) sex. They just think it's something they do as an adolescent."
Dealing with incidents directly and speaking bluntly with middle school students is key to helping them understand the ramifications of their decisions, parents and doctors said. Damage to reputations and illnesses are two of the dangers.
"We advise them to abstain," Pauly said. "We talk about medical complications and the psychosocial complications of engaging in oral sex at such a young age."
After Jessie Clark Middle students talked about the popularity of oral sex with an assistant principal this spring, principal Steve Carmichael said: "We invited two moms to come in and shared our concerns. It wasn't a conversation as awkward as you might think. We would rather overreact than underreact."
The issue isn't a routine part of sex education classes, officials said.
Mike Kennedy, acting health education coordinator, said that until 1990, the district had a sex education curriculum. But now, site-based councils at each school are responsible for deciding what kind of sex education is dispensed, he said.
Seven middle schools offer programs that teach abstinence only, Kennedy said. Other schools cover sex education in health classes. But Kennedy said he doesn't think oral sex is discussed anywhere as part of the middle school curriculum.
At Beaumont, principal Mowery said the quick intervention -- writing to parents -- was successful. Parents responded to meetings about how to discuss sexual issues with their children. And as the year progressed, counselors and administrators had fewer kids talking about the parties.
Only a small minority of students have actually had oral sex, Mowery thinks.
"Ninety percent of our kids," he said, "make good decisions in every aspect of their lives."
Well, that's definitely my philosophy when it comes to middle school children and sex. As adults, I think most of us have no problem with other adults living their life like they see fit. Middle school kids need guidance and positive peers.
Looks to me like they are gearing up for multiple unhappy marriages.
Low OiL
Many partners do not have to be made. Some do not see it as disgusting. Not everyone swallows, anyway. BTW, how is it immoral?
It is gross, except to boys who are too selfish to think of what the girls involved are expected to do. And you're right about parents being unfit. To say that that's OK to their daughters is very unfair to them, and helps those daughters to devalue themselves greatly.
I'm sure that's true. But I do know for a fact that there are many, many men who don't want used goods for their wives. To each his own, I guess. As I said in the previous post, I'm very grateful and touched that my wife was a virgin when we married. It's something that means a lot to me, as it should.
And if the girl is willing to do it because she loves her partner? Is it demeaning to a guy to reciprocate?
And you're right about parents being unfit. To say that that's OK to their daughters is very unfair to them, and helps those daughters to devalue themselves greatly.
Little Jenny, let me talk to you about oral sex and swallowing semen. Don't. do. it.
For many, especially religious Christians, Jews and Muslims, premarital sex is considered something that is against God's will. Since you are an atheist, that won't mean much to you. But for those to whom it does mean something, it also makes a great deal of sense. In my life, almost all I know who've engaged in premarital sex have had less fulfilling marriages than those who have. I trust God on this, and it makes sense to me.
I honestly think of it as a grey area. It is, but it isn't. To use the baseball definition - 2nd base. There;s a reason it's only called 2nd base.
(putting on flame suit)
Yoy're out of your depth ; perhaps you'd like to quit now ?
It seems that [if the religious right on this thread is an indicator] most of the conservatives hold virginity as the only thing that a woman can have to offer to a husband and that once it's gone she is worthless. Personally, I don't devalue the totality of the woman in this way. I guess that's one difference between them and us... they believe that sex is the only thing of value that a woman has [and that if she shares it with someone, all value is lost] while I hold a woman's mind to be of far greater value.
How many parents encourage their seventeen year old daughters to identify themselves as such on the internet,including the posting of a picture?
Most loving parents hope and pray that their daughters trust in their love enough to understand that their parents are trying their hardest to protect them from experiences like yours. There are always boys who will take advantage of easy girls. What's amazing is that so many girls don't even realize it's being done to them.
So. An 18 year old. Cannot handle sex better than a 12 year old?
that said, this topic is contentious enough for adults. middle schoolers who have been introduced to this behavior is another issue entirely.
Maybe I live on my own....
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