New Study: Breast size determines personality

Annanova ^ | 2/22/05

[KidGlock]

Breast size determines personality

An Italian sex researcher claims he can tell a woman's personality from the size and shape of her breasts.

According to German newspaper Bild sexologist Piero Lorenzoni said: "A woman's breasts denote a woman's character, just like her star sign."

He has categorised breast types according to fruits and says men can draw up their own horoscope-type chart that indicates what a woman's chest size says about her.

The fruity chart starts naturally with the traditional melon. According to Lorenzoni, a woman with large, round breasts like a melon may appear motherly, but is far from it. "She likes eating and wants to be spoiled and admired. But seldom likes sex," he said.

For men who want someone a bit more lively they should choose a woman with "lemon" breasts - pert and prominent. "These women are full of life and can laugh at themselves. They want a balanced life without surprises."

Pert, oval-shaped breasts are for Lorenzoni like pineapples. "A woman with pineapple breasts is intelligent, often has a career but is still romantic. They are also faithful. Whoever wins their heart will not lose it quickly."

Grapefruit-shaped breasts - pert and firm - are also not a good sign for good sex. "This woman may look erotic, but in reality is bashful and homely. She spoils her partner but prefers tenderness over sex."

Even women with "oranges" are not going to turn up the temperature between the sheets. "While she is self-confident and knows her goals, she has little interest in sex. She likes conversation and partnerships."

Small breasted women, with assets that resemble cherries are "funny and very exciting. They are entertaining and intelligent. Make great partners both for everyday life and on holiday and are moderately interested in sex," says the researcher.

A woman with pear-shaped breasts "Loves love in all its variations. She can be very religious, but is known to have affairs."

[Shryke]

Did you mention a wager on....yanking? Hrm.

[OSHA]

A woman with pear-shaped breasts "Loves love in all its variations. She can be very religious, but is known to have affairs."

When I get home my wife has some explaining to do!

[StrictTime]

Let the judging begin!

[NeoCaveman]

I was looking forward to cantaloupes...

Here you go

[Sarajevo]

[exnavychick]

LOL!

[processing please hold]

Soooooooo, how do they classify women with large, lemon,oval shaped grapefruit/orange,pear shaped breasts?

[KidGlock]

Great post!

This study may be correct.

I can feel my personality changing already.

[KidGlock]

How do they classify women with odd shaped breasts, where one is larger than the other?

Bi-polar?

[Manic_Episode]

I believe that line was uttered by Emo Phillips, who coincidently just used it on Leno a few days ago. Emo is one wierd but funny guy. At least I think he is a guy.

[processing please hold]

LOLOL......Very few women alive has equally sized breasts, so I guess we're all bi-polar.

[beyond the sea]

My favorite are the Honeydew mellons ---

God, yes!

[Manic_Episode]

What if her **** hang loose like the ***** on a moose?
Or her lips are pink like a roosters **** ???

[TheBigB]

Emo cracks me up! His best line was, "Once I found my girlfriend in bed with another guy! I was crushed! I said 'Get off me, you two!'"

[NonValueAdded]

Thanks for identifying Emo. I googled the name and found The Wisdom Of Emo Phillips along with this little gem:

Emo Phillips was pulled over in Massachusetts for reckless driving. When brought before the judge, Emo was asked if he knew what the punishment for drunk driving in that state was. His reply: "I don't know, re-election to the Senate?"

[OSHA]

The watermellon shaped ones are nice when you need a warm place to sleep.

[ken21]

.

it's a bit more complicated than that, dude!

[nmh]

Will they be doing a follow up study on men and the shape and size of their penises and how this influences their intelligence and personality?

LOL!

It's all bunk. It was just an excuse for some pervert to see breasts and fantasize. Did our tax dollars fund this nonsense?

[WIladyconservative]

Very nice analogies Annie, but I was thinking more like . . hangs to your knees like a turkey wattle? Then forget sex, Tucked up in the nether regions? Forget sex . . . . stuff like that.

[WhyisaTexasgirlinPA]

My Marine would disagree with this study...... ;^)