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Love on a Porn Set: One Woman's Story (ABC Expose of Porn Industry)
ABC News ^ | 5/27/04

Posted on 05/28/2004 5:25:59 AM PDT by Aquinasfan

A Mormon Girl Gets Her Start in the Adult Movie Business

Jan. 23 — When 20-year-old Michelle saw the handsome Spaniard who would later become her fiancé, she thought it was love at first sight.

[WARNING: This article contains descriptions of sexual acts that some readers may find offensive.]

"The day we met, he said, 'You're going to be the mother of my children. I love you,'" she remembers. "You know what I mean? I never had that before. I never had a guy be so in love with me."

The couple met on the set of a porn film in a rented house in Prague in July 2001.

Michelle, the daughter of a retired Air Force captain and former bishop in the Mormon Church, was an up-and-coming starlet in the adult video world. She had had some setbacks in her first year in the business, but believed her career was turning around with the Prague trip, which would be her first starring role. Her co-star, 28-year-old Nacho Vidal, was already a well-established star.

The director had told Michelle that Vidal liked her work, and when the pair saw each other they immediately fell into each other's arms, kissing from one side of the house to the other.

"There's nothing bad about you," she told him admiringly as they prepared for the shoot. "You don't know me very well" he replied with a grin.

But when the director finally got the pair to settle down to the business at hand — filming a sex scene — the tone changed. Without any prompting, Vidal got rough during the sex, slapping Michelle's face violently from side to side, and choking her. [Pleased to meet you/Hope you guessed my name]

Afterward, she looked shaken, her face reddened and her eyes watery. But she insisted she was OK. "I look torn up — can you tell?," she asked an ABCNEWS producer who was following her progress for Primetime. Laughing and wiping her eye, she turned away and said without conviction, "I took a beating today, and it was great."

'Belladonna' Is Born

Michelle had gotten her start in the business at 18, when she came to Los Angeles from her home in Utah to look for work as a nude photograph model. When she failed to get modeling work, her agent encouraged her to try porn. She refused at first. "I always hated porn. I thought it was the most disgusting thing in the world," she told Primetime, which followed her career for more than two years.

But she finally agreed. Taking the name Belladonna, like the poisonous flower, she found herself preparing for what she thought would be a simple boy-girl sex scene. She was shocked when the director told her he wanted her to do anal sex — something she says she had never even thought about before. Worried she'd have to go through with it if she wanted to work again, she let him talk her into it. "I was kind of scared. I didn't know if I could say no," she remembers. "I didn't know any better, you know?"

After the session, she was shattered. "I wasn't ready for anal sex.... It was painful. But I can hide it really well." She had just turned 18, the legal age for participation in sexually explicit films.

Michelle went on more shoots over the next few months. Then her agent sent her on a job where she would have sex with male actors in prison outfits — 12 of them. Once again, she tried to back out, telling the director it was "sick," but once again she was talked into it. She had sex — all kinds — with the 12 men. "It was really hard because I really felt like a piece of meat ... in a lion's cage, 12 lions.... I had to do a lot of things I can't imagine anyone wanting to do." She was paid $4,000.

Afterward, she says, she couldn't stop crying. She packed her bags and went home to her family in Utah.

Glimpse of the Big Time

But within a year, she was back, even agreeing to promote the prison movie that had so upset her.

She began to feel that her career was picking up. She got a small part in a movie for VCA, one of the "high end" companies that produce big-budget films, and hoped it might lead to a contract. On the shoot, she met porn legend Ron Jeremy, who was making a cameo, and began to feel like she was fitting in. "The first second I walk in, this girl grabs my breast, and I'm like, Wow, you know, that's like the best welcome ... 'cause then you feel like, Oh, someone likes me, you know?"

Another company considered giving her a contract, but at a meeting, the owner, veteran porn star Ona Zee, sensed that Michelle was not emotionally ready to become an adult star. "There's a part of me that wants to say to you, 'Run for the hills, girl, do something else, because you can be something better,'" she told her.

At the high-end companies — which produce a small proportion of the thousands of adult titles released each year — performers often have contracts and can make six figures by shooting just eight to 10 movies a year. They can pick their own partners and condoms are generally required. Shot on film with elaborate, sets, costumes and plots, the movies can have budgets up to $250,000.

But Michelle did not get a studio contract, and ended up taking a job with a company known for "gonzo" porn — sex-only, amateur-looking productions shot on video. The company, Elegant Angel, was making a film in Prague and offered her a starring role, which she hoped would show the big studios that she could carry a film.

Love Blossoms in Prague

She was thrilled at the attention Vidal gave her during the week in Prague — but wary. "It's weird to have a guy love you that much. That almost scares me because I have a hard time trusting men," she told Primetime, explaining that her first boyfriend cheated on her repeatedly and ultimately left her for a stripper. Privately, Vidal had told Primetime he could never be with just one woman, and would be happy if Michelle's attraction did not lead anywhere.

She came back to Los Angeles by herself, so sore from the week's filming that she says she could hardly walk. But then she flew to Spain to visit Vidal, and their relationship seemed to be going places. She said he could keep having sex with other women, as long as he agreed to be "honest to me, loyal, and just respect me and tell me that I'm number one every day."

She even began hearing wedding bells, telling Primetime, "The second I get married, I won't having sex with men in this business any more."

Wedding Bells

By December 2001, Michelle and Vidal were engaged. As she proudly showed off her diamond ring, saying how pretty it was, Vidal joked in his Spanish accent, "I need to f—k so many girls for that ring."

The couple was in love, Michelle says, but they were fighting regularly. Vidal would sometimes get what he calls "Latino jealous" when he saw her talking to other men at clubs. Michelle told Primetime, "It's hard to be in a relationship with someone in porn."

By now, she was working steadily, even shooting for the same company she shot the prison gangbang for. "I guess now I've gotten past the whole feeling-bad-about-it thing. I'm like, 'OK, I did it and that was pretty damn rough of me' ... Like wow, you know?," she said with a laugh. "I can say that I've done pretty much everything there is to do, and I can walk away feeling a little proud about it, you know?"

The Primetime producers who had been following her noticed changes. At 18, she had said she would never use drugs, but now Primetime learned that she was sometimes high on marijuana during her scenes. She was working without condoms, though she said the risk of AIDS was never far from her mind — or her prayers. "The fans don't like to see condoms ... If I would have said I want to use condoms every time, I really wouldn't get any work," she explained. She contracted chlamydia, which can make you sterile.

And anal sex — which she had be talked into during her first shoot — was now her specialty. "Funny, isn't it? Something I didn't want to do and now I'm known best for it," she told Primetime. No longer a fresh face in the business, she found she had to agree to even riskier sex acts to earn the same money.

Ona Zee, the producer who had interviewed Michelle the previous year, noticed a difference, too. "I said to my husband, Our baby is all grown up and left home. She's no longer the adorable fresh-faced girl that I met ... Now she's really in the life ... Even in the pictures that I see of her, she's much harder, much tougher."

Behind the Smile

During interviews with Primetime, Michelle kept the happy smile she had always had — even when describing things that many people would find disturbing. However, her composure cracked when Diane Sawyer asked why she always smiled. Tears came to her eyes as she said, "Because I like to hide — hide everything, you know?" Then she began to cry, explaining that she hides her real emotions because she wants to show everyone how happy she is. "And I'm not happy ... I don't like myself at all," she said.

Michelle confessed she often felt physical revulsion during her scenes: "My whole entire body feels it when I'm doing it and ... I feel so — so gross." While pretending to be enjoying the sex, she said, she was in fact counting the minutes, telling herself, "Hey, I only have this much time left. Don't worry about it. Get the check. Gonna go deposit it in your bank." She admitted: "You get addicted to the money."

Like other performers Primetime spoke to, Michelle said that during shooting she often imagines herself outside her body. "I call it the 'other half,'" she said.

Bringing Home a Trophy

In January 2002, Michelle's Prague movie won an award at the Adult Video News awards in Las Vegas, considered the Oscars of the adult industry. Things were not going smoothly with Vidal that day — he complained that Michelle "don't do the ironing my clothes... I still 28 and I need my mother," and at the ceremony he openly checked out other women — but there were crowds of admiring fans for Michelle and she soaked up the attention.

After going on stage to pick the trophy, she was beaming, telling Primetime she had worked hard for it. "I think this is the very beginning of my career, like I've just begun," she said.

And at the 2003 AVN awards two weeks ago, Michelle was an even bigger winner, taking home awards for best supporting actress and three other categories.


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: catholiclist; porn
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To: 54-46 Was My Number
God gave us free choice.

To do good and avoid evil. The first principle of ethics.

261 posted on 05/28/2004 9:31:01 AM PDT by Aquinasfan (Isaiah 22:22, Rev 3:7, Mat 16:19)
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To: Landru; FBD

ABC, Eisner *&* Diane Sawyer can do me a favor.

...they can all go straight to hell.

This applies to the Terrorists as well ....

Welcome to Heaven, Genius!


262 posted on 05/28/2004 9:31:34 AM PDT by MeekOneGOP (There is ONLY ONE good Democrat: one that has just been voted OUT of POWER ! Straight ticket GOP!)
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To: anonymous_user

There are plenty of girls in the business that would vie for a spot to replace a person if needed. I imagine even director's would take part if they were in need of another cast member.


263 posted on 05/28/2004 9:31:47 AM PDT by Liberatio (Please forgive my misspelling. Veritas Vos Liberabit.)
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To: Aquinasfan; GatorGirl; maryz; *Catholic_list; afraidfortherepublic; Antoninus; Askel5; livius; ...

Ping.


264 posted on 05/28/2004 9:32:04 AM PDT by narses (If you want ON or OFF my Catholic Ping List email me. +)
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To: *Catholic_list; sartorius

Anyone feel like doing battle with the libertines? I have to run. Have a great weekend everyone.


265 posted on 05/28/2004 9:32:08 AM PDT by Aquinasfan (Isaiah 22:22, Rev 3:7, Mat 16:19)
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To: Aquinasfan; P-Marlowe

So much for those wonderful nurturing Mormon family values. Bet she never really felt unconditional love from her dad or mom when growing up.


266 posted on 05/28/2004 9:32:16 AM PDT by connectthedots
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To: Nov3
This is someone's child.

You guys have been duped by the femme fatale pose.

That she is someone's child is a biological fact.

However, the truth about her adult personality is in her own words:

She went to LA for the explicit purpose of being a nude model for money;

She chose to become a porn actress;

She says she went to sets thinking "only" intercourse was required, but then found out other acts were required (in other words, she never had any misgivings having sex on camera for money, it was the just the type of sex and the number of partners that troubled her)

She was "talked into" doing things she at first didn't want to do

Why? "THE MONEY"

She knowingly ignored her conscience at several steps of the way, and,looking back on her course, has the insight of an adult on what has happened to her conscience -- unlike a child who either does wrong unknowingly, or is forced to do wrong.

She left LA once THEN WENT BACK voluntarily knowing full well what she was going back to do.

Never, in the entire story, was she EVER coerced, either directly or even indirectly (by poverty or physical addiction, etc). This girl is doing what she wants, for pay.

The rest is rhetoric for her conscience and the TV audience.

267 posted on 05/28/2004 9:32:26 AM PDT by Taliesan (fiction police)
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To: Aquinasfan
" To do good and avoid evil. The first principle of ethics."

Nope, that's Free choice, not->your choice.

268 posted on 05/28/2004 9:33:04 AM PDT by spunkets
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To: Aquinasfan
To do good and avoid evil. The first principle of ethics.

Wonderful; thanks.

269 posted on 05/28/2004 9:35:28 AM PDT by 54-46 Was My Number
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To: garbanzo

This was a repeat,with a few updates.


270 posted on 05/28/2004 9:36:38 AM PDT by Mears
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To: 54-46 Was My Number
...She's at least a 12-pack.

12 pack? You're being verry generous, very generous indeed.

"Kegger" seems more appropo...


271 posted on 05/28/2004 9:39:34 AM PDT by LincolnLover ("Madam, I'm Adam")
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To: Aquinasfan
"Infringements on the right to commit vices? That's an interesting interpretation, to be kind."

"Our Constitution was written for a religious and moral people and is wholly inadequate to the government of any other."
-- John Adams

Doncha just love it when the immoral and non-religious turn to that document for the protection of their immorality?

It's really too bad we don't have a separate Constitution for these selfish, self-centered, immoral, individualistic, and hedonistic pieces of human debris.

272 posted on 05/28/2004 9:40:10 AM PDT by robertpaulsen
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To: Taliesan

"She chose to become a porn actress; "

How is that different than being a prostitute?


273 posted on 05/28/2004 9:40:36 AM PDT by narses (If you want ON or OFF my Catholic Ping List email me. +)
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To: 54-46 Was My Number
I won't shed a tear for her.

Even though Christ shed his blood for you?

274 posted on 05/28/2004 9:42:06 AM PDT by Romulus ("For the anger of man worketh not the justice of God.")
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To: Aquinasfan

Pornography should never have been declared to be protected by free speech. Pornography is in no way free speech, but perversion. There is a very distinct and obvious difference between the two!!! The two DO NOT in anyway coincide!!!


275 posted on 05/28/2004 9:43:26 AM PDT by ChevyZ28 (I am dead, and I vote, whether I know it or not!!!!!!!!)
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To: Aquinasfan
Anyone feel like doing battle with the libertines? I have to run. Have a great weekend everyone.

You mischaracaturize your opponents as libertines, then cut & run.
Aquinas spins at your hypocrisy.

276 posted on 05/28/2004 9:47:12 AM PDT by tpaine ("The line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being." -- Solzhenitsyn)
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To: LincolnLover
12 pack? You're being verry generous, very generous indeed. "Kegger" seems more appropo...

Krikey---In that picture, she's a double-bagger for sure.

277 posted on 05/28/2004 9:47:22 AM PDT by 54-46 Was My Number
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To: MeekOneGOP
"This applies to the Terrorists as well..."

I agree, totally.

There's a *special* place for those who'd murder others.

...in the name of ( fill in the blank ).

278 posted on 05/28/2004 9:49:21 AM PDT by Landru (Indulgences: 2 for a buck.)
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To: Aquinasfan
Are you equating law based on the natural law, like ours, with Sharia law?

I'm equating law made on a religious basis - like the one you're suggesting - with law made on a religious basis, like sharia law. Their rationale for banning pornography is exactly the same as yours.

279 posted on 05/28/2004 9:49:55 AM PDT by jimt
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To: AppyPappy

I've only read a few of these replies but it is already obvious there are hard hearted animals on FreeRepublic.


280 posted on 05/28/2004 9:53:05 AM PDT by Diva
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